As far as traditions stuff goes, for the frat (preferred anonymity), every winter… I think the first Saturday night after classes, we do Pint Night, which is like our version of Secret Santa. And you get assigned them and you get them a pint of alcohol…but actually it’s a half-pint. So like 5 or 6 shots.

And you can be nice to them and you request what you want so you could be nice and get them what they want.

But the tradition is if you say “fireball”, that’s the bitch move. So then your person is definitely not going to get you that. Freshman year, I didn’t know that, so I put it and then I got gin.

And then this year I put soko, but I guess they misinterpreted and thought that was a bitch move, and they gave me scotch.

So what happens… an alum, dressed as Santa, comes and picks 2 people, you got 2 at a time, he calls you up and you have to race the person you’re against. 3, 2, 1, start drinking and then when you’re done you slam the bottle in the trash can right after.

And the matchups are not random, someone picks who you’re racing against. The best one was our president at the time was against the hind tit of our pledge class.

What is the hind tit?

Oh, hind tit is the worst pledge. So they’re initiated last. Actually the worst pledge is second to last, the hind tit is more like a joke in their pledge class. Like one kid shit himself while the pledge master was carrying him home, so that kid became the hind tit.

But like President vs Vice President and stuff like that is a good matchup. And you tally who wins for each family. So the families are named by different colors. So this year my family, pink family, and my pledge class both won. It’s all just bragging rights. Everyone forgets about it in like a week.

How did you learn this tradition?

Well you kind of just get thrown into it your first time. If you’re a fall pledge, it’s your very first semester in it. And then spring pledges, not til the end of the next fall.

How long have you been doing it?

Long before I got here. Uh, for probably since our refounding or close to that. Everyone gets really fucked up. I think I peed myself that night.

Wow. I’m definitely putting that in the archives.

Just put “anonymous fraternity at USC”.