Author Archives: Kelly Mettler

Jokes – United States of America

Why couldn’t Helen Keller drive?

Because she was a woman.

Why don’t women wear watches?

Because there’s a clock on the stove.

Why can’t women ski?

Because there’s no snow between the kitchen and the bedroom.

What do you do when your dishwasher stops working?

Slap her and tell her to keep washing.

Why are women’s feet so small?

So that they can be closer to the stove.

Kathy says that she first heard these jokes from her older brother, sometime when she was in high school. When she first told them to me, there was another female present, but no males were around to hear the jokes.

I’ve noticed that men are often wary of telling these jokes in front of groups of people for fear of offending someone. Feminists often view these sexist jokes as offensive and degrading. However, some women do enjoy sharing these jokes. Personally, I find each of the above jokes funny because they are so ridiculous. I have a hard time believing that anyone would take a single one of these jokes seriously.

Each of these jokes contains elements of misogyny: the beliefs that women only belong in the kitchen and the bedroom and that women are poor drivers. I think the first joke is particularly interesting. Helen Keller should be deemed unable to drive because of her status as a deaf and blind person. However, this joke totally ignores those handicaps and states that the reason she couldn’t drive is merely because she was female. The other jokes all have to do with the idea of men “using” women, and the idea that women are only good for the kitchen and the bedroom: cooking for men and pleasing them sexually.

For me, the non-Helen Keller other jokes held a bit of surprise. When I first heard the questions, the idea that women only belong in the bedroom or the kitchen was not running through my mind at all—I thought the answers would have been something clever and witty, not some leftovers from the Women’s Rights Movement. When Kathy told me the punch lines, each of them was unexpected. Even though she told me five sexist jokes, I was still astonished that the answers would be that narrow-minded towards women. Although they surprised me in this way, I still thought that, overall, the jokes were funny.

Joke – United States of America

Joseph (10:57:24 PM): ok

Joseph (10:58:03 PM): will smith ordered some food at a korean restaurant. when the waitress asked if he wanted anything else, he replied “i’m getting chigae with it”

Joseph (10:58:20 PM): context it’s performed in…

Joseph (10:58:45 PM): i don’t really know

Joseph (10:58:46 PM): either

Joseph (10:58:54 PM): you say it to koreans who have bad english

Joseph (10:58:58 PM): or koreans who have bad korean

Joseph (10:59:00 PM): lol

Joseph (10:59:07 PM): stuff like that

Me (10:59:09 PM): ok

Joseph (10:59:10 PM): is known as a “fob joke”

Me (10:59:14 PM): alright

Joseph (10:59:21 PM): i first heard it from…

Joseph (10:59:29 PM): i don’t know, i heard it in like elementary school

Me (10:59:33 PM): lol ok

Me (10:59:47 PM): now, is “chigae” pretty accurate, in terms of pronunciation?

Joseph (11:00:38 PM): hmm

Joseph (11:00:42 PM): i guess its more like

Joseph (11:00:44 PM): jji gae

Joseph (11:00:47 PM): like a hard J

Me (11:00:54 PM): ok

Joseph (11:00:54 PM): so that it almost sounds like

Joseph (11:00:55 PM): Ch

Joseph (11:00:57 PM): if you know what i mean

Me (11:01:00 PM): lol

Me (11:01:01 PM): I think so

Me (11:01:09 PM): and what would that word look like in korean?

Joseph (11:02:12 PM): ??

Joseph (11:02:18 PM): unless you can’t read that

Me (11:02:19 PM): ok

Me (11:02:22 PM): no, it shows up on my computer

Joseph (11:02:23 PM): ok

*Bold and underlined text above indicates the joke.

*”Jjigae” (pronounced chee-geh) is the Korean equivalent to the Western stew, often heavily seasoned with chile pepper and served boiling hot.

*The term “fob” is an acronym for “fresh off the boat,” and refers to people who have newly immigrated to the United States.

When Joseph first told me this joke, I didn’t think it was very funny, mainly because I didn’t know what “chigae/jjigae” was. After he explained it to me, the joke made a lot more sense, and I could see how the joke was humorous.

Will Smith, a popular American entertainer, released the song “Gettin’ Jiggy wit It” in 1997. So, this joke could not have appeared prior to 1997 (terminus post quem 1997). The joke’s punchline plays on the song title, replacing “jiggy” with “jjigae”; instead of referring to dancing, Will Smith is now indicating that he would like to eat jjigae. This joke is probably very successful in the Korean-American community, where there is some knowledge of popular culture in the United States. The joke would lose its humor if the Korean listeners weren’t familiar with Will Smith, just as I didn’t find the joke funny when I didn’t know what “jjigae” was.

This joke is a good demonstration of how American and Korean culture can blend. It is a nice example of immigrants adopting new culture and adapting their old culture in order for them to align more easily. In order to fully understand the joke, it is necessary to have some knowledge of both American and Korean cultures: American to know who Will Smith is, and Korean to know what “jjigae” is.

It’s interesting that Joseph says this joke is most popular among Koreans who have “bad English” and Koreans who have “bad Korean.” Because the joke has its roots in both cultures, American and Korean, it is easily understood by those who do not feel their language skills in either English or Korean are particularly strong. It’s also interesting that Joseph mentioned this joke’s status as a “fob joke.” For someone who has just immigrated to America, it is probably reassuring to know that not all aspects of the native culture have been lost—certain aspects have found their way into local culture (here, the term “jjigae”). Because of this, it is probably an exciting feeling for immigrants when they feel like they can understand and appreciate a local joke, and through it feel more connected to their new environment.

Prank – United States of America

For this prank to work, you need a bunch of people in a room, but one of them needs to be a sleeping, unsuspecting victim. All at once, everyone screams, someone shines a light in the now-awake person’s face, and then someone else hits them really hard on the face with a pillow.

My friend Michael first learned this prank from some friends at his high school about two years ago. He’s never been a victim of this prank, but his friends who told him about this prank have pulled this prank on someone else. The setting was a bunch of guys staying over at someone’s house, and the first person asleep was subjected to the prank. The main purpose of the prank is to startle the individual.

Based on what Michael told me, this would probably be a pretty funny prank to witness: someone is sleeping peacefully, when all of a sudden he or she is jolted awake by a very loud noise, then is overcome with confusion as a bright light shines in his or her face and he or she is hit with a pillow. The victim’s facial expressions (and startled yelps) are most likely quite humorous. It is also probably embarrassing for the victim. If this prank is a standard procedure for someone who goes to sleep first when there are a lot of people around, then high value is doubtless placed on being able to stay awake. To fall asleep would be to bear the punishment via this prank of having been the first to succumb to slumber. Staying awake would contribute to a sense of pride, especially since this is performed by a group of people: who is able to stay awake the longest? Who is tough enough to avoid giving in to sleep?

Although this prank is relatively mild, there are some violent elements in it: loud noise, bright light, getting hit in the face…not a peaceful way to wake up. I had never heard of this prank before Michael told me about it. Perhaps its violence is linked to a masculine pattern of participation? Stereotypically, males are associated with more aggressive behavior; perhaps males are more familiar with this kind of prank than are females. However, this is not to say that the violence of this prank makes it unique to males—rather than the fact I’m female, it could be that I’ve never heard of it before due to regional differences (Michael grew up on California, I grew up in Washington), or just the fact that my circle of friends never happened to encounter this particular prank before. I do think it would be interesting to see if this prank is more commonly observed among males, and if the prank’s aggressiveness contributes to this.

Joke – United States of America

What do you call a paraplegic nailed to a wall?

Art.

What do you call a paraplegic lying on the floor?

Matt.

Everett says that he learned these jokes from his mother, and has even come up with a few of his own paraplegic jokes (although he couldn’t remember them at the time of collection). He probably learned them sometime during high school, about the time when my father told me about some paraplegic jokes. However, my dad learned them from a joke book rather than hearing them for the first time from an actual person, so they are listed below this analysis. It is clear from these examples that many versions of paraplegic jokes exist.

All of these paraplegic jokes consist of a question followed by a one-word punchline that is both an American name and a word that can have an alternate meaning such as a noun, verb, or adjective. In the jokes from Everett, both of the names can be used as nouns. Art, short for Arthur, is taken in the joke to mean artistic visual creations that would be displayed on a wall. Matt, short for Matthew, sounds like “mat,” an object that people walk on. In the jokes from my dad, Bob and Skip are both verbs describing what would presumably happen if a paraplegic was in these situations—if a paraplegic tries to swim, he or she will just bob and float in the water; if a paraplegic tries to water ski, he or she will just be pulled along by the boat, skipping across the water. The last joke implies that the paraplegic has sunk to the bottom of the body of water, as the punchline is the adjective “sandy.” Perhaps these different punchlines (noun versus verb versus adjective) are due to oicotypical variation—Everett is from Hawaii, while my father has lived in the contiguous United States for almost his entire life.

Some people might be apprehensive about telling these jokes in front of others. They might be afraid that the paraplegic jokes might be perceived as offensive toward paraplegics or people sensitive to others with physical handicaps. The performer may feel that the question is the offensive part: being nailed to a wall is kind of a gruesome image, if they take the joke literally. Alternatively, the performer may feel that the punchline is the offensive part, mocking the paraplegic’s situation in the joke. Other people think these jokes are clever in the way that they take advantage of homonymic relationships between words and proper names, and try to think of their own paraplegic jokes, as Everett says he does. Beyond the cleverness, one of the reasons why these jokes are so successful is because they challenge authority. People are generally told not to poke fun at disabled people, but these jokes bring the mockery of disabled people to the forefront. The “taboo” sense of these jokes probably makes them all the more successful.

Rick Mettler’s paraplegic jokes:

What do you call a paraplegic swimmer?

Bob.

What do you call a paraplegic water skier?

Skip.

What do you call a paraplegic scuba diver?

Sandy.

Jokes – United States of America

Yo mama is so fat, her cereal bowl has a lifeguard.

Yo mama is so fat, when a car hit her, she asked “Who threw that rock?”

Yo mama is so fat, when I swerved around her I ran out of gas.

Everett first heard these jokes in middle school (6-8th grade, between 2000-2003). This about the time that “your mom” jokes and comments started getting popular. The idea of the “your mom” movement was to try to respond to as many questions as possible with the response “your mom.” Usually meant as a joke, some people took these comments as personal jabs towards their mothers. Examples of questions meriting a “your mom” response would include: “What were you doing last night?” “Who’s your date on Friday?” The “Yo” in the phrases above are shortened forms of “your.”

In my experience with “your mom” jokes, they are typically used by males. My guess is that the first “your mom” jokes arose with a sexual, demeaning intent. Males probably made the comments about their friends’ mothers, hoping to insult their friends at the expense of the mothers. By answering “your mom,” people are also able to deflect questions that they would rather not answer—if person A asks person B a question that B thinks is none of A’s business, then B could reply to the question with “Your mom.” These “yo mama is so fat…” jokes seem to be extensions of the “your mom” retorts.

Some variation exists within the “yo mama” jokes. In the past, I’ve come across jokes with the adjectives “dumb” or “stupid,” rather than “fat.” In all of these cases, the adjectives have a negative connotation—highly effective if an insult is intended. In the above examples, the phrases following “yo mama is so fat” all bring to mind images of something that is abnormally large and situations that would not exist in real life. As for those who view these jokes as humorous, the more outrageous “fat” situations are probably the funniest. These “yo mama” and “your mom” jokes are so successful because of the way they mock authority. Mothers are stereotypically known as being nurturing and caring, able to love you when no one else does. The juxtaposition of the mother’s character as sensitive and compassionate with an overwhelmingly, alarmingly obese woman is quite striking, fueling the joke’s success—especially if you are able to direct the “yo mama” jokes at a friend (or enemy), away from yourself.