Author Archives: Michelle Segura

Saying

Bros before hoes.

Anthony had little else to comment except for a brief description of the meaning of this phrase. He said simply that it is like choosing your homeboys over your girl, because at the end of the day that is what you have to do.

Anthony’s quote and brief explanation invites a great deal of discussion regarding gender identities and relationships and peer expectations. The phrase itself betrays an almost cavalier attitude and a derogative view of girls and women as little more than “hoes.” The language elevates “bros” or male peers above females, while simultaneously objectifying women and stripping them of all individual identity and character beyond their sexual relationships/ experiences with “bros.” This is revelatory of how many young men may approach women, intimate or love relationships, and their relationships with other males. Close, meaningful relationships with women (not hoes) are not valued as much as tighter bonds with your male peers. It also reflects an emphasis on brotherhood and perhaps even a desire for these bonds not to be weakened by romantic relationships with women that could threaten these important relationships.

This popular saying has been widely commercialized and reproduced in a variety of mediums. Perhaps one of the most current and brilliant reproductions of this saying is the following annotation…

This graphic appears on a t-shirt that is sold widely. This image is from http://www.tshirthell.com/store/product.php?productid+902, one of many vendors online and otherwise.

Mythical Creature

Leprechauns

My grandma used to tell me a story about a leprechaun. If someone likes sinning or doing something bad, a leprechaun would appear and especially to girls. It would tie their hair behind the bed. And for boys it would tie their feet. It would go on until they would repent.

Carlos said that his grandmother would tell him stories often and this was one of the many she would share with him, especially when he was younger. Carlos thought this story was less about scaring him with evil leprechauns, and more about redemption and redeeming yourself.

It is interesting that Carlos used such a strong word as redemption in his reflection of his grandmother’s tale. This story about leprechauns may not overtly address religious themes or moral beliefs, but the story he shared did notably focus on the image of sinning children receiving their just rewards until they stopped doing so. Perhaps Carlos’s grandmother originally first heard this tale about leprechauns in a religious context or it may have emerged from a similar environment. I agree with Carlos that this tale is less about mischievous leprechauns and more about the transformation of the children whom the leprechaun binds. The leprechaun binds both girls and boys with their own bodies, which may reflect the moral bondage of sin or simply misbehaving that they must break free from. The leprechaun lets them go after they have repented, further highlighting the shift in the children’s moral character that takes place once they stop sinning and commence being good little boys and girls.

Saying

Every drunk has a dog.

Carlos heard this popular saying from his older brother who personally experienced the truth of these words. Carlos told me that his brother was out pretty late one night playing basketball. He was dressed baggy, was bald, and generally looked like a gangster. Some guys approached his brother and beat him as they also tried to rob him.  When this was happening, his brother looked away and saw a white, bright dog at the end of the court. Carlos said that his brother believes that this dog protected him from further injury and harm that night.

Carlos did not specifically comment on whether or not he believed his brother or thought the dog’s apparition was necessarily true, but he could appreciate the protection and comfort his brother felt from seeing the dog that night.

Having never heard this saying before, I could also appreciate the comfort offered by these words that almost feel like a guarantee or promise of sorts to drunks. However, I do not think that this promise of comfort, protection, or most importantly, companionship, is limited to drunks or homeless people. The fact that this saying specifically says every drunk has a dog and not a cat or goldfish is revelatory of the saying’s greater meaning. Dogs are typically thought of as “man’s best friend” or companions. There are even stickers that declare that no one needs a life partner per se when you have a dog, a different kind of life partner. So, this saying suggests that anyone who may be as down and out as a drunk or as lonely, poor, seemingly forgotten etc. is not as alone as they may think they are. Perhaps the image of the dog is as symbolic as the image of the drunk and the dog simply embodies the qualities already discussed that might also come in the form of kind strangers, close, friends, or some kind of divine comfort.

Saying

Every drunk has a dog.

Kevin said that this saying was especially close to his heart and was meaningful because of the circumstances of how, when, and from whom he first heard it said. He told me that when he and his grandfather first came from Guatemala to the United States, they were both shocked to see the overwhelming number of homeless people on the streets, something neither of them had experienced much before. His grandfather told him this saying, adding that every drunk or bum has a guardian angel in dog form by their side. Kevin seemed moved by this and also shares his grandfather’s sentiment. Kevin said that this saying was like a reminder that God does not leave anyone alone.

The context of Kevin’s personal experience with this proverb and its meaning is uniquely appropriate to the larger discussion of the proverb’s meaning. Drunks or homeless people as Kevin mentioned, are often times outcast from the rest of society within our communities and must feel incredibly lonely and perhaps forsaken at times. However, this proverb seems to challenge this very idea of the most outcast and even marginalized members of our communities being completely alone. As the proverb states unequivocally; every drunk has a dog. It is important to note that every drunk is not being followed by a dog or pestered by a dog. They have a dog, a significantly different relationship. This suggests the same kind of relationship anyone else who has a dog might have, drunk or homeless- or not. Dogs as “man’s best friend” offer companionship, comfort, and joy. So, Kevin and his grandfather’s interpretations could be good interpretations of the proverb, because whether or not the dog is divine, the solace it offers could definitely be a reassuring presence in the life of a seemingly otherwise forsaken person.

Proverb

One bird in your hand is better than ten in the sky.

Carlos said he first heard this African Proverb in his English class when they were studying popular wisdom and proverbs from around the world. He said that this proverb in particular struck him because he felt that it had personal significance for him in his own life. He took it to mean that you do not need that many materials, because you should just satisfy yourself with the things that mean the most.

I think that Carlos’s last comment was especially perceptive and insightful in terms of understanding this proverb. The proverb seems to guide you towards cultivating a greater appreciation of what you do have in your pocket, so to speak, at this moment instead of overlooking it in your pursuit for more or something else entirely. It also seems to warn you against missing out on this moment and all the richness that you already possess, whether tangible or not as Carlos suggested. The image of ten birds in the sky emphasizes their physical distance from you, but perhaps also how removed those desires etc. are from you currently. Being able to have one bird in your pocket is a physical, tangible experience that is available to you now that is more real than the birds in the distance growing increasingly smaller against the horizon. This proverb subtly guides you towards a great awareness of your resources and blessings, gratitude and appreciation, and also a firm grounding in what is most real and available to you now.