Author Archives: Peter Park

Chinese Sleep Paralysis Apparitions

This is a story that I heard from a barber when discussing folklore origins. S is a middle aged Chinese woman who used to live in China before immigrating to the United States.

C: My sister used to have pretty bad sleep paralysis when she was little. She got scissor lock, right, so she can’t move, sleep paralysis. She said that she couldn’t see, er, in her head I think she said there was a small girl running around her bed trying to give her an apple.

Me: Huh, an apple?

C: Yeah, like trying to give her an apple. I think her bed was in the center of the room so the girl would run around her bed and try to hand it to her. Another time, my sister used to have a lot of sleep paralysis, and she could only move her eyes. And she said during that time, in like a dark corner, she could see, you know in cartoons like the bad guy when they go Ha Ha Ha (menacingly)? She would see a shadowy figure and she would hear him laughing. After the first few times, I think she got used to it though. Thankfully, I’ve never gotten scissor lock before.

Me: Wow, that is so scaryyy. Ahh. This is kind of weird but do you know if someone has ever died in your house or on the land around you?

C: No, sorry I never heard anything like that before.

Me: All good, I was just wondering. Thank you for your story!

Even though I have heard and read many stories about sleep paralysis demons, I have never heard of an apparition of a little girl with an apple. The contrast between a somewhat innocent-seeming girl and a laughing dark figure is very interesting, though what is more intriguing is that someone could get used to the sleep paralysis demons and the feeling of not being able to move your body while mentally awake. Since Asian countries are more open to the spirits and ancestors than in many western countries, people in these Asian countries are less likely to be frightened by the apparitions and instead see them as some spirits who simply want some company or have some fun.

Birthday Dirge Variation

This is a version of the Birthday Dirge adapted by the family of a close friend. They have been singing it for over two decades, and it is meant to be sung in a somber tone at a largo tempo. The lyrics are as follows:

Grief and sorrow fill the air

People dying everywhere

Happy birthday

Happy birthday

This variation of the birthday dirge is sung much slower than other, more popular renditions of the piece. The family also sings it after the traditional happy birthday song, with the parents leading the pace. This song order really emphasizes the juxtaposition between the dirge, which talks of gloom and despair, and the upbeat celebratory song, and this difference becomes very comical. Though other renditions of the birthday dirge include these lines individually, they are not sung together. As it stands, this is a modification of the song’s most popular versions.


They also sing this song for people outside their family, if they are fortunate enough to spend their birthday week within the family’s home. It is often shocking for people hearing the song for the first time, but it soon becomes a part of the birthday celebration that others start looking forward to. I personally was very bewildered when I first witnessed the birthday dirge performance, as I had never heard of people intentionally speaking of death and sorrow during a birthday. However, I grew to enjoy it and I even participate in singing the dirge when I get the chance.

For alternate versions of the birthday dirge, see:

Brendan, and Brendan. “The Birthday Dirge.” ThereItIs.org, 12 May 2015, https://thereitis.org/the-birthday-dirge/.

“Eyes are High”

This is a proverb that is used primarily by my parents

Original:

눈이 높다

Romanization:

nun-ee nop-da

Transliteration/Translation:

“eyes are high”

Meaning: having high standards or unrealistic expectations

This idiom is used to refer to someone who possesses standards that border on unreasonable. The person who fits this description is someone whose perception rests on a much higher plane (thus, their “eyes are high”). You’ll often find this used in the context of relationships when a person expects far too much from their potential suitor.

A Glitch in the Matrix – Sourceless Light

Context: J is my friend’s father, who works as a dentist. He claims this story happened to him a few years ago when he was in his mid 40s. The topic of living in the Matrix spurred this conversation.

Me: What if we were all living in the Matrix? What if none of this is real and we just respawn when we die?

J: I think you’re actually closer to the truth than you think.

Me: ?? What do you mean? You think we’re living in a matrix?

J: Well, I haven’t experienced anything disappearing or people “glitching”, but I have encountered a light with no source.

Me: Uhhhh what?

J: Ok story time. So I was driving on this highway in the Valley with a friend, right, and it was really late one night. Along the middle were these street lamps that made a pretty noticeable cone of light. Like, they did a good job of lighting up the streets.

Me: Mmhm, I see what you’re saying.

J: Anyways, they were pretty regular, and we didn’t really pay much attention to them. Then we saw a cone of light with no lamp to cast it. Looked EXACTLY like the light from the other street lamps, just being produced by empty air.

Me: That is sooo bizarre. Were you able to investigate it?

J: I wish we had. We easily could have, since there wasn’t anyone else on the road, but we just drove on. We still talk about it sometimes, but we’re still scratching our heads to this day.

Me: Noo I can’t believe you didn’t investigate! The curiosity would’ve killed me. Did you believe in the Matrix before this?

J: No, I didn’t really know that people actually believed in it. I just thought it was a movie. After seeing that, though, I looked into it more and was kind of surprised to find more stories like mine.

Me: Do you actually believe those stories now? That we could actually be living in a matrix?

J: Well, they’re certainly more believable now hahaa. If it wasn’t a “glitch”, I don’t know what it would be. Maybe our eyes were just tired but that was really quite strange.

Me: Wow, thank you so much for this story!

The concept of living in a simulation, or simulation hypothesis, is not new, with roots dating back to the ancient Greeks or Indian philosophers. However, the popularity of movies such as The Matrix and Inception brought the idea into the mainstream. Personally, I do not believe that we live in the Matrix, although stories like these are very intriguing, since they remind us that there are still so many things that we don’t understand about our universe. Though I have read stories about such “glitches” online, with the most popular ones being about surviving a supposedly fatal accident unscathed, this was my first time hearing about a glitch through someone that I know. It was definitely very confusing and left me with many questions about the world and what I have been taught. Although I have not experienced any glitches myself, hearing this story led me to become more open to other ways of interpreting the world.

Why Chinese People Have Short Names

This is a story that I heard from a barber when discussing folklore origins. S is a middle aged Chinese woman who used to live in China before immigrating to the United States.

S: There was one about a boy with a super long name who fell down a well and almost died because his name was too long. I think his name was “Tiki-tiki-tembo-no-sar-embo-charri-barri-boochi-pip-perry-pembo” or something like that. It was Chinese.. custom to say the full name of a firstborn child. So the boy with the long name had a brother with a short name, and they were playing next to a well by their house. The younger brother fell into the well, so the older brother ran to their mom and said Chang fell into the well! Oh, and Chang was the name of the younger brother.

Me: Oh nooo! Were they able to save him?

S: Yes! They got a ladder to help Chang climb out of the well right away and he was just fine. Then another day, the two brothers were playing next to the well again when this time it was the older brother who fell!

Me: (groans) come on guys, do better. Silly little kids!

S: So this time, Chang runs to his mom and tries to tell her that Tiki-tiki-tembo-no-sar-embo-charri-barri-boochi-pip-perry-pembo fell into the well. But since he ran there, he was so out of breath that he could only say tiki-tiki-tembo… before running out of breath. His mom was so intent on respecting her first-born son’s name that she would not listen until he was able to say (inhales largely) Tiki-tiki-tembo-no-sar-embo-charri-barri-boochi-pip-perry-pembo. Whew! That was hard hahha.

Me: (trying to say it with her) Tiki-tiki-tembo-no-sar-embo-charri-barii-boochi alala blehhh. I couldn’t imagine having a name that long. That must suck!

S: Yeah anyways, they finally got the ladder after Chang was able to pronounce his brother’s name, but he was basically almost drowned by this point. They were able to save him, but it took him a long time to recover. And that’s why Chinese people have short names!

Me: Wow, what a cool tale! I hope that the mom learned her lesson, that could’ve ended really badly.