Author Archives: Kevin Comartin

Earwick, Nosepick, Facelick

Earwick, Nosepick, Facelick

It’s a game the source’s mother, used to play with her, her brother and her sister. The rules of the game are as follows: “two people race to see who can complete three tasks first. They have to stick their finger in the other person’s ear and nose, and then lick their face. The game can be started by either person at any time.”

When the source and her siblings were kids, they thought it was just a game, but when they were older, their mother explained that it wasn’t really a game at all. It turns out she was testing for cystic fibrosis. She was really only trying to lick their faces, and if it tasted salty it would mean they had cystic fibrosis. Healthy kids are supposed to taste like flour.

The source’s mother invented the game so her kids wouldn’t run away every time she tried to test them. She added the steps of picking the nose and ear because it made the source and her siblings laugh.

 

I believe that while the game started as a way to practice a folk medicinal test, the reason why it caught on in the family, and why they still occasionally play it now is because it is a way for the family to playfully get close to each other. All of the actions performed in the game are fairly intimate gestures, and at the heart it’s a way for the family to stay close.

Who’s Got the Rock?

Who’s Got the Rock?

Is a game the source learned at her high school near Augusta, Georgia. Apparently the game was originated by her Latin class, and is still played at the school to this day.

“Our teacher wasn’t very aware of what was going on at most times, so while she would lecture us in the front of the class we’d play this game. Basically someone would just wrap a piece of paper around any solid object they had. I think the original rock was an empty ink cartridge for a printer, but sometimes people would use tennis balls or scotch tape dispensers wrapped in paper. There was always one rock per day at least and people would just throw it from one person to the next to see who could throw it at the most daring time and not get caught. If Ms. Grimaude ever caught anyone and took the rock away, everyone would try to determine who had made the next rock. We had a chant we’d do—well I’m not sure it was a chant, but we’d do that thing where you shout but are also whispering but everyone would say it at different times. Once the first rock of the day was thrown we’d say “who’s got the rock?!” until someone threw the next rock. The funny thing was, we didn’t have that many rocks taken away the whole year. She never really caught us except a few times so much of the time when we would say “who’s got the rock” it was more of a dare for whoever had it to throw it at that exact moment. Ultimately it got out of hand with my class and people started throwing eggs and stuff. My brother though, who is 3 years younger than me told me that they still were playing that game in Latin class when he was there, which made me happy that we had created a game that lived on at the school.”

 

This game is interesting to me because there doesn’t seem to be any particular point to it. There’s never any winner or goal to the game, except to unite the class against the teacher. It’s also a rite of passage for Latin students at the school, the game continues to this day because if you haven’t played Who’s Got the Rock?, you clearly weren’t part of the Latin program.

Kutchky’s Army

The source’s mother grew up in Oak Park, Illinois, in a predominantly Italian neighborhood. Most of the families on her street didn’t have more than three children.

When she was growing up, her mother and a lot of the other people in the neighborhood had a saying, if they have a lot of something, they would say they have enough for Kutchky’s Army. So if they had a lot of food, for example, they’d say “We have enough food to feed Kutchky’s Army.” Growing up, the source’s mother always assumed it was a reference to a real army in a war.

However, it was really a reference to the one Polish family on the block that had at least ten children.

Now, neither the source, nor the mother live in Chicago, but its been adopted as a common saying inside the family, and their friends from back home in Chicago.

 

Chicago has been, and still is one of the most segregated cities in the country. I think the saying reflects the tension between established ethnic groups in certain neighborhoods, and newcomers from different ethnic backgrounds. The saying probably started as a way for the established Italian families in the neighborhood to playfully separate themselves from the Kutchky’s, who they probably saw as Polish interlopers.

J Cup

Jew Cup, a.k.a. J Cup is a drinking game for four players, split into teams of two.

The source learned the game when he first came to USC. It was popular among the upperclassmen in the School of Theatre. He learned it from his older brother, who was a senior at USC when the source arrived. The exact origins of the game are unclear and contested, but it is agreed that it was invented by a group of guys who graduated in 2008. They lived in the so called “Raymond House”, which was a popular hang out for theatre students before the source came to USC. The game was passed down through the students in the BFA Acting program, but has started dying out. To the best of the source’s knowledge, J Cup has not been played on USC campus in at least two years, but may still be played by the originators elsewhere.

J Cup is an amalgamation of many popular drinking games, especially beer pong, and has complex rules. It is often referred to as “more of a drinking carnival than a drinking game.”

Set Up:

Like beer pong, J Cup is played on a table with cups and ping pong balls, but the set up is entirely different. In the center of the table is a large cup, filled with beer. This cup surrounded by smaller plastic cups, also filled with beer, in the shape of a Star of David, hence the game’s moniker: Jew Cup. On either side of the table there are two plastic cups (a total of four), filled with beer. On the ends of the table, each team has a wash cup filled with water for rinsing the ping pong balls, behind these each team has a crushed beer can on the very edge of the table.

Play:

The teams take shots to determine who goes first, the first team to sink a ball in any cup in the middle goes first. A winning team from the previous round always shoots first.

The teams then take turns trying to sink the ball in the center cups. If a ball lands in any of the cups making up the Star of David, the other team has to drink the content of that cup, and place it in a stack on the left side of the table. If both players on one team make shots, they get to throw again. If they make it into the same cup, they get the balls back, and the other team has to drink three cups. This is where the similarities with beer pong end.

If a player sinks a ball in the big, center cup, both teams run to the side of the table to their right, and play flip cup, another popular drinking game, with the cups on the sides. The team that loses flip cup must consume two cups from the Star of David, chosen by the winning team.

If a player sinks a ball in the opposing team’s wash cup, both team members must shotgun a beer. The rules for the crushed beer can behind the wash cup are complicated. Instead of trying to sink a ball in a cup, a player can attempt to knock the opposing team’s beer can off the table. If they succeed and the can hits the floor, the opposing team members must both take a shot of whiskey. If, however, a player hits the beer can, but the opposing team catches the can before it hits the floor, the throwing team must each take a shot of whiskey.

Play is continued until all of the cups in the Star of David have been consumed. The team with the fewest empty cups in their stack are declared the winners, and hold the table until they lose to a new team.

 

The game to me is interesting, because the name could be construed as anti-Semitic, but other than the Star of David in the center of the cup, the game has absolutely nothing to do with Jewish people. I think its more of a reflection of the kids who lived in the Raymond House, and their desire to have a unique house game, that would draw people to parties. It must have worked too, because School of Theatre alumni from that time often recall fond memories from parties at Raymond House.

The Blowjob Frog

The source was told the following joke by an Irishman, while he was on a family vacation in Martinique in the Caribbean. He believes it has origins in Ireland. He generally only tells this joke when he’s in a group of other men, he would only tell it in the company of women if multiple people were sharing dirty jokes.

The Blowjob Frog

A wife is out looking for an anniversary present for her husband. She’s walking by various stores looking in shop windows for something he’s really going to like, but she’s having trouble finding anything, right? But then she walks past a pet shop, and there’s a sign out front that says: ‘Blowjob Frogs, 5$’.

So she goes into the shop, and says to the guy who runs it, “Blowjob Frogs?” And he says, “Blowjob Frogs”. She asks what they do, and he tells her its pretty self explanatory, right? They give blowjobs. So she thinks its funny and that her husband will like it, so she buys it for him.

That night the husband and wife have a lovely, romantic dinner at their home. And they exchange presents. He opens his and he’s surprised. “A frog?” he asks, “A blowjob frog” she replies. They laugh, and put the frog in a box with some water so it’ll be alright until they figure out what to do with it in the morning. And they spend a passionate night together in the bedroom, best sex they’ve had in years.

She wakes up in the middle of the night, and she sees that the bed is empty, the husband’s gone, right? Then she hears the clattering of pots and pans in the kitchen. So she gets up to investigate, and when she gets into the kitchen, she finds her husband in there, with the blowjob frog on the counter.

So she says, “What are you doing in here?”

And then he says, “If I can teach this frog how to cook, your ass is outta here!”

 

This joke is funny on several levels. First it plays on the common husband/wife stereotypes, and implies that a man really only keeps a woman around for home cooked meals and blowjobs. Also, bestiality is definitely a major taboo, and freaks a lot of people out, so the joke allows people to discuss it. It would also make sense if the joke really does have Irish origins, because it might be more acceptable there than in America, which still tends to be fairly Puritan, and uncomfortable with sex.