Tag Archives: wedding

Armenian Wedding Money Dance

Context: Matrimony is a special liminal, or transitional, period in a person’s life. In some cultures it marks the transition from a woman being owned by her father to owned by her husband. In some it marks the beginning of a monetary relationship between two families, like a mutual advancement in social class. Regardless, for cultures that have a tradition about the liminal event of marriage, most often the tradition is in regards to future prosperity, success, or fertility. Here, informant GG explains the Armenian wedding traditions, shedding light on similarities between them and the western traditions.

Main Text: Transcript:

GG: Armenian weddings are known to be really over the top. Parents, relatives, family- they really spare no expense in going all out with like the food, the entertainment…  One tradition is that the bride and groom, they get together… and then people will gather around and they’ll throw stacks of money into the air. It’s just like a constant stream of people… usually it’s the males of the families, and they’ll come up and they throw like a hundred bucks worth of ones in the air and it’s like flowing down. They create a circle where they throw it from all these different angles, and it’s supposed to signify wealth and abundance at the start of the marriage, and it gets intense sometimes. There’ll be like piles of cash on the floor or like little kids running around trying to grab some. Some people need… big ‘ol brooms by the end to sweep all the money up. 

HR: That’s amazing, that sounds hilarious! [Laughs] So lots of western traditions have wedding gifts. Is that like in lieu of a wedding gift, people just instead walk up and throw wads of cash at the bride and groom?

GG: They still do give gifts, but they’re not as big as in the west.

I continued to speak with GG about this tradition and found that he’d been apart of many money dances at Armenian weddings, not as the thrower or the groom but as a kid, running in and trying to snag money for himself! 

Thoughts: I think that the nature of liminal periods includes some kind of uncertainty about the future. When one makes the transition from one stage in life to another, they often turn to traditions regarding luck or guidance. The transition from single to married carries plenty of uncertainty, so the Armenian Money Dance tradition is a way of wishing the newly-weds monetary luck in the coming years. 

Money Dance, Nigerian Wedding Folk Custom

“At weddings in our family and I know in most Nigerian weddings we throw large amounts of money at everyone it’s not even the married couple, literally everyone gets money thrown at them. We typically all stand in a circle and the elder members of the family will sometimes throw thousands of dollars each in the middle with bills ranging from singles to ten’s. My family calls it the money dance but I know some call it money spraying. This is pretty much to symbolize a showering of happiness and good fortune in their future lives together. It also shows how much the group cares for each other.”

Context:

Money throwing is pretty common at Nigerian weddings. My informant learned this from going to weddings in his family as a kid and young adult. My informant was born in Philadelphia but his parents moved from Nigeria with other family members and brought many of the customs with them, including this one. He said it his favorite part of going because who doesn’t love traditions that involve free money. 

Analysis:

Hearing this made me really want to implement this tradition in all weddings. It is a super cool Nigerian tradition that I had never heard being practiced in any other culture. I find it fascinating that so many different countries and cultures have very unique traditions when it comes to a wedding.

The Three Weddings- Nigeria

“The first one is the traditional one with a ceremony where everyone is dressed up with a lot of wine, then there is the official one in the church that’s recognized by law, and the third one is the celebratory feast. Nigerian weddings are no normal one and done, these ceremonies can go on for a long time over a whole week. When you’re invited to a Nigerian wedding plan on blocking out your whole week for this party. The feast is the best out of the three, the grandmas make some goooood Nigerian food man, I’ve been to three weddings and have never been more full in my life than that. The three weddings are fun but besides the feast, the other two can get extremely boring.”

Context:

The informant gives a recount of his personal experience at a 3-part Nigerian wedding that he has been to a few times. 

Analysis

My informant gives me a retelling of his favorite part of the Nigerian 3-day wedding process. I found it interesting but understandable how he, along with most young people, would enjoy eating the most. It is an interesting practice because the weddings I have been to are a one-day celebration that consists of a ceremony and then dinner. 

American Wedding Pranks

I: Informant, M: Me

I: A common tradition amongst most groomsmen, is to goof on the groomsmen [correction: meant groom]. To do some kind of practical joke. It’s usually done  the night before, sometimes its during the reception, sometimes its done right before they get married. Like when I married [name blanked for privacy]

M: yeah

I: [name blanked for privacy] My best man and I drank two very large tequila shots together toasting the end of my single life and beginning of my new wonderful life and he asked me as we did the shot are you sure you want to get married *laughs*.

…. What we did for [blanked name- will use Pedro] was unusual. Pedro, the night before I got ahold of his shoes. And when you go infringe of a Catholic Church to get married sometimes you face with the priest in between you.

….. So I was sitting next to [bride’s] grandparents who were extremely, extremely conservative and we are in the front row, the second row watching them get married. Now normally they sit like this. But what Pedro and [Bride] were doing is the were walking up to the alter and getting on their knee in front of G-d and in front of the priest and when he got on his knees, his shoes, his heels would be up and the bottoms of his shoes would be showing and of course the shoes are brand new. So I wrote in black permanent marker on the bottom of his shoes, HELP on the left shoe and ME on the right shoe and it was witnessed for all to see. Pedro thought it was funny as hell. I assure you that the bride’s parents thought it was anything but.

Context: This informant has not only been married and experienced the wedding pranks/jokes, but has also participated in creating one when he was a groomsman.

Analysis: The wedding in America represents the transition from childhood and adulthood. Thus, while in the midst of the ceremony or right before, the ‘groom/bride’ is in this liminal place where he/she isn’t quite married, but isn’t quite just an engaged couple anymore. They are in the process of taking on a new identity as married adults. Pranks/joke/riddles and various other traditions are common in other liminal states and serve to test you, prepare you, and help you transition into ease your new identity, married adulthood in this case. Typically pranks/jokes have to be done by somebody close to the person being pranked or else it is no longer considered well-intended and all in good fun, but can be upsetting and discomforting if someone you aren’t close with pranks/jokes you. It’s as if they haven’t earned the right to set things slightly awry. That’s why, it makes perfect sense that the groomsmen would play pranks/jokes on the groom given those are typically some of the closest guys to him in his life.

Indian Wedding Traditions – Stealing Shoes

Background: 
My informant, NS, is an eighteen year old student at Tufts University. She was born and raised in Southern California. Her mother was born and raised in the Philippines, and her father is Indian but grew up in Scotland and Southern California. While her mother is the only member of her family to have moved away from the Philippines, much of her father’s family, including his father, siblings, and nieces and nephews, are also in Southern California, meaning lots of family time between NS and her extended family, especially her cousins. Her father’s side of the family continues many traditional Indian and Hindu practices in day to day life, and NS is also greatly influenced by her heritage.  (I’ll be referring to myself as SW in the actual performance).

Performance:
NS: At Indian weddings, the youngest bridesmaid..ok so..have you ever been to an Indian wedding?

SW: Nope.

NS: Oh. Well the bride and groom…they do a thing where they walk around a fire 7 times, and each time represents, like, the first one might be commitment, or the second one represents love. They walk around 7 times, and then the youngest bridesmaid will steal the shoes from the groom-

SW: The groom’s shoes?

NS: Yeah, so she steals the groom’s shoes, and it’s always expected, like, Indian men will take out cash, like over $100, before their wedding day because they know they have to pay for their shoes back. And basically, it’s like a sign of wealth. The groom shows that he has the money to buy his shoes back, even if he doesn’t need to. It’s supposed to be, like, a way of showing that he can support his wife and family, financially. 

Thoughts: 
I’ve never been to a wedding before, and talking to NS, my best friend, always makes me want to go to one, especially an Indian wedding. They seem to be a big affair, with hundreds of people there, including extended family and friends. Walking around the fire reminds me of a more symbolic way of reading out your vows, which I like. NS also mentioned that she’s been to a few weddings where her Indian cousins marry someone who is not Indian, and because they’re not Indian, they don’t quite get all the Indian traditions that make up the wedding. So NS, often being the youngest bridesmaid (as she is the youngest cousin), has dealt with the family of the groom being less than understanding. She’s had people she hardly knows get angry with her and tell her to return the shoes, or the groom will give her $10, clearly not understanding the significance of the custom. It makes me sad that so many people won’t even consider trying to understand a culture different from their own.