Well this was in Wisconsin… me and and all my sisters went to the bar… it’s called Jacobi’s now. What was it called then?

Informant 2 (her husband, Howard, age 84)- Hiawatha.

Right so the Hiawatha, then. And so my sister, Janet, and my sister, Rita, went to the bar.

The boys, Howard and Dennis, were out fishing. So we decided to go down to the Hiawatha a drink.

Well, the boys came back and we’d already come back from the bar and they felt bad for leaving us all alone in the cabin all night while they were out having fun and fishing. And they decided to be nice and take us to get a drink and we said sure… we’d already gone but we didn’t say anything.

But when we got back to the Hiawatha, the bartender (laughing), the bartender says, “Are you girls here AGAIN?!”

context: 

The informants, Grandma, and with a little help with name recognition from Papa, told me this story over the phone, but it was certainly not the first time I’d heard it. Typically, Papa tells it once or twice a summer when our whole family returns to those cabins in Wisconsin whenever we go to that bar/restaurant, now called Jacobi’s. They both find it really funny and don’t try to hide it.

thoughts:

I think this story has been told and retold because it is sort of out of character for Grandma to hide the truth or bend it from Papa and the fact that the bartender blew her cover makes it even better. Both of them have told it on multiple occasions and knowing them, I’m sure they’ve told it to a number of waiters and bartenders upon returning to that establishment. They’re very friendly in that way.

So, as you know, when I was a kid, we moved from the south side to Palos Park. And outside some bullies in the neighborhood…uh, chased me home.

And Aunt Pat was standing by the window and she looked outside and saw the bullies chasing me. So she ran and grabbed my mom’s shelayley, which is like this Irish cane…I don’t know how to spell it but you can just look it up…

And she just chased after these guys! And they ran away! They thought they were real tough and then Aunt Pat, you know, who’s a woman, just made them run away.

Why do we tell and retell this story?

Just, you know, to show, you know, uh that to tell a story about Aunt Pat. And show how she, you know, protected her brother. Good over evil, you know, that kind of thing.

context:

I went home this year for Easter. The informant, my dad, or one of his siblings tells this story at most family parties. They used to tell it with an umbrella as the weapon of fear but Aunt Pat changed it to shelayley. He told this to me one-on-one, otherwise there probably would be a bit more flare to it, if his siblings contributed.

thoughts:

It’s funny that his interpretation of why we tell and retell it is because it shows how good triumphs over evil. I personally think it is more to paint his sister as a heroine, especially when she is down. All of the cousins know it and can and do tell it.

You know this story. I don’t get what the point of this is.

I can’t collect folklore from myself.

Can you just have Vince tell it?

I did but it will be cool to have two versions to compare. Please!

Okay. So this is the story of Dad and Dunkin Donuts. So Dad was studying and Dunkin Donuts was robbed…at gunpoint. And the cops came in and asked him, “What happened. What did the guy look like?” and he didn’t know. Dad didn’t even notice the entire thing happening.

Why do you think we tell this tale so often?

‘Cus it’s funny… you should ask Vince to tell you the story of when Frankie pooped on the roof.

Yeah, maybe. Thanks!

Context:

I went home for Easter this year, where my younger brother still lives because he is in high school. In a one-on-one, obviously not super stimulating conversation with my younger brother, he told this family tale. There is another version of this same tale with a bit more to it also in this folklore collection told completely separately by my older brother.

Thoughts:

It would be interesting to have another version of this tale by the same informant but in a good mood.

Okay, alright,okay…um it’s strange to just randomly start from the beginning. But, okay, yeah, we were all at Morris like every summer. And, uh, one group decides to get in a a canoe and just sort of leaves us. And yeah (laughs), um, meanwhile four of us – Brit, me, you, and Nicole- are um, fucking around, and trying to figure out the paddle boat. And that took a long time.

Yeah and we had a big fight over who was well-equipped to paddle. And I definitely pulled some bullshit like having a skating thing the next day and guilted Brittany or you into it. I’m sure Nicole was in the back with me. And we were just telling you how wonderful you were for paddling, stroking your egos.

And uh we didn’t know which way the canoe went, there’s kind of a fork in it so we just picked a route and start going down it, you know, slowly but surely… and uh eventually at the fork um we start shouting for the canoe because you know, that’s our only way of dealing with things.

And as we’re sort of paddling, this one boat keeps passing us. And it’s got a man, who’s I guess 60 years old…and a young man with him who’s probably like 20.  So the first time, it’s common courtesy on the water, to wave to people and so we uh, we did. People are more friendly on the water, I think.

And then a couple minutes later, they pass again and so we wave again. And we’re thinking that it was kind of weird, like they kept smiling at us…pretty strangely.

And eventually, you know, we’re just stagnant. People are yelling at each other, probably Nicole was, even though she was in back. And eventually, uh that same boat came back and slows down and is just coasting past us.

And we’re thinking, “Oh God.” and the old man goes “Do you guys need help?” or something but we were all like “No, no, we’re fine, no problem, no, no.” and then the next thing you know they were circling us!

And we are feeling so vulnerable and we couldn’t even paddle away if we wanted to like we didn’t know how.

And the 20-year old guy takes out a rope and just starts like lassoing in the air. And I think we were all halfway laughing and halfway panicking. Just like, “Is he going to lasso us?”

And he passes the lasso to I guess his father and he fucking dives into the black water like the depths of this lake!

And we’re just sitting there and call out but don’t see him. Where is he? Where is he? And then he just puts his arms over the boat! And looks at us with this like grin on his face and goes (in a deep southern accent) “Y’all ever been tipped?” and we all look at each other and we’re not sure, just a mix between laughing and screaming.

But because we’re all pathologically polite from our Catholic school upbringing we’re just like “No, no, no, it’s fine.” But I feel like we need to get out of there.

And I remember you, (the collector), you were just laughing your head off, your turkey cackle laugh, and we are not moving and so I yelled at you and I just go, “Grace, FUCKING PADDLE!” (laughs).

But you don’t. And Brittany is sitting in this awkward position in the front and she’s not paddling either and I go “Brit what are you doing?” and that’s when I realize she peed herself. Are you kidding me?! And she gives me this like impassioned plea look she does sometimes and goes “Katie. I can’t. No.”

So I tell her to get out of the way and switch spots with her… and I had to sit in this girl’s PISS and…’cus she couldn’t move… and I paddled away from those fuckers (laughs a lot).

Then, we get back to the, um, the shore. And of course, our parents are there. We’re like strangely close to our parents… anyway, yeah, and we’re trying to tell them what happened and just laughing and freaking out.  And they just shrugged it off as if it were nothing! And we were all shocked at this, but eventually let it go.

So I guess all this was, Morris 2010? I think, not sure. But fast forward to 2013 or 2014, I feel like ’14, and yeah, so last summer, and we’re there and Brit’s uncle takes us for a pontoon ride and we bring it up because you know, we tell this story any chance we get, and he just looks up at us and knew who we were talking about. Like “Bob and Joe?” or I don’t remember their names but you know and he says “Keep your voice down…those guys cause a lot of trouble on this lake.”

And apparently, he tells us that they make their money, based on suing other people. And so now the son in estranged from his father and the father…(very loudly, animatedly) the father faced criminal charges for smacking someone in the head with a SHOVEL!!

Collector: When was the first time you told this story or it was told?

The second we got back to shore.

Why do you retell it?

Um… I think that uh, we retell it a lot because it is so characteristic of our friends to get into shit like that…and our reaction were so funny. Panic or laugh? And the fact that we um, we just really love that “Y’all ever been tipped?” line, definitely the climax of the story. It’s just shocking someone actually said that… he definitely said “y’all” but not sure if he was that Southern, now that I think about it.

Also our friends tend to embellish and you know, sensationalize, but this is fucking true.

After all these years, we realized we were in serious danger, like hit your head with a shovel kind of danger!

Context of the Performance: 

I asked the informant if she would tell this story specifically so we could compare with the Circling Fools tale previously posted, as told by another informant, Brittany. This was the first time she had told it individually, as it is generally a group performance, but this time she told it directly to the collector. The “you” she refers to is the collector, once again in this case, because she told it to me, a close friend.

My Thoughts on this Piece:

In both tales, (Circling Fools and Circling Fools, Version 2) the basic plot points are the same but some key details change, which is interesting and sort of speaks to the informant’s worldview. As mentioned in the first version of this tale, typically it is told by several people at once, with lots of interruptions so both informants felt odd telling it by themselves directly to one single person.

Okay, so Dad was studying for the BAR exam. And you know, he’s a, uh, very attentive, very focused studier.  He didn’t even listen to music. Or, I don’t think he did.

And, anyway, he was studying at a Dunkin Donuts and the store was robbed at gunpoint while he was there studying. No shots were fired or anything, but there was, uh, yelling and screaming and everything.

So the police arrived. And they, uh, came up to Dad and asked him what he saw, like could he identify the guy, and he hadn’t even noticed the store had been robbed (laughs).

Collector: Do you remember who first told you this story?

I think Mom did.

When?

I don’t know. A long time ago. And she tells it all the time. The first time I was probably less than ten years old.

What context does she tell it in?

I don’t know a humorous one? She tells it to make fun of Dad.

Have you told it to anyone. Like, besides right now?

Yeah.. a few people. Like friends who are possibly going to take the BAR or if people are talking about how they don’t know how people can study in Starbucks I say yeah, I agree, I don’t like studying near noise either, but my dad can study anywhere and then I tell them.

Why do we retell it?

Cuz it’s funny.

Does it change?

Not really. For the most part it stays the same. Dad doesn’t really ever tell it himself, Mom likes to tell it. She likes to point out, you know, his work ethic and also his inattention to some things.

Context of the Performance:

This is a Carballo family classic tale and as the informant mentioned, it has been told dozens of times. The informant told it when I asked him about his favorite family stories that we tell a lot. I was the only one listening when he told it.

Collector’s Thoughts on the Piece:

It is interesting, as the informant points out, how the subject of the tale never tells this story, though he must have told it at least once because the main reteller was not there to witness it. It shows how a particular tale can mean so much to a family and sort of define how they see a certain family member. I have also heard it told in the context of justifying Dad completely tuning out a conversation or neglecting a request, sort of to demonstrate that he actually may not have heard.