Tag Archives: wedding

“Something Blue

Interviewer: “Can you please repeat what you just told me, because it is a great example of a ritual and folk tradition!”

OB: “In my Family, the “something blue” in wedding superstition has to be a blue thread sewn into the hem of the dress in the shape of an anchor. It is supposed to keep the marriage grounded, and supposedly keeps the couple together.

Context: OB’s cousin is getting married in the summer, and she wanted all her family members to sew blue anchors into the hem of their suits. He has learned this tradition for as long as he can remember in his family, however he has never participated himself because it is typically the bride. he is a gay male, and wants to eventually use the tradition in his suit when he gets married, carrying on the tradition in his own way.

Analysis: This is a great example of how a very broad and popularized tradition is localized into a more narrow specific familial tradition. This is an example of material culture, in which an object is representative of a folk belief of a tradition. This could be perceived as a ritual of intensification as it strengthens the bond between romantic partners as well as their families.

Wedding Tradition: The Water Pot

Text: 

Informant: “So one of the traditions that we have during weddings is that woman go and they get a pot, and they grab get water from the holiest river in India and this well and you fill it into this pot. And when it’s time for the bride and groom to get married, after they get married, the woman, um, kind of stands for a very long time with this pot on her head. It’s like this very pure water and the bride and groom’s like families like negotiate with time or how long to stand with this pot on her head. It’s usually like a symbol of like honors as well to be standing there. You know, it doesn’t sound like that because like everyone else is dancing and whatnot, but I think my mother stood for like 6 hours.” 

Interviewer: “What’s an average time?”

Informant: “Average. I would say at a recent, um, sort of, like, I think maybe like a year ago, 2 or 3 hours. I definitely think that longer you are back in time, it’s more like like the definitely like a rite of passage and this feeling of like you’re about to get married and you basically afterwards when the woman is getting down from standing, usually what will happen is like someone from the bride’s family will be like, no, we’re just not gonna let her go just that easily, so they like demand money from the groom side of the family. So they like kind of shower her with money as she like steps down and takes this pot off her head. And then the water, that’s like this really holy entire water, is later on, like supposed to be, um, kind of like splashed at the house of the new couple to like show that you’re getting brought a lot of this like good energy, I guess.”

Context: The Informant is from Coorg, India. Their ethnicity is called Coorgi or Kodava and they speak Kodavathuk (it is a South Indian Dravidian language). Weddings last three days and this is a pre-wedding ritual. The Informant also mentioned that there they don’t use caste systems but do have a huge emphasis on ancestors. 

Analysis: In this we see a high context marriage ritual that is repeated through multiple generations. According to Van Gennep, rites of passage have three stages, separation (preliminal), transition (liminal), and reincorporation (postliminal). In this ritual, the separation comes when the bride puts the pot on her head, entering into a state of semi vulnerability and trial, liminality, holding a pot of water on your head is not necessarily stable which clearly signifies a transition period. Then the reincorporation stage is where she steps down and can take off the pot of water, interestingly this can be postponed, holding the bride in this state of liminality and in between to demand a price from the groom’s family, though seemingly in the interest of the bride. Many wedding rituals or traditions are a test to see if you are ready for marriage and this one is no different. The purity or holiness of the water invokes the idea of virginity going into marriage. Holding the water on the bride’s head could also be seen as a metaphor for pregnancy. The long duration of the ritual, the instability of holding water on one’s head, and the symbolism of it being literal water, a woom, might be a nonliteral test to see if the bride can carry a child to term. In this ritual we can also clearly see the remnants of the transactional nature that marriage has traditionally held in the past in a patriarchal society. The woman is the one who being put in this liminal state while the families are negotiating on her behalf how long this ritual will take place. This is even more firmly cemented when the brides family demands money before she can step down, before they will hand her over, interestingly a subversion of the dowry system which usually has the money going the opposite way. 

Filipino Wedding Cord

Age: 35
Occupation: Nurse
Residence: Yorba Linda, CA
Language: English

Text

“When I got married, I included the Filipino wedding cord ritual. Not everyone at the wedding had heard of it, so I made sure we included a note in the program and had the officiant explain it too. It’s one of the traditional wedding customs in Filipino Catholic ceremonies, along with the veil and coins rituals.

The cord, or yugal, is typically a large decorative loop; it is usually made of silk or a rosary and shaped into a figure eight. This shape symbolizes infinity, endless love, and commitment. During the ceremony, two people called cord sponsors, who are usually a married couple chosen by the bride and groom, to drape the cord over the couple’s shoulders. 

One loop goes around the groom and the other around the bride. Then it rests gently across both of us, physically connecting us.

This is done after the vows and rings. It’s used to represent unity and the idea from that moment forward, we’re bound together not just legally or emotionally but also spiritually and communally too. 

In traditional Filipino culture, marriage isn’t just about the two people. It is also about the families, community, and even the ancestors who came before. The yugal is a visual symbol of that commitment. It says: we’re in this together, and we’re surrounded by support.”

Context

This narrative was shared by a Filipino American woman based in Southern California who recently got married and chose to include the yugal (wedding cord) ritual as a part of he wedding ceremony. The informant is second-generation, with her parents who immigrated from the Philippines. She explains that while she grew up seeing photos and hearing about traditional Filipino Catholic wedding customs, this was her first time directly participating in the ritual. She saw it as a meaningful way to connect with her cultural heritage and to educate non-Filipino guests attending her wedding.

She chose to have the officiant explain the ritual aloud during the ceremony and also included a brief description in the wedding program, since many guests were unfamiliar with Filipino customs. Her interpretation of the ritual highlights the spiritual, communal, and intergenerational dimensions of Filipino marriage traditions. To her, the yugal represents more than a decorative act. It visually affirms the idea that marriage is a bond supported by family, faith, and history.

My interpretation

The Filipino wedding cord ritual, also known as the yugal, is a traditional practice commonly performed during Filipino Catholic weddings. It is one of three primary unity rituals, alongside the veil and coin ceremonies, that serve as material and symbolic expressions of marriage as a sacred, communal, and culturally grounded institution. 

The yugal ritual is best understood as a life-cycle ritual and a form of performative tradition. It marks a moment of transition in the couple’s identity, not only as individuals becoming legally married, but as members of a broader cultural and familial system. Rituals like these are symbolically special acts that represent continuity with the past while actively shaping present social identity. In this way, the wedding cord ritual is not just decorative since it functions as a symbolic performance of cultural values, particularly those around unity, family, commitment, and faith.

The yugal also demonstrates the vernacular dimensions of religion. While it is part of Catholic wedding ceremonies, it is not a universal church practice and is instead deeply embedded in Filipino cultural contexts. It shows how religious expression can be shaped by folk practices passed down through community knowledge, rather than dictated by official religious institutions. This aligns with folklorist definitions of vernacular religion, which is a lived religious experience expressed through tradition, objects, and ritual enacted by ordinary people.

The cord ritual is also an example of intangible cultural heritage (ICH,) which is a form of tradition that is not a fixed artifact but a recurring, dynamic practice. Its meaning is carried through action, symbolism, and intergenerational participation rather than text or formal canon. However, as it becomes more frequently included in diasporic weddings (in this case, a Filipino American wedding), it also raises questions about heritage vs folklore. When the ritual is scripted into programs or explained to unfamiliar audiences, it edges closer to heritagization.

“Sukob” – Filipino Wedding Superstition

Nationality: Filipino
Age: 51
Occupation: Software Engineer
Residence: Naperville, IL
Language: English

Text:

Sukob is the belief that siblings should not have their weddings within the same calendar year. It’s also believed that the older sibling should get married first.

Context:

The performer grew up in the Philippines with many siblings who were born at similar times as one another. He has also been married and made sure to not to have his marriage within the same time as his siblings. His marriage has been going strong for 30 years so far.

“So it’s not competing with progress or prosperity and benefits or well-wishes. It’s like a known information like everybody knows it. Especially if you and your siblings are in the same age range, they will normally check first who is older and work with the other siblings for the dates. For example, Tito A got engaged the same year but Tito A gave way to Tito R and waited another year to get married. It’s a practicality thing. It’s also the superstition that the benefits will compete for the rest of your marriage.”

Analysis:

Filipinos are extremely superstitious with many believing that life events carry energetic, or spiritual, weight. To ensure a strong, hormonious, and propserous foundation for their lives, they must set themselves up well for life events. Apart from birth and death, marriage is the only other universal life event that is celebrated cross-culturally, putting a lot of weight on how the event occurs and how important it is in one’s life. Marriage, in particular, holds profound cultural significance as one of the few universal rites of passage celebrated across societies and is treated with a lot of intention. In Filipino culture, where family unity and respect are paramount, avoiding the overlap of weddings within the same family is seen not only as a way to prevent misfortune, but also as a gesture of deference. It ensures that each family member’s major life moment is honored without being overshadowed.

Additionally, “Sukob” superstition has risen in popularity due to the Filipino horror film Sukob which features a couple breaking this rule and the terrifying, dramaticized “karma” that ensued. Cementing a negative perception of Sukob in pop culture has lead to amplified anxieties around violating traditonal norms. Filipinos are especially superstitious due to many of them adhering to Cathiolisism. In a predominantly Catholic society where religious doctrine and folk beliefs often intertwine, the combination of spiritual caution and cinematic storytelling has reinforced the fear and observance of Sukob.

A Cameroonian Union

Nationality: American/Cameroonian
Age: 19
Occupation: Student
Residence: Arlington, Virginia
Language: English

TEXT: “When my cousin proposed to his now-wife, he had to follow a tradition that’s been in my family for generations. He needed to buy his bride’s family gift as a sort of bride price, a sort of toll he needed to pay before marrying her. The tradition comes from my Cameroonian culture. I remember the room filling with laughter, negotiations, and happiness, which marked the beginning of a lifelong connection.”

CONTEXT: This ritual was shared by the informant, F, during a conversation about wedding customs in different cultures. F talked about a marriage tradition from his Cameroonian background, where the groom must give gifts to the bride’s family before the wedding. He described attending his cousin’s bride price ceremony, where everyone laughed, talked, and celebrated together. F emphasized how important this step was in connecting the two families and honoring long-standing customs.

ANALYSIS: This is a good example of a cultural tradition that happens during big life events like marriage. In Cameroonian culture, the groom gives gifts to the bride’s family, which shows respect and seriousness about the marriage. It’s not just about the couple but about bringing two families together. Even though times have changed, people like F’s cousin still follow this tradition, which helps keep their culture alive. For F, it was more than just a party—it was a special moment that showed how important family and tradition are.