Author Archives: Kian Mirnezam

The Stripes of a Tiger

Nationality: Brazilian
Age: 19
Occupation: Student
Residence: Los Angeles
Performance Date: April 21, 2017
Primary Language: English
Language: Portuguese

Once upon a time, there was a tiger who had a farm. The farm was overgrown with underbrush and the tiger sought a worker to clear the ground for him to plant.

The tiger called all the animals together and said to them when they had assembled, “I need a good workman at once to clear my farm of the underbrush. To the one who will do this work I offer an ox in payment.”

The monkey was the first one to step forward and offer himself up for the position. The tiger tried him for a little while but he was not a good workman at all. He did not work steadily enough to accomplish anything. The tiger fired him very soon and he did not pay him.

Then the tiger hired the goat to do the work. The goat worked faithfully but he did not have the brains to work well. He would clear a little of the farm in one place and then he would go away and work on another part of it. The tiger discharged him very soon without paying him.

Next the tiger tried the armadillo. The armadillo was very strong and he did the work well. The trouble with him was that he had a HUGE appetite. There were a great many ants at the farm and the armadillo could never pass one up without stopping to eat it. It was lunch time all day long with him. The tiger discharged him and sent him away without paying him anything.

Finally, the rabbit applied for the position. The tiger laughed at him and said, “Why, little one, you are too small to do the work. The monkey, the goat, and the armadillo have all failed to give satisfaction. Of course a little beast like you will fail too.”

However, the rabbit worked well, and soon he had cleared a large portion of the ground. The next day he worked just as well. The tiger found himself lucky to hire the rabbit.

After the tiger had gone away the rabbit said to the tiger’s son, “The ox which your father is going to give me is has a white spot on his left ear and another on his right side, right?”

“Oh no,” replied the tiger’s son. “He is red all over with just a tiny white spot on his right ear.”

The rabbit worked for a while longer and then he said, “The ox which your father is going to give me is kept by the river, isn’t he?”

“Yes,” replied the tiger’s son.

The rabbit had made a plan to go and get the ox without waiting to finish his work. Just as he started off he saw the tiger returning. The tiger noticed that the rabbit had not worked so well when he was away. After that he stayed and watched the rabbit until the whole farm was cleared. Then the tiger gave the rabbit the ox as he had promised.

“You must kill the ox,” he said to the rabbit, “in a place where there are neither flies nor mosquitoes.”

The rabbit went away with the ox. After he had gone for some distance he thought he would kill him. He heard a chicken, however, crowing in the distance and he knew that there must be a farm yard near. There would be flies of course. He went on farther and again he thought that he would kill the ox.s. Since the rabbit thought there would be mosquitoes there he decided not to kill the ox. He went on and on and finally he came to a high place where there was a strong breeze blowing. “There are no mosquitoes here,” he said to himself. “The place is so far removed from any habitation that there are no flies, either.” He decided to kill the ox.

Just as he was ready to eat the ox, along came the tiger. “Rabbit, you have been such a good friend of mine,” said the tiger, “and now I am so very, very hungry that all my ribs show, as you yourself can see. Will you not be a good kind rabbit and give me a piece of your ox?”

The rabbit gave the tiger a piece of the ox. The tiger devoured, leaned back and said, “Is that all you are going to give me to eat?”

The rabbit did not dare refuse to give him any more of the ox. The tiger ate and ate and ate until he had devoured that entire ox. The rabbit had been able to get only a tiny morsel of it. He was very, very angry at the tiger.

One day not long after the rabbit went to a place not far from the tiger’s house and began cutting down pieces of wood. The tiger soon came along and asked him what he was doing.

“I’m getting ready to build a stockade around myself,” replied the rabbit. “Haven’t you heard the orders?” The tiger said that he hadn’t heard any orders.

“That is very strange,” said the rabbit. “The order has gone forth that every beast shall fortify himself by building a stockade around himself. All the beasts are doing it.”

The tiger got alarmed. “Oh dear! What shall I do,” he cried. “I don’t know how to build a stockade. I never could do it in the world. Good rabbit! Kind rabbit! You are such, a very good friend of mine. Couldn’t you, as a great favor, because of our long friendship, build a stockade about me before you build one around yourself?”

The rabbit replied that he could not think of risking his own life by building the tiger’s fortifications first. Finally, however, he consented to do it.

The rabbit cut down great quantities of long sharp sticks. He set them firmly in the ground about the tiger. He fastened others securely over the top until the tiger was completely shut in by strong bars. Then he went away and left the tiger.

The tiger waited and waited for something to happen to show him the need of the fortifications. Nothing at all happened.

He got very hungry and thirsty. After a while the monkey passed that way.

The tiger called out, “Monkey, has the danger passed?”

The monkey did not know what danger the tiger meant, but he replied, “Yes.”

Then the tiger said, “Monkey, will you not please be so kind as to help me out of my stockade?”

“Let the one who got you in there help you out,” replied the monkey and he went on his way.

Along came the goat and the tiger called out, “Goat, has the danger passed?”

The goat did not know anything about any danger, but he replied, “Yes.”

Then the tiger said, “Kind goat, please be so kind as to help me out of my stockade.”

“Let the one who got you in there help you out,” replied the goat as he went on his way.

Along came the armadillo and the tiger called out, “O, armadillo, has the danger passed?”

The armadillo had not heard of any danger, but he replied that it had passed.

Then the tiger said, “Kind armadillo, you have always been such a good friend and neighbor. Please help me now to get out of my stockade.”

“Let the one who got you in there help you out,” replied the armadillo as he went on his way.

The tiger jumped and jumped with all his force at the top of the stockade, but he could not break through. He jumped and jumped with all his might at the front side of the stockade, but he could not break through. He thought that never in the world would he be able to break out. He rested for a little while and as he rested he thought. He thought how bright the sun was shining outside. He thought what good hunting there was in the jungle. He thought how cool the water was at the spring. Once more he jumped and jumped with all his might at the back side of the stockade. At last he broke through. He did not get through, however, without getting bad cuts on both his sides from the sharp edges of the staves. Until this day the tiger has stripes on both his sides. This a little fun folk tone analyzing how the Brazilian mythos sees the world of animals coming together biogenetically into what it actually is.

 

The Rabbit of the Valley

Nationality: Iranian
Age: 53
Occupation: Chief Financial Officer
Residence: San Diego
Performance Date: April 13, 2017
Primary Language: English
Language: Farsi

Once in a  beautiful valley, a river ran, watering all of the  trees and other plants. Many animals made this valley their home — rabbits, birds, squirrels,  and deer. They all lived happily in the valley, because there were no predators like wolves or lions in sight.

But one day, a wolf climbed down the mountains and entered the valley. Before long, all the animals were being eaten one by one by this vicious wolf, leaving all the animals were worried that next, it would be their turn.

In their worry, the animals turned to the old, wise owl, and tried to find a way to get rid of the wolf. The owl said that the wolf was so fast, vicious and powerful that no one could possibly defeat him and the solution was to find a way to coexist with him instead. The animals protested; saying  that they shouldn’t have to  live in constant fear of being eaten, and so they hatched a desperate plan: it was agreed everyday, one of the animals would be selected by the others, who would go to the wolf and be eaten one by one in a chain-like process. That way, the rest of the animals would rest peacefully, knowing that the wolf had eaten that day and would not be chasing them and be prepared and willing when their time had come.

And the wolf, who was tired of chasing the animals agreed to this plan without hesitation, knowing that it would just mean an easier opportunity for him to obtain food.

On the first morning of this process, all the animals decided that the rabbit (who was the smallest and weakest resident of the valley), was to be fed to the wolf.

The rabbit was scared and  tried to run away, only to realize that he had nowhere to go. He then considered fighting the wolf, but soon realized that the wolf was way more powerful than him.  So he sadly walked over to the wolf’s lair, and once there, cried out “Oh wolf! Oh wolf! Come out of your lair, for I am to be your supper today.”

The wolf immediately came out of its lair, and sniffed the rabbit hungrily. “Why, what a delicious little dinner you will make!” said the wolf, “I can’t believe my luck in finding this valley where the animals sacrifice themselves to me so willingly!”

“It is true, I was brought here by my own four little feet,” the rabbit said, “for I know that I cannot escape my fate, and such a mighty wolf as you, even though you’re not the scariest or most powerful wolf in the valley.”

At this, the vain wolf was shocked. “What do you mean, I’m not the scariest or most powerful wolf in this valley? I am the only wolf here, and there are no other wolves in this valley!” cried the wolf, indignantly.

“Oh, you don’t know about the other wolf,” said the rabbit. “You should go ahead and eat me now, for even if I escape your clutches, no animal could ever hope to escape the other, scarier and more powerful, wolf.” The rabbit then tried to climb into the wolf’s mouth.

The wolf shook him out of his mouth and said, “Take me to this other wolf, and I will spare you for today, my delicious little rabbit. Show me where this other wolf who thinks he’s better than me lives.”

The rabbit sighed and said “Follow me then.”

“We shall see who is bigger and stronger. Lead on!” said the wolf

So the wolf followed the rabbit as they walked three miles, until they reached an old abandoned well.

“There,” pointed the rabbit, “There is the lair of the other wolf, who is stronger and meaner than you. All you have to do is look down into the well, and I am sure you will see him in there!”

At this, the wolf jumped up onto the well wall, and peered down into the darkness.

“I don’t see anything, it is too dark!” said the wolf.

So the wolf bent over, and stuck his head into the well. After a few moments, when his eyes had a chance to adjust to the darkness, the wolf saw his own reflection in the water at the bottom of the well, as if it was another wolf looking back at him.

The rabbit, who had witnessed the wolf arguing with himself in the well, told the wolf, “I don’t think he’s coming out here. Naturally, the bigger and scarier wolf will have to chase after the smaller, less-scary one.”

The wolf ,without hesitation, jumped into the well, chasing after his own reflection in the water. But since the wolf did not know how to swim, he never came out of the old well, and the valley was rid of the evil wolf — thanks to, out of everyone, a small, weak rabbit.

 

The Mouse and Lion

Nationality: Iranian
Age: 53
Occupation: Chief Financial Officer
Residence: San Diego
Performance Date: April 13, 2017
Primary Language: English
Language: Farsi

One day a mouse walking across his path in the forest when a massive beast of a lion lunged after him and grabbed him by the paw. The mouse began to squeal as the lion roared in delight, ready to devour his prey.

“Stop! If you do not eat me, one day I will return the favor!” said the mouse.

“How can such a little mouse ever do me any favors?” said the lion.

“Sometimes the littlest ones have the biggest spirit” replied the mouse. And while the lion was skeptical, he decided to give the mouse the benefit of the doubt and let him go free.

The next day, a legion of hunters attacked the lion and tied up before leaving to get the necessary tools to skin him.

While they were gone, the mouse returned and using his teeth, cut open the rope to free the lion, who gleaming with joy looked at the mouse and asked “How does a little mouse have such a big heart?”

Essentially this tale is about being kind to one another and how that goes a long way of paying it forward in the long run.

 

The Homeless Wanderer

Nationality: Iranian
Age: 53
Occupation: Chief Financial Officer
Residence: San Diego
Performance Date: April 13, 2017
Primary Language: English
Language: Farsi

Once, there was a wandering homeless man who was starving and stranded in the desert. As he was walking along an old desert path in search of something to eat, he found an empty sack of fruit. The homeless man picked up the sack and swung it over his shoulder and began to pray “Thank God for giving a starving man an empty sack of fruit”. After that, he continued to walk and across on old hunting bow with a brokens string. He picked up the bow and put it in his sack, and prayed “Thank God for giving a starving man a hunting bow with a broken string.”

The homeless man walked some more, and he saw an old tree that was dead had no fruit. He broke a few branches off of the old tree and put them in his sack, and prayed “Thank God for leading a starving man to a dead fruit tree,” and then he continued upon his path

After walking some more, he found an old cooking pot and picked it up off the ground, blew the dust off of it and put it in his sack too. As usual, he prayed “Thank god for giving a starving man an old pot full of dust”.

As he continued walking, he found an old fishing hook but no fishing pole. He picked up the fishing hook, put it in his sack and prayed “Thank God for giving a starving man a fishing hook with no fishing pole.”

Finally, after days of walking, his path ended in at a river. The old homeless fellows fell to his knees at the river bank and prayed loudly, “Thank God for leading a starving man to a river so great that he cannot hope to cross it.”

Then, the homeless man realized his purpose and tied the fishing hook to the broken string on the hunting bow, and using it as a fishing pole, caught himself a fish that he cooked in the old pot over a fire he had made from the dried tree branches. The moral of this story: don’t take anything for granted and gratefully use anything you have to the best of your advantage.

 

The Wolf and the Fortune Teller

Nationality: Iranian
Age: 53
Occupation: Chief Financial Officer
Residence: San Diego
Performance Date: April 13, 2017
Primary Language: English
Language: Farsi

Late one night, an old fortuneteller was returning home from the local market place. Since it was getting dark rather quickly, the fortuneteller wanted to get home quicker and took a shortcut through the woods, where she ran into a rather hungry wolf. As the wolf prepared to devour her, she cried out, “Oh wolf! Spare me and I will tell you your future!”

And so, the wolf agreed, and the fortuneteller held the wolf’s ear and told the wolf, “You will become a shepard.” The wolf  sat down and started crying, much to the surprise of the fortuneteller.

“Why are you crying,” asked the fortuneteller.

“I’m afraid you might be lying,” said the wolf. Essentially, this little folktale is a small little anecdote about the dangers of being dishonest while also playing upon dramatic irony in the situation by having the wolf (the supposed antagonist of the piece) appear to be distraught when he believes that the fortune teller is lying to him and it is all a sham. In many ways, this can be seen as a Middle Eastern alternative spin on the classic western folk tale of the Boy Who Cried Wolf.