Main Text:

“Socks and sandals. Those really are the two genders.” Variation for follow up: “Damn call me non-binary then”

Context:

Two related things are brought up and presented as being “the two genders”. First saw this as a tumblr meme – cannot remember the original. Originally the “two genders” notion was from some right-wing conservative person trying to invalidate queer people, but the argument has been reappropriated to be humorous.

Thought:

This joke is usually told within queer circles where the notion that there are only two genders is already funny. Usually the two things being distinguished are part of a similar subculture or part of adjacent subcultures. Alternatively, the two genders are almost identical things which can start some heated arguments or spiral the conversation into unexpected directions. The current [2022] college generation age, within a liberal arts setting, also uses the word “vibe” quite a bit, and the two genders joke is often used in conjunction with establishing and identifying vibes. When this joke lands in a crowd, it is quickly designated as a safer space for anyone queer, which more often than not brings about good vibes (safe vibes are good vibes). It’s also a way to tell if you need to leave the room because the people in it might be intolerant to the point where you [a queer individual] might prefer to be elsewhere.

Main Text:

“Ice out” when the ice thaws out far enough to jump into a lake – you jump into the lake.

Context:

Family/New England tradition. Within family – a nude tradition. Repeated every year. Was on some level a “Oh haha look the cold doesn’t bother me thing”.

Thought:

Some nude-related family traditions are usually remembered as bonding moments as this in hindsight is usually quite a vulnerable memory. Informant noted that this has been a thing for as long as they can remember. There’s also the pressure that comes, especially as a child, to prove to your parents that you can handle yourself. In the case, cold is the thing to be handled, and the child can reasonably establish that they are willing to deal with some physical discomfort for the sake of social bonding – not that it is necessarily such an explicit thought process.

Main Text:

Whenever you eat rice, don’t leave rice in the bowl; otherwise, every single rice from your bowl will be a zit on your face. 

Context:

Informant’s mom “made stuff up” so that she would finish rice. The informant also noted that she thinks that leaving rice in the bowl is bad overall (in China). In Japan rice is also sacred, so it’s bad to leave anything behind. Usually only said at home or around family. Half the bowl is fine because she’s not hungry, but if it’s not cleaned up after a meal this will be said

Thought: 

When asked about where this comes from the informant noted that she thinks that’s t’s fairly regular thing in Asian household to make up things to get children to clean their plates. She also noted that it is something she has seen with variations in media. The superficial value of this is to not waste food and to be economic with resources; however, the informant seemed aware of some deeper meaning or superstition that simply hasn’t been disclosed to her. There is likely some important commentary to be made on beauty standards, as this is the threat that was brought up (zits being seen as not beautiful), but the informant said that this was probably not an intentional thing, despite it bearing relevance on how she has interacted with the main text.

Main Text: 

“Don’t stick your chopsticks upright in your bowl – it’s for the dead”

Context:

Informant talked about how this is a bad omen Asian culture. Now however it’s just considered rude to do – without the superstition and is just generally rude socially.

Thoughts:

The informant seemed slightly disinterested in the superstition she talked about, as she does not believe in the superstition; however, she did stress the social connotation and that she still observes this practice and even becomes uncomfortable when other people don’t. It is interesting that this tradition is being maintained without any of the extended beliefs attached and has turned into etiquette outside of spiritual observation.

Main Text:

“Don’t pass food directly between chopsticks.”

Context:

“This action is reserved for handling bones after cremation. The family passes the bones of the person between each other to the container that holds it. Some see it as a bad omen to pass things between chopsticks otherwise – Chinese and Japanese usually. It is just generally rude in any setting unless designated otherwise to be rude.”

Thoughts:

While there a sanitary byproduct to this tradition (no saliva exchange as etiquette demands that when picking up food from the center of the table, the person picking it up should use the backside of the chopsticks – this is true for also then serving that food to other people at the table), this action is primarily something set aside for interacting with the dead. As with the etiquette to not stick chopsticks upright into anything – particular rice – food and food related tools have specific designations when interacting with the dead vs the living.