Text: My father, JW, was told by his parents in Ohio in the 1970s, whenever he refused to finish his dinner: “Finish your food, there are children starving in China.”

My mother, IW, who grew up in suburb of Beijing in the same decade, was told something similar: “把饭吃完，美国还有小孩没饭吃” (bǎ fàn chī wán, Měiguó hái yǒu xiǎohái méi fàn chī), literally: “finish your food, in America there are still children with no food to eat.”

Both invocations were performed at the dinner table. Both intended to produce guilt in a child sufficient to clear the plate. 

Context: In Ohio, JW’s parents and grandparents drew on a long American tradition of using China as the reference point for starving children. In Beijing, IW’s parents drew on Cultural Revolution rhetoric, in which capitalist America was officially characterized as a place of mass inequality and hunger. My parents realized this surprising symmetry in their respective childhoods after they had married. 

Analysis: The mealtime “starving children” phrase is a textbook example of folk speech functioning as parental disciplinary technique. What is notable here is the mirror: in the same decade, parents in Ohio and parents in a Beijing suburb were deploying the identical rhetorical structure with the other country supplying the sympathetic reference point. In the United States, China is the pitiable other nation filled with hungry children, in China, it’s America. The form is highly stable across speakers, the only thing that varies is which country gets named, which is itself dictated by where you are sitting at dinner. It’s very interesting to me this convergent evolution from two sides of the world of deploying guilt and sympathy against stubborn children.