Category Archives: Folk Beliefs

A Very Indian Joke

Nationality: Indian
Age: 82
Occupation: Philosopher, Writer
Residence: Hyderabad, AP, India
Performance Date: 3/17/2014
Primary Language: English
Language: Telugu, Hindi, Tamil, Kannada, Sanskrit

Item:

“In India, it is not uncommon – actually, scratch that, it is incredibly common to make tongue-in-cheek jokes against members of other cultures. They are not meant to be offended, because everyone makes such jokes against others. This is one of them. Pay close attention: Three men – a Hindu, a Christian, and a Muslim – are in a boat, and it is starting to sink because the boat is too heavy to stay afloat. In order to keep the boat from sinking, the three men all decide to make compromises and throw something overboard to lighten the load. The Hindu says, ‘I’m going to throw my Rolex overboard. I’ve got two or three more watches like this at home.’ And so he does. The Christian takes off his impressive top-hat and antique walking cane and promptly throws them over, saying, ‘I’ve got several more of these at home as well.’ The Muslim, to the shock of the other two men, picks up his wife and deposits her unceremoniously into the ocean, proclaiming, ‘I’m throwing my wife overboard. I’ve got several more wives like this at home!'”

Context:

The informant related his experience with this joke: “It was actually my brother-in-law who had come up with this joke after he’d had a little too much to…well, you know. He told me the joke at a party some sixty years ago, but I didn’t find it as funny as he did, perhaps because I was slightly more sober than he was. But only slightly. However, I must confess that did steal the joke from him, obviously because I’m the better joke-teller. Don’t look at me like that, I’m not making it up! I actually modified it a little and then told it at a dinner. It got many more laughs than when he told it. See?”

Analysis:

As the informant said, in India, it is very common to make jokes about other cultures, religions, and ethnic subgroups, poking fun at things that are stereotypical to their particular community. In this particular blason populaire, there are stereotypes of more than one group. In India, there are three distinct images – the Hindu man dressed in a very Spartan manner, with cotton everything except for his expensive gold watch; the Christian man with his tailored suit, felt top-hat, and wooden walking cane; and the Muslim man with his train of wives. Out of all of the three stereotypes, this joke exploits, in particular, the image of the polygamous Muslim, a depiction that has particular popularity among the socially and sexually conservative Hindu community. These two communities have been at odds with each other since the Partition in 1947, and therefore, many ethnic jokes have sprung up from this division in both communities, exploiting stereotypes on either side of the great divide.

Donuts, Donuts, Donuts!

Nationality: Indian
Age: 20
Occupation: Student
Residence: Claremont, California
Performance Date: 3/22/2014
Primary Language: English
Language: Hindi, German

Item:

“You know this is my favorite joke ever. Because it’s hilarious. And also because I’ve probably told it to you a million times. So this young guy, who comes from a minority population and speaks pretty limited English, starts working at a donut joint. At this point, he’s told to say ‘Donuts, donuts, donuts!’ to customers with questions. So the first day of work, this customer comes in and asks ‘what do you sell here?’ The guy who works there does as he’s told and says, ‘Donuts, donuts, donuts!’ But he says that to every other question he’s asked, which are ‘How much to they cost?’, ‘Are they fresh?’, and ‘Should I buy them?’. Supremely confused, the customer leaves. So the manager tells the kid to say ‘Twenty five cents’ when asked how much they cost. Then another customer comes in with the same questions – ‘What do you sell here?’, ‘Donuts, donuts, donuts!’, ‘How much do they cost?’ ‘Twenty five cents.’, ‘Are they fresh?’, ‘Twenty five cents.’, ‘Should I buy them?’ ‘Twenty five cents.’ The manager, an understanding guy, tells the kid to say ‘Very, very fresh’ when he’s asked if the donuts are fresh. And so, naturally, in walks a third customer. The same suite of questions is asked, and instead of answering ‘Yes!’ to ‘Should I buy them?’, the poor kid answers, ‘Very, very fresh!’. Obviously because he doesn’t know any better. Now starting to get fed up, the manager tells him to respond, ‘Do it before somebody else does!’ to the question ‘Should I buy them?’.

And so, now that the kid’s finally got everything down, guess who comes in next? A guy dressed in black who’s obviously robbing the joint. The exchange goes like this:

Burglar – Whaddaya sell here?!

Kid – Donuts, donuts, donuts!

Burglar – How much you got in the register?

Kid – Twenty five cents.

Burglar – Are you acting fresh with me?!?!

Kid – Very, very fresh.

Burglar – That’s it! I’m gonna shoot you!

Kid – Do it before somebody else does!

And so, you can probably guess how the story ends.”

Context:

I was reminded that I already knew the context of this story, but I asked the informant to relate it anyway. “This is our family’s favorite joke. Ever,” he said. “You know because I’ve been telling it since we were kids. It shows you how a nice guy with a limitation in his knowledge of the English language, of which he is benignly unaware, gets in trouble because of his blissful ignorance.”

Analysis:

This joke takes on more than one form. It can be seen as a blason populaire against non English-speaking minorities, a darkly comedic cautionary tale against the disadvantages of not knowing the English language, and gallows humor. It is made apparent at the very beginning by the performer that the kid in the story is unfamiliar with English, and this is what ultimately ends up getting him shot by a burglar. In a rapidly globalizing society, the importance of the lingua franca is highlighted at the end of the sordidly humorous tale. Confused and dissatisfied customers might not be that big of a deal, but angry, armed pastry bandits? Nuh-uh.

A Big White Van

Nationality: American (of Indian heritage)
Age: 12 (parent consent given)
Occupation: Student
Residence: Cupertino, California
Performance Date: 3/20/214
Primary Language: English
Language: Hindi, Kannada, Tamil, Spanish, Polish

Item and Context:

“My seniors in school – the eighth graders – would always tell us to ‘Never trust a man in a big white van!’ We were all really interested in why, especially because my friend Evan thought that white vans were pretty cool. Haha, no… So he, bold as he is, went up to one of the many eighth graders repeating this warning and asked them what the story was. When he returned, he informed me that it was because this one kid from our middle school had been kidnapped by a man in a big white van and held for ransom! So when a friend of mine asked me about it, I repeated to him exactly what Evan had told me. After a few days, there was a rumor spreading around the school that the man in a big white van had taken away one of the students many years ago, and that student had been held for ransom, and when the parents failed to come up with the cash, the kid was murdered and his spirit was the one telling the eighth graders to ‘Never trust a man in a big white van!’! I did not understand how this happened. I assume that it traveled from Evan to me to A to B to C and so on, finally resulting in this wild exaggeration. How strange, no?”

Analysis:

The proverb/superstition that this story is based on is an example of children’s lore. However, what is most interesting is that while it is an example of a type of folklore, the story the informant provided is also a perfect depiction of exactly how folklore happens. I doubt that his friend was even told about a “ransom”, and instead added that detail just to spice up the story. As the story went around the middle school, everyone freely added their own details to it, resulting in something starkly different than what these eighth graders were probably talking about, much like the game ‘Telephone’, which is also an excellent example of the process of folklore creation. The belief that the warning is based on is that large, white, unmarked vans are usually driven by creepy pedophiles who offer little girls candy and then whisk them away. Hence, according to the informant and his seniors at school – ‘Never trust a man in a big white van!’

 

Jinxed Travel

Nationality: Indian
Age: 20
Occupation: Student
Residence: Claremont, California
Performance Date: 3/19/2014
Primary Language: English
Language: Hindi, German

Item:

“Never ask someone where they’re going before they’re about to leave.”

Context:

My informant reminded me of his relationship to the superstition: “I’m sure you remember this one better than I do, since you’re the one who always asks the question before Mummy and Dad go anywhere. But anyway, I’m not sure if it’s just a family thing or if other people do it too, but every time Mummy and Dad are about to leave somewhere and one of us kids has the stupid idea to ask them where they’re going, we get a shouting. Why? Because you’re not supposed to ask someone where they’re going before they get there, even if it’s like just to the grocery store or something. Why? I’m not sure. Maybe it’s some kind of weird jinx or something. They never tell us why.”

Analysis:

As the informant rightly suggested, this superstition must be some form of a jinx on the journey that is about to begin, however long or short it may be. It’s similar to when someone is about to try something new, for example enter a competition or begin a new relationship, and someone close to them says something good about the upcoming project/endeavor, and is told promptly not to “jinx it” and to shut up. Strangely though, this jinx does not extend past travel in the family. It is only when the parents are asked where they’re headed that they are supposedly jinxed – not when something bigger or more important is about to happen.

Writing In Water

Nationality: American (of Indian heritage)
Age: 12 (parent consent given)
Occupation: Student
Residence: Cupertino, California
Performance Date: 3/19/2014
Primary Language: English
Language: Hindi, Kannada, Tamil, Spanish, Polish

Item and Context:

“Kadhan Aardh! (You will have bad luck!) I remember hearing this every time I tried to write something in water on the windows of our car. It was so unfair. Every other kid gets to write in their car window water without being cursed by their mother. Geez. I mean, I got so fed up that I just went and asked Mummy what was so bad about drawing a smiley face in fogged up windows. She told me it was something about water taking away your wishes because it’s so volatile and temporary or something like that. So yeah, don’t write anything in water…in front of your Indian mother.”

Analysis:

As the informant mentioned, water is a very ‘volatile and temporary’ substance, always changing form, flowing, and vanishing from sight. In Hindu tradition, water is considered a soul-cleansing substance. It takes away everything with it. In the case of the informant, he just drew a smiley face in the foggy window of his family’s car, but his mother’s superstitious concerns would be understandable if he had been writing some life’s goal or deep, dark wish in the droplets of water, and it trickled away, or evaporated, causing any hope of the wish coming true to dissipate into the air or percolate into the ground, far away from reach, with it.