Category Archives: Customs

Customs, conventions, and traditions of a group

Eye Contact

Nationality: American
Age: 21
Occupation: Student (Nursing)
Residence: Boston, Massachusetts USA
Performance Date: 2/12/17
Primary Language: English
Language: French

Background:

My informant is a twenty-one-year-old college student in Boston, Massachusetts. She is studying to be a nurse and has worked in the emergency room at both Massachusetts General Hospital and Brigham and Women’s Hospital.

Performance:

“I heard this when I was in Australia for the summer. It was just before junior year, I think…yeah, that sounds right, but anyway I was at a party kind of near Melbourne and these guys were pouring shots. So I took one and was about to take it and this one guy like grabbed my wrist and was like ‘Wait! Stop! We all need to make eye contact otherwise we’ll all have bad sex for seven years!’ Like that thing with breaking the mirror or something, you know? So we all made eye contact and took the shots and that was that. Weirdly I heard that a ton in Australia, like in Sydney and Cairns and all over. Not just from guys either, like from girls I made friends with and everything. It wasn’t just some gross dude…like, being gross, or whatever (laughter)  I’ve done it ever since. I mean, obviously it’s probably not a real thing, but like, why risk it? (laughter).”

Thoughts:

It seems appropriate that this superstition is prominent amongst young people, a demographic which in all likelihood sees a close connection between sex and alcohol. The ritual itself invokes a certain intimacy; one must look into their companion’s eyes, “the gateway to the soul” before consuming alcohol with them. Since the superstition is present amongst both groups of single-sex, heterosexual friends and mixed-gender social groups, it may not necessarily have much to do with sexual intercourse; the eye contact and intimacy may speak more to the idea that drinking is a social activity and means through which people can develop new relationships.

El Salvadorean Proverb

Nationality: Hispanic
Age: 48
Occupation: Payroll Administrator
Residence: Los Angeles
Performance Date: March 26, 2017
Primary Language: Spanish
Language: English

I went home for dinner. During a conversation with my mom, she mentioned the following:

Proverb

“Ponte Las Pilas.” translated to “Put You Batteries [On].”

I then asked my mom what that meant, she responded:

“Ponte las pilas means ponte las pilas. It means to put on your batteries but I always say it to remind you guys to work hard, be alert, and be attentive. The whole statement is used as a quick pick me up, or like a mini motivational speech. Ponte las pilas is a way for me to remind you and your sister to be more responsible, to get up, and to go get what you want. That’s how I use it. Some people use it differently. I’ve heard it been used like lets say you have a couple and the boyfriend isn’t giving the girlfriend enough attention then you’d say ‘Ponte las pilas’ like ‘Hey, be more attentive or someone may steal her’.”

Collector Analysis:

At this point, this proverb is ingrained into my mom’s brain. She was raised listening to this proverb. I have heard my grandma say it in the past, and my grandma has definitely said the proverb to me as well. This proverb is very generational, as my grandma told my mom and now, my mom has told my sister and I. To my mom, this proverb is obviously a way of telling my sister and I to work harder. She believes that just saying “work harder” is too blunt and that no one would listen. ‘Ponte las pilas’ is a more generous way of saying “get it together”.

Just like my mom, I have been hearing this proverb my entire life. I have heard it for a wide array of reasons. Normally, if I am complaining to my mom about how much school work I have she’ll merely respond, “ponte las pilas”. Another circumstance is if I’ve been in bed all day, my mom might come into the room and say the proverb. This proverb is the type of statement I’ll probably hear or say for the rest of my life.

Japanese Monkey Proverb

Nationality: Chinese, Japanese
Age: 18
Occupation: Student
Residence: Los Angeles
Performance Date: April 2, 2017
Primary Language: Japanese
Language: English

My friend and I got to one of our classes early. While we waited I asked her if she knew any folklore. She happily gave me a legend about the Mid-Autumn Festival. She also gave me two proverbs. Here is the first:

“さるも き から おちる (saru mo ki kara ochiru).” translates to “Even monkeys fall from trees.”

I asked her what the proverb meant, here is what she said:

“Well, ‘Even monkeys fall from trees’ is a really famous Japanese proverb. I’ve heard it from pretty much every person of my dad’s side of the family… its like basically saying even the best will fail. So like during my family game nights, my mom usually dominates trivia but sometimes if my dad wins, which rarely happens, he’ll say the proverb to my mom just as a reminder that she’s still better than him at trivia, it was probably just an off day. So, yeah… its kind of similar to ‘everyone makes mistakes’ but not quite. I think this proverb is more specific because its like no matter how good you are at something, you can slip, and that’s okay.”

Collector Analysis:

I thought this was a very beautiful proverb. The message of accepting failure is so important and I think it is a beneficial proverb to grow up hearing because it teaches not to fear failure because it is only natural. So many people think that to be successful means to never fail, but success is measured in the amount of times someone failed and got right back up to try again. This proverb really gets the point across about how natural failing is. I really wish I had grown up hearing this proverb because coming from a family member this proverb is endearing and uplifting. I wonder if other cultures have a similar proverb.

Japanese Frog Proverb

Nationality: Chinese, Japanese
Age: 18
Occupation: Student
Residence: Los Angeles
Performance Date: April 2, 2017
Primary Language: Japanese
Language: English

My friend and I got to one of our classes early. While we waited I asked her if she knew any folklore. She happily gave me a legend about the Mid-Autumn Festival. She also gave me two proverbs. Here is the second:

“井の中の蛙大海を知らず (I no naka no kawazu taikai wo shirazu)  translates to “A frog in the well doesn’t know the great sea.”

I asked her what the proverb meant, here is what she said:

“I don’t like this one as much as the monkey proverb. I’ve also heard this one less from my dad because I feel like this is a more specific proverb. Like it can only be used in so many different ways. My dad can literally work the Moneky proverb into basically anything. But this proverb is a little harder. I call this one the Frog Proverb, for obvious reasons. Basically, it means you shouldn’t judge because we each have our own narrow experience of the world. The well is the way we see and perceive the world. As much as we like to think we know the great sea because all of our experiences are limited we can’t ever fully perceive and understand the world like others do. Like I said, I’ve only heard it a few times though.”

Collector Analysis:

Firstly, I found it funny that both the proverbs my friend provided for me had to deal with animals. I’m sure Japanese culture is flooded with proverbs, but I find it beyond coincidental that the two Japanese proverbs I collected were animal based. This probably speaks to the emphasis traditional Japanese culture places on nature. Secondly, this proverb has a completely different feel from the monkey proverb. I feel like the monkey proverb is playful, but this proverb sounds more along the lines of sacred knowledge. To me, the frog proverb is depressing. I interpret the frog proverb in the sense that the frog believes he is in the great sea as he only knows the well. He knows no different and he doesn’t know that beyond the horizon lies a vast ocean. So I feel like the frog proverb basically points out everyone’s ignorance by telling us that our idea of the world isn’t close to the actual world at all.

Remedy for Indigestion

Nationality: Hispanic
Age: 52
Occupation: High School Principal
Residence: Los Angeles
Performance Date: April 9, 2017
Primary Language: English

My aunt was helping me learn to drive. During one of our lessons, I remembered what my grandma had done when my younger cousin got sick. I asked my aunt about the remedy and this is what she had to say:

“Do you mean ‘La sobada para el empacho’ (The Remedy for Indigestion)? Your grandma did that on all of us all the time while we were growing up. It really does work, just look at Alex (my younger cousin), he got better didn’t he? What you have to do is… let me think… your grandma will take castor oil and mix it with a spice called ‘brassica nigra’. She place it on a fire and let it sizzle for a while, then she’ll move it onto a pot and let it boil. Then, she’ll add water. Before it begins to boil, she removes the pot from the fire and begins to grind the mixture. She’ll place the pot  back on the fire until the mixture boils, and the water turns as black as coffee. After that’s happened, she’ll add milk to help it cool down. She begins by rubbing castor oil on the hands, elbows, knees, and feet on whoever she’s trying to cure. After she’ll take the mixture and feed the person a spoonful. The rest is used to massage the stomach and intestine area. You let the oils sink in and they should get better. I always did.”

Collector Analysis:

According to my aunt, this is a genuine remedy. She has personally experienced the healing qualities of this remedy. She says that the remedy is for indigestion but also food poisoning, as it helps children release everything they’ve recently eaten. Folk medicine is an interesting category because even modern medicine is based in folklore. I wonder what kind of characteristics the ingredients in this remedy have to offer, or why the remedy even works.  I, personally, have not experienced the remedy because my mother does not believe in it. However, I will say that my younger cousin did get better after my grandma had finished. Coincidence?