Tag Archives: Giving

Thanksgiving Tradition (the year I learned the true meaning of Thanksgiving)

Context:

My informant is my father who comes from a southern family, although he was born and raised in Los Angeles, California. I asked him for any holiday traditions he could think of aside from the ones that I am a part of and I thought of a story he told me about one of our family members a while back and thought it would be perfect. So here is what he said:

Text:

“At 16 years old, I didn’t fully understand the meaning of Thanksgiving. To me, it was just a day of eating lots of food with family and friends. But when I moved to Connecticut, my grandmother Ruby showed me the true meaning of the holiday. On Thanksgiving Day, Ruby spent a whole week preparing dinner and wrapping several plates of food in foil. I didn’t understand why she was doing this until she explained that we were going to give the food to people who were less fortunate than us. We drove to a city building where Ruby distributed the plates of food to people living on the streets. Seeing their gratitude and smiles made me realize that Thanksgiving was not just about feasting with family and friends, but also about giving back to the community. From then on, I made a commitment to give back every Thanksgiving, and the lesson my grandmother taught me stayed with me for life.”

Analysis:

From what I know about the origins of Thanksgiving, it started with the Pilgrims in the 1600s. During this time a harvest feast was shared between two groups of people to celebrate an expedition. I am not sure where the turkeys came into play, but that’s not the point of this story.

I too had the issue of not truly understanding the meaning Thanksgiving, but then my father told me this story and through movies and everything else its a time to show others you are grateful towards them and to openly express kindness to others. I enjoy this holiday for the food especially, so it is sad think about the people who do not get to enjoy it. Over the years, I feel Thanksgiving has strayed away from its roots a little bit, but I think the true meaning behind the holiday is to put aside differences for a day to celebrate being grateful and kind to each other.

Something that also comes to mind is the fact that this was my fathers grandmother who if I’m correct is from Texas. I say this because I think of the phrase “Southern Hospitality”. That and maybe things were different and there was more of a community dynamic, something more old school. People are still kind today, but I believe it is important to see more of that during Thanksgiving.

CHRISTMAS STOCKINGS

Nationality: Irish-American
Age: 54
Occupation: Environmental Government Employee
Residence: Boston, MA
Performance Date: 3/25/15
Primary Language: English

ABOUT THE INFORMANT:

My informant is a mother of three who lives just outside of Boston with her husband of over 30 years. She is originally from Cape Cod, the part of Massachusetts that is full of beaches and is a world known tourist destination. She is a lover of all thing water; she has worked extensively in water policy and water pollution as an environmentalist.

EXAMPLE:

Interviewee: My dad never did any Christmas shopping for anybody. He always left it all to Mom. As he got older, I guess he got much more free time. He would spend all year going to flea markets. Just searching for Christmas gifts. Sometimes something would catch his eye and he would not even know what it was. The year I ruptured my Achilles tendon playing tennis, I got Tennis For Dummies.

He would just give everyone a massive bag full of stuff. A bag for each person. All this cheap stuff he found at these yard sales and Salvation Armies; sometimes it was thoughtful, but most of it was crap.

It was the worst for the people dating into the family. When Lynn, my sister-in-law, first starting coming to the family Christmas, she got all these random things that no one knew anything about. Weird pieces of wood. A styrofoam ball. But she just took it and said thank you, trying to be polite, while he was just laughing because he knew that he gave crap. But then she surprised us all one year when she turned around and glued it together and created a figurine. Then she gave it to him.

We would come home with so much crap, we couldn’t keep it all, but I do have a farting Santa doll.

Interviewer: What about when he got sick?

Interviewee: When he passed away, we wanted to keep it alive. It was so much fun. We couldn’t all give everyone presents; that was just too much. But we all picked names and gave personalized stockings with funny and outrageous, sometimes nice, gifts to the person.

Interviewer: And you still do it?

Interviewee: Yeah, I mean, no one wanted to give it up. It is hard though. It is all tailored to them. There are no gift certificates. You have to really go out and think about them. It’s nice, even if it is crap. It’s crap tailored for them. Thoughtful crap.

ANALYSIS:

There is so much stress around Christmas. It clearly has become so overwhelmingly commercial and impersonal, that I feel like what her father was doing was almost the anti-version of that. Not to be a hipster or part of a counter culture or whatever, but because that’s what he wanted to do. He wanted to give hand picked crap. Just for the joke or shock. Because he was such a strong figure in this family and because he would not stop doing it, it became a tradition.

When he died, that is when it took on a whole new dimension. Not wanting to give him or it up they modified it, so that people kept getting these personalized stockings. Even though he was gone, the stockings and laughter did not have to go. That is most likely the sentimental aspect of it. On a practical level, it is a really good way to make sure that people get gifts for Christmas that feel as though they were personally chosen for them. An added benefit.