Category Archives: Customs

Customs, conventions, and traditions of a group

Death Ritual

Nationality: American
Age: 20
Occupation: Student
Residence: Aspen, CO
Performance Date: 4/6/18
Primary Language: English

Me: do you have a ritual you do when you lose someone close to you?:

“When I was seven years old during one summer my cousin who was three years older than me passed    away right around her birthday. She had a rare heart condition that no one really know about… I was with my younger cousin     who was visiting me when we both got the call and found out. Now whenever I       see a heart shaped rock I always pick it up for her.”

Me: When did you start doing that?:

“I started doing it right after it happened I think. When we went to her actual funeral we all put heart shaped rocks on her grave during her ceremony, and ever since then it’s been something I’ve always done.”

 

Background: Zoe is a twenty-year old girl from Aspen, Colorado and currently attending USC.

Context: Zoe told me this story at brunch discussing the pain of experiencing a family member who passes away.

Analysis: I was very touched by this story that she shared with me because losing someone important to you is a very intimate, difficult, and emotional thing to share. I have been fortunate enough to only have lost one person in my immediate family in the years I have been alive, so I could not fully understand what losing a close friend or cousin would feel like at such a young age. Everyone has a different understanding of what happens after death and what capacity we have to maintain in contact with the deceased when we are still living. I think collecting something beautiful that reminds you of a special person you lost is a really amazing way of remembering what they meant to you. Zoe has a physical manifestation of remembering her cousin, which I think is a really incredible away of believing that she is seeing a little piece of her cousin every time she comes across a heart-shaped rock in nature.

Flight Ritual/ Superstition

Nationality: American
Age: 20
Occupation: Student
Residence: Boston, MA
Performance Date: 4/9/18
Primary Language: English

In a conversation about upcoming travel plans, Lida brought up a ritual of her own:

“Before I get on a plane I touch the outside of the plane with a flat palm and if can, I touch the first window with a flat palm. I also walk on only with my right foot.”

 

I asked, when did you start doing that?

“I am really not sure when I started. I must have seen someone do it and then that was it. I did it every time and now I can’t fly unless I do it. I’m not sure if it’s a superstition but it’s kinda like a comfort thing. It’s a habit or like a routine that makes it seem like everything is gonna be like it always is when I’m flying.”

 

Background: Lida is a twenty-year old born and raised in Boston, MA and currently living in Los Angeles, CA attending USC as a sophomore. Her parents are divorced and she has two sisters.

Context: Lida brought up her ritual when we were talking about the upcoming trip she had the following weekend to fly home from school.

Analysis: This story totally resonated with me because I feel like I do many things that have become a “routine” simply for the sake of comfort and safety. I’ve always been an okay flyer, but my mom on the other hand, is a really nervous flyer. If I am on a plane with my mom she will always hold my hand for the entirety of the take-off and then again for the landing, but will be totally fine while we’re in the air. She has done this since I was a little girl, so now it has become instinct whenever I fly with her, and definitely a gesture of comfort. It is interesting to analyze how a gesture that will realistically not change any outcome of future events can create peace of mind and a calm disposition. I think the concept of folkloric “habits” in regard to beliefs or superstitions is an intriguing concept of study as they dramatically vary person to person and can be very uncommon or seem weird to others.

Reading of the Christmas Story

Nationality: Norwegian American
Age: 53
Occupation: Parent
Residence: Los Angeles, CA
Performance Date: 4/1/18
Primary Language: English

A father has implemented a tradition in his family that the eldest family member present reads the “Christmas Story” as recorded in the book of the Bible, Luke. This occurs before any Christmas presents are opened, he explains:

“I started this tradition as a way of reminding everyone what Christmas truly means without getting too wrapped up in the excitement of the holiday and the gift aspect. Christmas to me is a true celebration of life and having the oldest family member read the story is another way of celebrating life itself.

This version of the Christmas story text reads as follows (Luke Chapter 2: 1-21, NIV edition):

“In those days Caesar Augustus issued a decree that a census should be taken of the entire Roman world. And everyone went to their own town to register. So Joseph also went up from the town of Nazareth in Galilee to Judea, to Bethlehem the town of David, because he belonged to the house and line of David. He went there to register with Mary, who was pledged to be married to him and was expecting a child.

While they were there, the time came for the baby to be born, and she gave birth to her firstborn, a son. She wrapped him in cloths and placed him in a manger, because there was no guest room available for them.And there were shepherds living out in the fields nearby, keeping watch over their flocks at night. An angel of the Lord appeared to them, and the glory of the         Lord shone around them, and they were terrified. But the angel said to them,“Do not be afraid. I bring you good news that will cause great joy for all the people. Today in the town of David a Savior has been born to you; he is the Messiah, the Lord. This will be a sign to you: You will find a baby wrapped in cloths and lying in a manger.” Suddenly a great company of the heavenly host appeared with the angel, praising God and saying,

 “Glory to God in the highest heaven, and on earth peace to those on whom his favor rests.”

When the angels had left them and gone into heaven, the shepherds said to one another, “Let’s go to Bethlehem and see this thing that has happened, which the Lord has told us about.”So they hurried off and found Mary and Joseph, and the baby, who was lying in the manger. When they had seen him, they spread the word concerning what had been told them about this child, and all who heard it were amazed at what the shepherds said to them. But Mary treasured up all these things and pondered them in her heart. The shepherds returned, glorifying and praising God for all the things they had heard and seen, which were just as they had been told.On the eighth day, when it was time to circumcise the child, he was named Jesus, the name the angel had given him before he was conceived.”

 

 

Background:He is 53 years old and raised in Los Gatos, CA. He was raised in a Catholic home and began to strongly identify in the Christian faith after college and into his years as a father. He attended Santa Clara University in Silicon Valley.

Context:He shared this tradition with me at a dinner we had just the two of us. His mother had just passed away, and he was reflecting on his fondest memories of her.

Analysis: Family traditions, particularly those linked to particular holidays or particular people, is a really emotional form of folklore. There is something about a holiday ritual that evokes such a strong sense of family unity and solidarity that I think is very unique. In terms of the Christmas tradition explained above, the most captivating element is that the reading is done by the eldest family member every year. This is really emotional to think about, as the eldest family member could potentially change every year depending on family members who pass on. For the person who shared this story, his mom was the one reading the Christmas story for many years, until this Christmas, when the tradition had to be passed on to someone new. The tradition becomes heavy in this sense, but also a really beautiful way to continue someone’s legacy and memory within one family unit.

Family Meals Age Ritual

Nationality: American
Age: 23
Occupation: Real Estate
Residence: Brentwood, CA
Performance Date: 3/31/18
Primary Language: English

A conversation with a family friend is listed below:

Me: “My dad is going to say a short message tomorrow… he always does because we can never get everyone we want to to go to Easter service together.”

Response: “Yah I know I remember his thing from last year. I kinda like it though…haha..wouldn’t be the same without it. I was literally just telling someone about my holiday dinner family thing and that’s what it reminds me of.”

Me: “I have no idea what thing you’re talking about.”

Response: “Oh haha…I thought you heard me earlier. At holiday dinners my grandpa would always cut and carve the turkey, but when he no longer could because of being too old it’s a job for the next oldest son in his family. Think it’ll just keep going down the line of sons for every holiday.”

 

Background: He is 23 year old male raised in Simi Valley, CA and currently residing in Brentwood, CA as a post-graduate from USC.

Context: This conversation occurred while he was eating dinner at my house the night before Easter.

Analysis: This story was very interesting to me for multiple reasons. The first being that rituals stemming from family connections I think are a very telling way of learning more about a person you may already think you know well; this happened for me after engaging in the conversation above. Additionally, in this particular circumstance, their family ritual is completely male dominant. He didn’t mention anything that daughters do at their family gatherings, only males. I started to think about this concept in relation to my own family traditions, which I found very compelling to analyze. I think family rituals are extremely dynamic and engaging to explore.

Elf Magic Elves

Nationality: United States
Age: 20
Occupation: Student
Residence: Marietta, GA. Currently residing in Los Angeles, CA
Performance Date: 04/15/2018
Primary Language: English

Main Piece:

 

The following was recorded from the Participant. They are marked as AO. I am marked as DG.

 

 

AO: Oh, when I was in umm…fourth grade maybe third grade, um, there were these things called Elf Magic Elves and everyone had them. I don’t know where like it started out or, um, who had the first one but anyways by the time we were in like fifth grade, every single person had one… but the concept of these elves were that if you sprinkled, um, snowflakes on them then they like–and the snowflakes came with the elves, then they would, like, come to life and move around your house or like bake food or make crafts or whatever, play pranks. Um and so everyone had this like these elves that would do things for them and they would come to school, um, they would like come to school with like books that their elves made, or um like fucking can I curse? Fucking um fuckiiiiiiing-that one had like 7 ‘i’s in it, you better put all of these in-fucking like food. So obviously these elves didn’t exist, they weren’t real but, um, all the parents were like really close and everyone that had them-well ok I guess I exaggerated when I said that everyone had them, um but basically only the popular bitches had them but they were the only ones we talked about-but all of their moms were suuuper close so they all like knew these elves and how to move them around and so they kind of did it as like a group thing. But like I found about these elves and me being the little twat I was [laughs] I wanted to be cool, I was like “Mom I want these elves” and like um my mom wasn’t, wasn’t cool she wasn’t a cool mom I wasn’t a cool kid so she didn’t like um she didn’t get in with the crowd so she didn’t know about these elves! But so she got these elves and then presented them to me in the box to which they were shipped to her in but in reality you were supposed to present them on the fireplace like open and like um with crackers or something like that, but she gave them to me in the box. But luckily my brother knew about this tradition so he like moved them around for me and stuff so I still got the experience.

 

Context:

 

The conversation was recorded while in the room of the interviewee. She was fixing up her room while I was sitting and listening to her folklore. This folklore item was a local tradition that lasted about two years in the neighborhood of Marietta. It was enacted by elementary school kids from the grades of 4th to 5th grade, at the time.

 

Background:

 

The interviewee was born in China but raised in Marietta, Georgia. She is a sophomore at the University of Southern California, studying Communication. Her mother and father are both from the United States, and have lived in Georgia for many years.

 

Analysis:

 

This folklore item is very interesting because it is not only one that is particular to a specific region, it was also carried out by one specific group: the popular children’s parents. It also left as quickly as it arrived. Additionally, the tale of the interviewee’s brother enacting the tradition that the parents were unaware of was heartwarming, as well as it being an example of how easily folklore can be lost when it is attempted by an outgroup. Therefore, this piece is actually a great example of a regional folk tradition, needing specific in-group knowledge.