Category Archives: Rituals, festivals, holidays

Indian Dancing Ritual

Nationality: Indian
Age: 18
Occupation: Student
Residence: Dubai, United Arab Emirates
Performance Date: 3/23/18
Primary Language: Hindi (urdu)
Language: English

Collection:  Indian wedding dances – groom’s side

During a discussion about Indian weddings, the informant mentioned that the groom is not allowed to see the bride before the ceremony. On the day of the ceremony, the groom and his family travel to the bride in an extravagant dancing parade which symbolizes him claiming her as his wife.

Context/Interpretation: Folk dancing is performed for various reasons, and in this case, the dance portrays a traditional action. Further, dancing at wedding is a pretty universal concept, however this dancing demonstration signifies a deeper meaning which the the initiation into marriage. This dance is rite of passage ritual.

 

Finland Sauna Preparation

Nationality: Finnish
Age: 32
Occupation: Dogsled Guide
Residence: Kittila, Finland
Performance Date: 3/18/18
Primary Language: Finnish
Language: English

The steps listed outline the methods for preparing a traditional Finnish sauna, something I observed from a local guide and later performed myself multiple times during a 7-day excursion in the Lapland area of northern Finland during the winter months.

 

The excursion itself centered around driving teams of dogs from point to point over a 200+ km journey, with stopping points each night at small cabins. This being the wilderness, there is no running water or electricity.

 

At each cabin there would be a small adjoining building housing a sauna. In place of showering, the sauna is used to clean oneself before retiring to bed.

 

Preparing the sauna for use involves gathering small bits of wood, often required to be split from logs supplied from a woodshed and using them to fire up the sauna’s stove. The heat from the stove subsequently heats up coals that, when water is poured over them, feed steam into the sauna. Given that the coals take approximately 45 minutes to heat properly, water is then gathered from an adjacent source, typically a lake (Finland’s marshy, water-dotted landscape provides ideal terrain for this).

 

By winter, however, this water is frozen many inches thick and covered in feet of snow. Therefore, retrieving the necessary amounts of water takes considerable effort:

 

A sled bearing three large buckets (around 3ft tall) is brought to a large hole in the ice that is left covered when not in use, preserving the hole from freezing shut. A heavy wooden pick with a metallic end (overall resembling a spear) is used to clear whatever thin layer of ice is in the way. The three buckets are then filled bit by bit (using smaller buckets) until full. Two buckets are brought to the sauna, the other to the cabin to be used for drinking water.

 

In the sauna, the two buckets of freezing lake water are set aside as sources for the coals and for personal washing. A metal kettle sitting over the stove is then filled to be brought to a boil.

 

The sauna itself is constructed almost entirely from wood, with the floorboards evenly spaced out as to allow water to seep through and be funneled outside. Two tiers of wooden benches line one side. Considering that hot air rises, choosing the higher or lower bench is a matter of heat preference. Water is then poured onto the now-hot coals using a wooden ladle. The more water is poured, the more steam is produced. And therefore, the room becomes hotter, prompting greater amounts of sweat from the body. How much water is poured is another matter of preference.

 

Finnish custom involves entering the sauna nude, often times with a beer. Sharing the space with others, men or women, is not considered a taboo, and conversation between occupants is a typical tool to pass the time more easily. However, communal occupancy is not entirely expected, as one may request individual privacy in the sauna to no insult.

 

When one is finished, often known once the body is completely covered in sweat (a process that generally takes 30 minutes), one then stands over the drainage floorboards and douses themselves with a mixture of the adjacent freezing lake water and boiling kettle water. Once the sweat is completely washed away, it is time to dry off, re-dress and return to the cabin. However, it is also another alternative Finnish custom to either jump in the lake (if safe and if there is a place to enter) or roll around in the snow, as opposed to dousing oneself with water.

 

Although the prevalence of the sauna is a mainstay of outsider’s perceptions of Finnish culture, understanding it as a substitute for showers/running water in wilderness areas illustrates a purpose originally rooted in practical function, not mere leisure (as the sauna’s centrality to luxurious spas in the Western hemisphere might initially lead one to believe). However, with the custom of drinking a beer or holding conversations while steaming, one could argue that the Finns have allowed a distinct concession of leisure to their system of bathing.

Mother’s Witty Toast

Nationality: USA
Age: 20
Occupation: Student
Residence: San Francisco, CA
Performance Date: 4/10/18
Primary Language: English

The following is a recollection of a slightly drunken toast given by a friend’s mother. I had seen a video clipping of his mother giving the toast on the social media application Snapchat, although I could not understand what was being said (although it was quite clear from the many empty glasses of wine beside her what libations had led into the toast itself).

 

When I next saw my friend, I asked him out of curiosity what the specifics of the toast were. He indicated that it is a witty one his mother frequently gives at particular family outings when all six of his siblings are present at the table.

 

This particular toast was aimed at the eldest brother, who had just welcomed a newborn son (his first child) with his wife.

 

My friend’s imparting of his mother’s toast went as follows:

 

Here’s to you, as good as you are. Here’s to me, as bad as I am. And as bad as I am, you’re as good as you are. And as good as you are, I’m as bad as I am.

 

A common trait seen in toasts is a subtle mixture of humor and seriousness. Being a proclamation of goodwill towards the subject (or subjects), the overall message usually bears a heartfelt sentimentality meant to outweigh any teasing or foolery that precedes it.

 

What is distinct of this toast, in particular, is a cheeky admission regarding each side’s tendency towards good and bad, with an exclusive insistence of ‘good’ on the side of the subject and an exclusive insistence of ‘bad’ on the side of the presenter.

 

Despite the presenter painting themselves as bad, the repetition that makes up the bulk of the toast indicates this in a manner more celebratory than derogatory and only made possible/acceptable by the good of the subject balancing out the bad of the other.

 

In this, both sides of good and bad are made necessary by their pairing together.

Yiddish Prayer for the Dead

Nationality: USA
Age: 73
Occupation: Architect
Residence: Los Angeles, CA
Performance Date: 3/24/18
Primary Language: Yiddish
Language: English

The following is a prayer, the traditional Jewish prayer for the dead, as given by my godfather on the birthday of my late brother.

 

As he explained, the prayer is usually reserved for the day of the deceased’s passing. However, given that my late brother’s passing came only two weeks after his birthday, and the fact that my godfather and I would not be able to see each other on that date, he opted for conducting the prayer on the birthday night instead.

 

The same prayer was given a number of weeks the year prior after my brother’s actual passing. Although my godfather gave the prayer in the presence of his own family on that day, he repeated it during a visit on my behalf.

 

Given before seating at dinner, the prayer is repeated each consecutive year onward. However, it is reserved for kin, not given for friends and familiar faces.

 

Standing at the dinner table with our food before us, my godfather proceeded to recite the prayer (from memory), in its original Yiddish, which is also his first language:

 

Yitgaddal veyitqaddash shmeh rabba. Be’alma di vra khir’uteh. Veyamlikh malkhuteh, behayekhon uvyomekhon uvhaye dekhol bet Yisrael, be’agala uvizman qariv. Ve’imru: Amen.

 

Yehe shmeh rabba mevarakh le’alam ul’alme ‘almaya.

 

Yitbarakh veyishtabbah veyitpaar veyitromam veyitnasse veyithaddar veyit’alleh veyithallal shmeh dequdsha berikh hu. Le’ella min kol birkhata veshiratea tushbehata venehemata daamiran be’alma. Ve’imru: Amen.

 

Titqabbal tzelotehon uva’utehon d’khol bet Yisrael qodam avuhon di bishmayya. Ve’imru: Amen.

 

Yehe shelama rabba min shemayya, vehayyim ‘alainu v’al kol Yisrael. Ve’imru: Amen.

 

O’she shalom bimromav, hu ya’ase shalom ‘alenu, v’al kol Yisra’el. Ve’imru: Amen.

 

After this point, he took out a small candle and lit it, explaining that after the prayer, the candle is allowed to burn for 24 hours, and then extinguished.

 

The candle was then set in the center of the dining table. However, he explained, tradition does not call for the candle to be placed anywhere in particular. Given that the prayer is said before seating for the dinner meal, it is most often placed among where the meal is being eaten as a matter of simple convenience.

 

Following the recitation of the prayer and the lighting of the candle, we sat and ate.

At the same time next year, it will be done once more.

 

The English translation of the prayer has been included:

 

“Exalted and hallowed be His great Name.

 

Throughout the world which He has created according to His Will. May He establish His kingship, bring forth His redemption and hasten the coming of His Moshiach.

 

In your lifetime and in your days and in the lifetime of the entire House of Israel, sword, famine and death shall cease from us and from the entire Jewish nation, speedily and soon, and say, Amen.

 

May His great Name be blessed forever and to all eternity. Blessed and praised, glorified, exalted, and extolled, honored, adored and lauded be the Name of the Holy One, blessed be He.

 

Beyond all the blessings, hymns, praises and consolations that are uttered in the world, and say, Amen.

 

Upon Israel, and upon our sages, and upon their disciples, and upon all the disciples of their disciples, and upon all those who occupy themselves with the Torah, here or in any other place, upon them and upon you, may there be abundant peace, grace, kindness, compassion, long life, ample sustenance and deliverance, from their Father in heaven; and say, Amen.

 

May there be abundant peace from heaven, and a good life for us and for all Israel; and say, Amen.

 

He who makes peace in His heavens, may He make peace for us and for all Israel, and say, Amen.”

 

 

What is interesting to note about the prayer itself is that it does not acknowledge the dead at all and is instead entirely an exaltation towards God. The significance of the prayer is undeniable given its exclusive reservation for family members, but to not mention death at all might prompt a double glance.

 

My uncle explained this as an almost humorous consideration, but elaborated that the absence of mentioning death in a prayer whose very purpose centers on it is that remembrance is almost implied, and that a reminder of the person’s passing is not necessary. I found it noteworthy, then, that the traditional prayer for the dead draws the entirety of its significance in the symbolism of its name and subsequent use, with the actual components of the prayer itself important to a lesser degree.

 

A topic that is often joked upon between my godfather and me is the fact that I am an Episcopalian Christian, and he a Russian Orthodox Jew. It is interesting to consider, then that such a highly specialized and ritualistic prayer may be conducted between members of two religions with a distinct barrier between them. In this case, circumstances of love supersede those of preconceived notions of theological leanings.

Bible Study Prayer

Nationality: Nicaraguan
Age: 22
Occupation: Student
Residence: Los Angeles
Performance Date: 4/12/18
Primary Language: Spanish
Language: English

Each Wednesday, I meet with a small group of fellow university students for a peer-led Bible study at the USC Catholic Center. Each week has a similar layout in terms of procedure, although in this particular meeting, the primary topic was centered and prayer for the recent passing of a close friend and classmate. Because her death greatly affected many of my fellow classmates (and needless to say, her family, who I also knew), much of the prayers given were subsequently aimed in consideration of these others.

 

The following frames the course of a typical Bible-study meeting procedure, although in the case of an exceptional incident:

 

The same eight members of the study meet in the same room, a quiet second-floor conference area, each week beginning at 6:50 p.m., and lasting for around 45 minutes to an hour. Our study’s leader, Javier, had brought me into the group the preceding year. He starts the session having already brought a dealing of snack foods (Oreos, chips & dip, etc.), seating the members around a circular table.

 

The meeting is formally started with the members bowing their heads, crossing their hearts, and reciting in unison the ‘Hail Mary’ traditional catholic prayer, which goes as follows:

 

Hail Mary, full of grace. The Lord is with thee.
Blessed art thou amongst women, and blessed is the fruit of thy womb, Jesus.
Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners, now and at the hour of our death. Amen.

 

Each member then goes one-by-one relaying their personal ‘highs and lows’ since the last meeting, followed by an ‘coming to God moment,’ meant to illustrate an incidence or realization of spirituality and faith.

 

At this point in the meeting, the leader then transitions to a pre-selected lesson, involving the reading of a particular passage of scripture that exemplifies the day’s lesson, followed by a group discussion of what in the passage stood out during the reading, what conclusions they have drawn, or otherwise. This day’s topic involved a passage from the book of Philippians (2: 5-8),  that highlights the humbled passage of Jesus through the realm of man by taking on the form of a man himself.

 

Two smaller, supplementary readings are typically held that reinforce the day’s lesson. However, the leader took the opportunity to discuss the topic of my passed friend, which I had disclosed to him earlier. The group then held a loose discussion of life and death from their various points of view.

 

Each meeting is subsequently closed with an extended prayer from the leader himself. He took the opportunity to center it exclusively on the topic of the passed friend.

 

While the circumstances did not figure appropriate to record the prayer in its entirety, the leader’s points of acknowledgment and hearkening to God included my own emotional health, that of the deceased parents and her friends/classmates at school, as well as for potential victims of suicide (given that these were the circumstances under which she passed).

 

Perhaps the most important aspect of this particular meeting to analyze is the adaptation of a group’s normal schedule to briefly accommodate and address a member’s trying circumstances. In this case, it was to provide a sense of comfort and counsel by means of spirituality, along with the personalization of holding it among people familiar with each other.

 

The leader’s extended prayer stood out to me the most, for unlike the established prayer recited at the start of each meeting, this prayer was devised entirely in the moment, lasting for a total of five uninterrupted minutes devoid of ‘ums’ or silences in thought.

 

A small, but important point that can also be acknowledged in the general scheme of the meetings is the inclusion of snacks as an attracting factor. By providing food, the study leader is able to provide an incentive for members to arrive and enjoy treats, but also to keep hands and minds from wandering or growing idle during/in between each topic of study.