Tag Archives: memory

Borrowed Keys

Nationality: American/Mexican
Age: 19
Occupation: Student
Residence: West Covina, CA
Language: English/Spanish

TEXT: “When I was a lot younger, my grandfather passed away, and I was heartbroken. I tried not to remember him so I wouldn’t get sad and start crying, but when that wouldn’t work, my mom started a wholesome joke to keep his memory alive. Anytime someone would misplace something or lose it, she would say, “Abuelo probably borrowed it”. It was a little thing that meant a lot, since he would always misplace things or lose them and borrow other people’s instead. One morning, I was looking for my keys, since we needed to leave for a family dinner, and I couldn’t find them for the life of me. I looked all around my room and our house, but no luck. As I finished checking our kitchen and living room, I headed back up to my room in hopes of finding them, and there they were. My keys were sitting on my desk when I walked back in, and when I told my mom, she laughed and said, “Abuelo’s always around”.

CONTEXT: This short personal narrative describes the quiet impact of grief and the small, meaningful ways families keep loved ones present after they’ve passed. The narrator recalls the death of their grandfather during childhood and how that early loss brought emotional difficulty. In response, the narrator’s mother introduces a gentle family tradition: joking that “Abuelo probably borrowed it” whenever something goes missing. This phrase becomes a wholesome coping mechanism that transforms grief into connection.

ANALYSIS: This memorate serves as a wholesome example of how families create small traditions that keep the memory of loved ones alive. The informant’s family marked the moment of loss in a gentle way by saying something meaningful that offered a small comfort, “Abuelo probably borrowed it.” The missing keys provide a bit of mystery, but it’s less about animating the dead and more about how memory, love, and belief intersect and interact in daily life. The mom’s response is an indication of how this small ritual comforts the grieving family and allows the grandfather to still have a presence in the family narrative, even though he has passed.

Dahlias for Tía

Nationality: American/Mexican
Age: 19
Occupation: Student
Residence: West Covina, CA
Language: English/Spanish

TEXT: “My tia (aunt) had a thing for dahlia flowers. Whenever we would walk around together and see Dahlia flowers, she would stop, pick one, smell it, and put it in her hat. Her house in Puebla, Mexico, always smelled of flowers, and she would never hesitate to have a bouquet of dahlias and roses in her entrance way. If she were sitting on the couch watching the news or reading her favorite books, she would be tending to her garden in the backyard. She passed away 2 years ago, but last year for Día de los Muertos, we planted Dahlias in her honor. The thing with Dahlia’s is that they take a long time to bloom. They don’t bloom for at least 90 days after planting. It was still a little cold in Puebla when we planted them, but one morning, about a month after we planted them, my dad opened up the kitchen window, and the air was thick with their scent even though they shouldn’t have bloomed yet. The smell was so strong it felt like she was with us again.”


CONTEXT: This memorate of the dahlia flowers and his aunt was told to by B, in the context of a bigger conversation about family traditions and cultural practices related to memorializing the deceased. B connected it with their tía from Puebla, Mexico, who had a love for dahlia flowers, and that association became part of the family observance of Día de los Muertos. By planting dahlias in the tía’s honor, the family was creating a cultural tradition that added meaning to a person they lost, while performing a cultural practice and making it personal with the memory of that deceased person.

ANALYSIS: This is a good example of how Día de los Muertos provides families comfort and connection to their loved ones who have passed. The informant’s tía had a strong relationship with dahlias, so planting dahlias was associated with honoring her. The dahlias weren’t supposed to bloom yet, but the random nature of their blooming and the smell felt like a sign, a reminder of her presence. The story does not attempt to explain the moment so much as describe how it felt. In addition, it shows how cultural rituals, like Día de los Muertos, can keep the memory of others alive through symbols, emotions, and shared experiences.

New Mexico Skinwalker

Nationality: American
Age: 20
Occupation: Boat Mechanic
Residence: Glendale, AZ
Language: English

Story

In New Mexico, the informant visited the reservation with his Native friends. They decided to go out to hike a mountain at 7pm; the informant was with two friends and his friend’s cousin who he never met before. All of a sudden, it became pitch dark, no moon, no stars, no nothing, and the cousin went missing. They called for her for about a half hour. She came stumbling out of the dark with no recollection of anything that happened, so they thought “maybe a skinwalker or something was trying to lure her” according to the informant.

Context: The informant visited a Native American reservation in New Mexico around the ages 15-16 years old.

Analysis: This personal narrative follows a grander cultural phenomenon to explain the unexplainable. The sky went completely dark, which provides a supernatural backdrop to the story. The idea of nothing in the sky, not even stars, must have been terrifying for the group of teenagers. Suddenly, one of the group members goes missing and they frantically call out and search for her, strengthening the fear for the group as anything could have happened to her. When she finally stumbled out to them, she was disoriented with no memory of where she was for the last thirty minutes. Naturally, the group needed a way to explain what had happened that night. Although the informant was unsure of which reservation he had visited, he had likely visited the Navajo Nation or one of the surrounding reservations that are clustered together in New Mexico. Skinwalkers are a well-known legend in these areas, especially with them being a Navajo legend. This would have the quickest and easiest way for the teenagers to explain this experience. Skinwalkers are an evil witch who shapeshifts and lures people, likely to their deaths. Since the cousin had returned disoriented with no memory, she could have been lured and placed under the spell of a skinwalker and somehow escaped back to the group. 

The Botanist

Nationality: caucasion
Age: ~70
Occupation: Retiree (Former College Alumni Director)
Residence: Altadena, CA
Performance Date: Apr 14
Primary Language: English

This is a legend the informant tells when reminded of either botany or memories. She learned it at some point while working in the administration of a college (she cannot recall which)

Story:

Okay, so the story is that there was a um… botanist who was a professor at Stanford university, and he became president of the university, and in his inauguration he said that he was going to learn the names off all the students on campus. So, the first few months, he went around campus, shaking hands with all of the students and trying to learn their names and working very hard at it. And then after a few months, his staff noticed that he’d kind of stopped doing that. And, so, they ask him very gently uh “Professor, why have you stopped doing this?” And he says, “Well, I’m a botanist and the trouble is, every time I learned the name of a student, I forgot the name of a plant!”

The informant told the story after I had mentioned that I used to remember certain things that I had since forgotten. She likely told it to inform as to the importance of prioritizing what one memorizes because the mind only has room for so much information.