Actions speak louder than words – Proverb

Nationality: American
Age: 57
Occupation: Dance Studio Owner
Residence: Downers Grove, IL
Language: English

Text:

Actions speak louder than words

Context:

My informant told me she used to say this a lot when she worked in management. She would tell other employees this proverb so they would have agency with their work and towards their careers. In those instances, she wanted her employees to understand that them saying they will get a task done is not the same as them actually getting the task done. She nows says this proverb to her children as a way to inspire them to take action in their lives.

Analysis:

The metaphor within this proverb is really powerful. Someone can say they are going to do something, but until their actions align with their words, their words hold no power. This is especially true when someone’s actions directly oppose what they’re saying. Although actions do not speak, they signal the person’s intention to others. Many people say things they do not mean or make promises they never follow through. People’s actions and decisions give meaning to the words they say.

Nothing in life is free, cause you’ll pay some other way – Proverb

Nationality: American
Age: 22
Occupation: College Student
Residence: Los Angeles, CA
Language: English

Text:

Nothing in life is free, cause you’ll pay some other way

Context:

My informant uses this proverb with her friends and family. She gave the scenario of her friend flirting with a stranger at the bar to get a free drink. My informant said this proverb to her friend after she returned with her free drink.

Analysis:

When my informant gave me this proverb, I recognized the first part (“Nothing in life is free”). However, I was not familiar with the latter half of the proverb. I have heard variations of this proverb, such as “Everything has a cost,” and I have always found it interesting. Even if someone does not have to use their money to get something, they have to pay for the thing with their time and energy instead. In the case of my informant’s friend, although she did not have to use her money to buy herself a drink, she “paid” the other person with her time and energy talking to them. It makes people reflect on what form of payment is more valuable: money or time and energy.

You can’t always get what you want – Folk Speech

Nationality: American
Age: 22
Occupation: College Student
Residence: Los Angeles, CA
Language: English

Text:

You can’t always get what you want

Context:

My informant told me that her parents used to tell her this as a kid. A scenario she provided was when she and her sister disagreed on how to do something and my informant did the task her own way with no regard for what her sister wanted. Her parents said this phrase to her to help her understand that not everything in life will go her way, and therefore she needed to learn how to compromise and adjust accordingly.

Analysis:

This phrase became popular when The Rolling Stones released the song “You Can’t Always Get What You Want” in 1969. There is a legend that Mick Jagger heard this phrase at a bar after a concert in Minnesota, although it was never verified. For people who know this song, this phrase would be considered a reference to The Rolling Stones. What I find interesting, though, is that when I used to hear my parents use this phrase, I was not aware that they were quoting a song. I thought this phrase was a proverb/a kind of folk speech, and I’m probably not alone in that thought. It will be interesting to see how as time goes on, if younger generations will know this phrase as a “reference to that one Rolling Stones song” or if it will only be known as a phrase that parents/older people use with children.

Jail

Nationality: American
Age: 22
Occupation: Student
Language: English

Text:

Jail 

Context:

My informant first heard this saying on social media when she was in high school. She either will simply state “jail” or say that someone “deserves jail” for something that they either said or did. It is often used when people say something unexpected, strange, offensive, etc. 

Analysis:

This slang word or term is used in casual conversation to convey a form of shock or disbelief, most likely used around friends. It builds on the sentiment that someone said something or did something that was so unbelievable that they deserve to spend time in jail as a result of their actions. The use of this phrase would only make sense in a culture where there is a criminal justice system and amongst people who are often on social media sites where phrases like this are often used. 

Hang around the barbershop and you’ll end up with a haircut

Nationality: American
Age: 50
Occupation: Home Renovator
Residence: Los Angeles
Language: English

Text:

Hang around the barbershop and you’ll end up with a haircut

Context:

My informant likely learned through American television shows, as the informant moved to America in his teenage years. The informant frequently says this to his children, especially when it comes to warning them about spending too much time with people who are not a good influence. In particular, he uses it to warn his daughters not to spend too much time with guys who would not be a good boyfriend, because he feels that the more time you spend with someone, the harder it will be to not develop feelings or forming a relationship. My informant changes the way he says this phrase occasionally, with the addition or omission of a few words, but the sentiment remains the same. 

Analysis:

The exact origin of this saying is unknown. It is typically used as a form of advice, warning people about the company they keep or the environments they put themselves in. This saying would likely be most appropriate in culture where people are taught to be wary of their surroundings. Barbershops are where men go to get a haircut, therefore going to the barbershop and not getting a haircut is seen as unlikely and illogical. The proverb warns individuals that even if you think you are immune to being influenced or changed by your surroundings, spending more time will increase your chance of such. While the connotation is typically negative or used to scare people, it can possibly be used in a positive manner to encourage persistence at a certain task or goal.