Tag Archives: wedding

Thai Wedding Traditions

Nationality: Thai
Age: 25
Occupation: Student
Residence: Los Angeles
Performance Date: March 21st, 2013
Primary Language: English
Language: Thai

Informant Background: The individual was born in Bangkok, Thailand. She grew up there and still has family in Thailand. She said her family origin is Chinese. Her family still performs a lot of Chinese traditions such as: Chinese New Year, Ancestry Day, etc. Being in Thailand her family also practice a lot of the Thai traditions. She does not speak Chinese but she does speak Thai and English. She currently lives in Los Angeles to go to school. She has been travelling back and forth between the United States and Thailand constantly throughout the years because her family still resides in Bangkok.

 

Weddings in Thailand most of the time happens in one day. But there are different approach es depending on the size of the family.

Okay if you have a small family sometimes you would just go to the government building, you know like city hall here, and just dress semi-nice and get married there. They will sign the paper and then be done with it.

Bigger family usually dedicate the whole day for this event. Oh, way before the wedding day there are usually a lot of stuff the bride and the groom would do. Usually the bride will find her dress…usually people do both traditional Thai clothing in white with the western wedding gown type of thing…The bride and the groom would then have a photo session where they take photos in their wedding clothes in some nice place…some people do it at where they met, or a park, or a photo studio and what not. Some people even do different wedding themes…sometimes even casual clothes…some people even do their old school uniform you know…it really depends on the couple.

On the actual wedding day the day would starts with the groom and his family marching with money, food, and valuables to the bride’s house. Oh, the wedding usually takes place there. The groom and his group of people would sing songs as they march along. The size of the march depends on the groom’s family, friends, and relatives. They would have some Thai musical instruments. It’s like a marching band you know some wind instrument, drums, etc. And then these songs would be songs you only sing on weddings. The songs usually talks about how wedding is this idea of trading between family…the lyrics would be like “if you have lemons, you can trade for lime, if you have a daughter, you can trade for a son”…it’s kind of funny but most people still do it today.

Once the groom arrives he is faced with what we called “gate.” These “gates” are usually made by children of the bride’s family holding a string on two ends prohibiting the groom to see the bride. The groom would then have to give the children envelop with money inside. The number of “gate” depends on the number of children in the bride’s family. Sometimes the friends of the bride would set up the “gate” as a dare for the groom where he has to do jump rope, drink weird stuff, or push-ups to pass. It’s almost like a prank.

After that then the groom can see the bridge and the ceremony will then start. The two will be on their knees in front of the invited guests… And then the bride and the groom put their hands out on top of a small pedestal where the adults of both family pour water into their hands…while pouring the water the adult give consent, advice, and wishes to the bride and the groom…This usually begins with the oldest family members to the youngest. Sometimes close elderly guests participate as well.

After that the bride and the groom can sign the marriage papers stuff. Sometimes you can even book the government officials from your district to be at this event so they can bring you the paper to sign…so you know you don’t have to go to city hall to sign before or after the wedding day…so everything can happen on the same day.

There is also certain district with good names that people want to get married in. The most popular is this district called “Bang-Rak” which translates to something like “area of love” or “place of love” or you know something like that. This district is so popular that people would go there to get married even though they live like an hour away.

Oh, usually after the traditional Thai stuff the bride and the groom would change into the more Western wedding clothes…you known tux and gown…for their wedding reception with dancing, food, and cake.  

This is a common Thai marriage tradition observed by the informant. The march with valuables represents the groom’s family size and wealth. It also symbolizes how these valuables is the bride’s price, or how much the groom is paying the bride’s family. The march differs in scale from less than ten people to about a hundred. The “gate” serves the same purpose to present obstacle for the groom and how he must have wealth to get the bride. And that the value of the bride come at a price where the groom must be willing to pay and does to get to her. The adults play an important role as they give consent and pass on wisdom to the next generation. Having the oldest member of the family start the ceremony also reflects the value of the elders in the Thai culture. This is also a ritual where both sides of the family can get to know each other, especially the older generation, to create the joining of two families.

Since there are many religions practiced in Thailand, sometimes the wedding takes place in multiple forms to accommodate different believes. The informant said that since the traditional Thai wedding ceremony ritual stems from Buddhist traditions, those usually occur in the morning with close family. Then the reception will take place at night where all invited guests, family and friends, attend. The reception is then host more similar to the American wedding reception with food and music, and the wedding cake.

 

 

This wedding ritual, in my opinion, reflects how the importance of marriage transcends the bride and the groom. The march of the groom singing songs involves a small community. It shows how so many people have to come together for the two people. It also shows wealth and connection within the community. The dare by the bride’s family shows how her strong family ties and emphasizes this idea of trading the bride through money and wealth. The kneeling before adults shows the importance of the older generation to the new and upcoming generation. The ritual shows how the importance of the wedding day focuses as much on the people around the bride and the groom in comparison to the bride and the groom themselves.

Without the traditions the bride and the groom can just go to city hall and get married legally as the informant pointed out some small family would do. But I can see the importance of the wedding becoming an event that is for the micro-community. The legality of the day is much less importance than the traditions performed on the day.

The different traditions also show how the local tradition is infused with the international tradition. Having both shows how the people want to keep on their tradition while being open to new ones.

The photos taken before the wedding seems very strange in my opinion. As seen in many wedding traditions the day is deemed as very exclusive, sacred, and sometimes religious. The clothes that the bride and the groom wear at wedding are also exclusive to the day. I feel that to take photos before the actual day in wedding apparel loses the importance of the actual wedding day.

Mother Daughter wedding traditions in Hong Kong

Nationality: American
Age: 24
Occupation: Student
Residence: Los Angeles
Performance Date: April 13th, 2013
Primary Language: English
Language: Cantonese

Informant Background: The informant is originally from Hong Kong. She now lives permanently in the United States but travels back once a year to visit her relatives in Hong Kong. She speaks both Cantonese and English. Her family practices many of the Chinese traditions, folk-beliefs, and superstitions. She celebrates many of the Chinese holidays through cooking of special “holiday food.”

 

On the wedding day, before the wedding, the bride’s mother will comb the bride’s hair three times… I think the first time is so that the couple will love each other forever. Then second is so the bride can have one child per year… And third is that the bride and groom will grow old together.

The informant learned about this through her aunt and observations of the weddings she attended in Hong Kong. According to the informant this is a common Chinese wedding ritual. She said it is usually a time shared privately by mother and daughter only.

 

I think this tradition clearly reflects how wedding is more than about the bride and the groom coming together but also their relative and other people in their lives. In this case it is the ties between the mother and the daughter. This is similar to Western traditions where the mother would help the bride get ready for the ceremony in a separate room hidden from the crowd.

The bride’s mother is passing down the knowledge and wisdom. The first blessing is so that the bride and groom will have the unconditional love as her family. The second reflects how the older generation wants the next generation to keep continuing the bloodline through children. It also reflects how marriage is about celebrating reproduction through different metaphors. The third is for the bride and groom to grow old with grey hair together. I think the combing of the hair reflects this idea of beauty since women tends to grow their hair longer than men. Hair color also reflects a person’s age through color. This tradition has the element of the number three which occurs in many cultures through different rituals.

Wedding ritual is a way to always strengthen the ties between the older and younger generation, and younger generation to the next generation. This tradition then keep the mother involve before losing her daughter to the other family. The combing of the hair is also an act a mother would perform when the daughter was younger; this is a way of bringing closure before they say their goodbyes.

Tuxedo Nights

Nationality: American
Age: 58
Occupation: Hotel Owner/Manager
Residence: Nashville, TN
Performance Date: 3/20/2013
Primary Language: English

“If you want to have a wedding at night in Nashville, you have to wear a tuxedo.”

The informant was told this from his mother and father in law.  The reason that they gave him was that that’s just what you do.  The informant is from New York, and he wanted to wear a Giorgio Armani suit for the wedding.  “I didn’t want to wear a tuxedo.”  His in-laws told him that if he wanted to wear the suit that he could have the wedding on a Sunday afternoon because at night weddings, he had to wear a tuxedo.

The informant ended up getting married on Sunday night so he had to wear a tuxedo.  He told the story with a bit of resentment under his voice, and he ended saying that “it doesn’t apply anymore, but it did apparently, according to them.”

This tradition of wearing a tuxedo stuck with him because he hadn’t been allowed to do what he wanted to because of previously existing tradition.  Because he was joining a new family, he had to go along with their traditions instead of doing what he had wanted, and he still holds on to a tiny grudge for it.  The folkloric ritual held strong on this occasion.

 

Jumping the Broom

Nationality: African American

The setting is my bedroom. My informant is a close friend of mine that lives down the hall from me. This is the same informant as the Edgar Allen Poe entry.My informant is from Maryland, but grew up moving around the country.  “Jumping the broom” is a practice that comes up in African American culture. My informant says that this tradition is something that she heard from her mother, but it is also something that she has simply known about for most of her life.

I: Before African Americans could afford weddings slash their weddings were recognized by the government and they were slaves umm to constitute your marriage they would both jump over a broomstick together. “Jumping the broom” was the saying. And some people still do it for the traditional aspect of it. It is kind of passed down from generation to generation. And that’s a saying that comes up in black culture a lot because of that, jumping the broom

Rebecca: Do you know anyone that has done this?

I: My mom’s first cousin and his wife

Rebecca: Who told you about this?

I: I think my mom did but I honestly don’t remember because it comes up so much and I was around it a lot growing up

Rebecca: What does the story mean to you?
I: I think its just an interesting story and I think its cool that it has that cultural sentiment. The idea behind it is that you are “sweeping” away the old and bringing in the new, so like when people get married it is like a new beginning. Once the couple jumps over the broom, it is a transition or joining of the families.

A common theme among my collections is that my informants either heard the stories from their parents, or just assume that they did because they have always known about the story. This idea comes up a lot in African American culture according to my informant, so she hears about it a lot. My analysis of this wedding tradition relates to our class discussion. It seems to represent the liminal period between being married and single, and the broom acts like this division. Jumping over the broom together indicates that the couple is jumping out of the single life, and into their married life as a couple.

Annotation 1: Charles Dickens’ novel Great Expectations references a couple being married “over the broomstick.”

Citation: Dickens, Charles. Great Expectations. New York: Dodd, Mead, 1942.

Annotation 2: “Jumping the Broom” is also a romantic comedy released in 2011 where two African American families come together for a wedding, which ends up being multiple weddings. The film actually does involve a physical broom that one bride gives to her friend as an apology at the end of the film. Both couples jump the broom after their wedding ceremony.

Food: Ras Malai

Nationality: American-Indian(from India not Native American)
Age: 20
Occupation: Graduate Student
Residence: Los Angeles
Performance Date: March 26, 2013
Primary Language: English
Language: limited Spanish

Ras Malai- it’s dessert reserved for special occasions. The dish starts out as a mixture sweet milk with pistachios.  It is cooked with saffron and sugar. Lastly, a sweet baked cheese mixture(she couldn’t remember the name) is added to the sweet milk.

My informant states that the last time she had this dish was when her cousin got married. Whenever a couple gets married they go to the mother’s brother’s house for dinner shortly after the wedding.  This is special occasion because its supposed to welcome the couple to the family. At this dinner there are a lot of special foods served. At this dinner the informant’s mother made most of the food. However the informant’s father generally makes this dish on special occasions. The dish does not have to be made by anyone in particular. It’s a dish that’s generally saved for special occasions, especially if their related to weddings. However the dish is also served in fancy restaurants so its not purely a ceremonial dish.

This dinner reminds me of a concept we learned in class. When a person gets married they are marrying the whole family. I find it interesting that the dinner takes place at a member of the extended families house. In contrast to western society(at least in my experience) where important dinners are reserved for members of the nuclear family unless it’s a reunion or Thanksgiving.