Tag Archives: family

Toss of the bouquet

Date_of_performance: 04/25/2025

Informant Name: FR

Language: English 

Nationality: American

Occupation: Student/Vaulting Coach

Primary Language: English

Residence: Westwood

INTERVIEW:

I recently went to my cousin’s wedding in the beginning of April, I guess you can call that recently. One thing that I saw my cousin do after they got married during the reception, was toss the bouquet to the crowd. I knew what it meant, but my younger sister was confused why she did that, so we talked to my mom about it and this is what she said is the meaning of it: “Usually, at traditional weddings, brides will through the bouquet towards family and friends who gather on the dance floor and the person who catches it, if they are single or in a relationship, it would mean they would get married next. It usually surrounds women guests. It basically symbolizes good luck and love in your future relationships. It doesn’t mean it will actually happen, it is supposed to be a lighthearted and fun game where the person who catches the bouquet could get teased and to put pressure on their partner to make a move.” I found this interesting that the bride is willing to make the wedding about someone else and the excitement of them possibly getting married instead of wanting to keep all of the attention of them and their partner and how they just got married. I think my cousin did to keep the wedding ritual alive because it is to normalized to do the bouquet toss at weddings, you get peer pressured to do the traditions that your parents did before you because it is seen as the norm and what everyone should do. I just found the idea of tossing a bouquet at your wedding an interesting wedding ritual.

MY ANALYSIS

I agree with FR about how she choose to make her wedding about someone else by tossing the bouquet. I find western wedding traditions so fascinating and how it mostly focused on the women being given away to the man. For example, the dad walking the bride down the isle as a way to “give her away” to the husband. And now tossing the bouquet to the women guests to see if their partner proposes and it is always about heterosexual relationships or weddings. All of the weddings I’ve been too, have mostly been heterosexual weddings (due to my family members mainly being straight) and all of them have done the bouquet toss. But, the traditional aspects of weddings, example the bouquet toss, is rooted in folklore and the idea that the brides are met with rituals before getting married as a way to represent women losing their innocence and/or virginity. The bouquet toss falls under the idea of whoever gets the bouquet is next to lose their innocence by getting married and “belonging” to their partner and possibly losing the individuality they had before.

Christmas Eve ritual

Date_of_performance: 04/27/2025

Informant Name: MR

Language: English 

Nationality: American

Occupation: Teacher

Primary Language: English

Residence: Pasadena

INTERVIEW:

My birthday is on Christmas eve and by that time everyone has their lights up in suspense for Christmas. When I was younger, my parents and I started a tradition (or ritual) o drive to a neighborhood that were having light shows, and go look at the Christmas lights in the car with holiday music playing. It was always at night, so it was a wonderful way to end my birthday and introduce Christmas. It also was a great way to bring my family together, since my father was working a lot of the time, so I will always cherish those times. I loved the tradition so much, that I now do it with my daughters and son. Every Christmas eve, we would go drive to any neighborhood that is putting on an exciting Christmas light show, turn on the Christmas channel so it matches up with the lights and take in the view as we drive through the neighborhood. Christmas time always ends up becoming a stress with the pressure of getting everyone the gift they want, having dinner with the extended family, that it can be hard to find time to take a minute to breathe and actually enjoy what Christmas is all about. And to me, Christmas is all about being with my family, so having this time during my birthday where I can get my daughters and son together to feel the Christmas spirit, is a tradition that I’m always going to try to keep up as a long as I can.

MY ANALYSIS:

Christmas traditions are type of traditions that I hear about the most because it is always so surrounded by family and spending time with family that you want to cherish every moment you can get with them before everything starts to get complicated. Her tradition of seeing Christmas lights, is a great tradition to keep up because it gets everyone excited and is something that everyone can look forward to, so it can be easy for this tradition to stay around or even to make Christmas feel more like the old Christmas we felt as kids, sitting in the back seat while old holiday music plays on the radio, falling asleep as Christmas lights pass by the window, small memories like those is what keeps the joy of Christmas alive. The peace of it all, having something you can look forward to in the year, knowing it will always be there for you to help you get through the months or even through the seasonal/winter depression that may come up.

Christmas tamales

Date_of_performance: 04/28/2025

Informant Name: XM

Language: English/Spanish  

Nationality: Chilean

Occupation: Student

Primary Language: English

Residence: Santa Monica

INTERVIEW:

During every Christmas with my family we would usually eat tamales, not sure why it was tamales, but I was guaranteed a tamale when I went to my family’s house for Christmas. We aren’t Mexican, so I don’t understand, but it is a tradition and it feels with warmth and it was one of my favorite traditions during Christmas because it reminds me of my family and the time we spent together. It reminds me of good memories, makes me happy, and reminds me of home. I miss those christmases spent together as a whole family and when things felt easier as a child.

MY ANALYSIS

Hearing this story reminds me of the nostalgic Christmas when I was younger. How everything felt simple and nothing was changing. People fall into a routine during the holidays especially Christmas, because you are a kid so you go wherever your family goes, so you get used to the repetitive traditions that you create with the family you are with. The interesting concept of traditions, is that they don’t have to make sense on paper, it is something you create with family that you carry with you because it reminds you of home, so even if XM isn’t Mexican, having tamales every Christmas started to be associated with warm and happier memories and that is why traditions are made. It reminds her of her family and the Christmas she spent with them before she grew up and go thrown into the world and the messiness of it all.

3 Reyes Mago & Rosca de Reyes

Age: 20


Date of performance: 4/25/2025


Language: Spanish


Nationality: Mexican American


Occupation: Full-Time Student


Primary Language: English


Residence: California

Context:

My informant shared their experience with the celebration of “3 Reyes Magos,” or “Three Kings Day,” a tradition rooted in the biblical story of the Magi visiting the infant Jesus. Celebrated on January 6th during the Feast of the Epiphany, this holiday marks the end of the Christmas season. While the original story involves the kings bringing symbolic gifts such as gold, the modern tradition has adapted so that the Three Kings now bring presents to well-behaved children. Families typically wake up to find gifts left by the kings, much alike Christmas. One key tradition associated with the day that my informant shared, is the sharing of Rosca de Reyes aka, ‘The Kings Cake‘, a round, sweet bread with a hidden baby Jesus figurine inside. Finding this figure comes with the responsibility of hosting a future family party, a duty that applies even if the recipient is a child—placing the hosting obligation on the parent. This celebration blends religious meaning, family bonding, and festive customs that are passed down through generations.

Analysis:

Though distinctively different traditions, a similar meaning behind the Hispanic holiday is shared with my informant. I believe this holiday, shares a lot with the American traditions Christmas holds, so it acts like a second one for most. I’ve witnessed that sometimes it even hold more value than the traditional day of Christmas considering its the exact date that Jesus was supposedly born. I found it interesting how my informants background changed some of the traditions acted during this holiday and the meaning behind them. For example, as a Salvadorian, upon finding the hidden baby Jesus, the recipient makes tamales for the family. Making tamales is a heavy and arduous task that can take an entire day, which further amplifies the significance and value of this action and event.

Christmas present fakeout

Nationality: American
Age: 60
Occupation: Computer Security
Language: English

“The tradition was, we would have to go to the store to get batteries or milk or something and we were anticipating Santa coming. And we were like “oh no, we don’t want to miss Santa” because Santa gave presents the day before, on the 24th because we celebrated at home. And then Christmas day, we’d go to my dad’s parent’s house. Well, when we lived out that way. Or I guess now the way we do it is [informant’s family side] 24th and [informant’s spouse’s side] on the 25th. So we’re waiting for Santa Claus and then my mother would say “hey, we need batteries/milk/something”” so we’d all go out and when we came back Santa had visited and the tree was lit and presents were under the tree. As I grew up, it was me taking my siblings to the store. And so the story repeats.  

Context: “When I was little, for Christmas. At least since I was maybe four, until my siblings were in their teens.”

Informant does not tie this to national identity and wondered how their parents did it because informant didn’t believe in Santa.

“I don’t know if we did that with the relatives up north, I think it was just my family doing that. And I don’t remember my parents talking about doing it. I think we did it with the boys but I don’t know. And I don’t know if we’ll do it with the great granddaughter, once she’s cognizant. “

Analysis: This tradition acts as a way to prepare for a larger tradition, that of Santa bringing presents at Christmas. This variation places the gift giving earlier in the evening, not at midnight as some versions have or in the early morning, as it is imperative for a store to still be open. In order to preserve the magic of the gift giving, the magic of the evening is falsely broken. The parent says that they need to go to the store for something right away, leading the children to assume they have to stop the Christmas celebrations and will miss Santa. Of course, this serves as a decoy so that they can return to a magical Christmas-filled house and partake more fully in the festivities then. The idea of this ‘false exit’ is effective, and also allows the older children to keep participating past the age of their belief. They are able to become the one taking younger siblings to the store and therefore become a weaver of the magic themselves, taking a more active role and shifting their satisfaction towards continuing the tradition for younger children. This tradition can span several generations, as the informant mentions, and continuously invites improvisation and variation so that the children can be surprised and delighted by Santa’s visit.