Tag Archives: wedding

Story About a Priest at a Wedding Party

Nationality: Irish

Occupation: Horse Race Track Manager

Residence: Waterford, Ireland

Language: English

Text:

Back in the day Murphy got married, but he hardly remembers it because of how much he had to drink, oh far far too much. At one point during the ceremony the priest came over to him and said “Murphy you are drunk” and Murphy said “how do you know father?” and the priest said “Because you are lying on the floor”. Murphy looked up at the priest and said “that may be true, but the best man is drunker than me” and the priest says “don’t you mean ‘drunker than I’?” and Murphy says “no father, nobody is drunker than you”.

Context:

When my aunt told me this story, she acted like it happened at a wedding that she went to as a child growing up in Dublin; only when I pressed further did she admit it was a story she heard, not one she observed. It is unclear if there was a specific wedding that this actually happened at, but the story had been passed down from her mother, and her friends had heard similar stories elsewhere. When I pressed more, she said that one of her friends heard that story but said it happened in Kerry (in the West of Ireland), and if the story took place there that would feed into stereotypes Irish people have about Kerry.

Analysis:

The way that my aunt acted like this story had happened at a wedding she went to reveals a lot about Irish communities. The idea of a priest being drunk at a wedding is funny, but the story works as a joke because it isn’t completely unreasonable. In many parts of Ireland (less so in Dublin, which is how I knew the story wasn’t a true experience of hers), the priest is a major part of the town’s social network, where he would know everyone and be at any major event like a wedding. However, a priest would also be willing to join in the celebration, which opposes their day to day holy life. Many people in rural Ireland have experienced priests acting in a very normal way outside of their holy work, but this is generally not talked about; this joke is a way of bringing up how priests are human just like everyone else.

Sudani Tradition: On Weddings

Context:

G is a 20 years old Animation and Digital Arts major from Birmingham, UK. Members of his family immigrated to Birmingham from Sudan. He is a junior at USC and has been living in the area for 3 years.

Text:

Please excuse any grammar issues, these are direct text message quotes. 

G: “at a Sudani wedding the bride and the groom spit milk at each other that is presented by the matriarch of both families”

Interviewer: “by any chance do you know background on that?”

G: “for the life of me i can’t remember why but i do know that whoever spits first is the person who is supposedly ‘in charge in the relationship’ […] and it’s for like commitment to one another ”

Interpretation:

G’s anecdote references something we’ve discussed a number of times in class – wedding traditions. To me, the significance here draws clearly on a number of common themes in folklore. For one thing, milk is white – associated with purity like many things at a wedding. What’s more, its role in nature and the human life cycle associate it with health and growth. Sudan is patriarchal in its gender roles, so I feel that this meaning is emphasized by the fact that it is the matriarch (mother figure) of each family that gives the bride or groom the milk. This is an apparent reference again to life cycle and growing out of youth. Like G said, spitting it first shows commitment and authority, though the internet mentions prosperity as well. In general, it seems this tradition is one done for luck at a major life moment, a frequent folkloric concept.

Two Weddings

It is apparently common for Nigerian immigrants to the U.S. to have two weddings when they get married: one here in the States, either in American traditional style or in hybridized cultural fashion, and one back in Nigeria, following (often pre-colonial) traditions of their tribes. 

For example, the Nigerian (Igbo) immigrant parents of Chika, a Bay Area native, had a typical “white wedding” in the U.S., and another in Nigeria during which his mom and dad “walked through his [dad’s] neighborhood with everyone playing music and dancing on the way to the ceremony.”

This practice makes complete sense in the context of ceremonial rites of passage like weddings being ritualized and performed publicly in order for transitions and new identities to be communicated to and recognized by community members. Being that Nigerian immigrants often have at least two international communities, each with their own cultural norms and social categories, it can be affirming of new relationships developing on the intersection of both to have two weddings.

Injeolmi Tteok

“It’s somewhat of a tradition in Korea, I’m not sure if they do it anymore, but my mom told me when there’s a wedding, the bride and groom eat a certain kind of Tteok called Injeolmi, which is supposed to be extra sticky. They eat extra sticky Tteok so that the pair ends up sticking to each other, resembling a long and happy marriage.”

My informant learned about this tradition from his mom. He hasn’t witnessed it in person, but has only gone to one Korean wedding. It makes sense he said, since there is a saying of ‘you are what you eat’, hence if you eat something sticky, you might get stuck to your partner, which is a good thing.

I think this is a good example of a ritual. No one truly has control over how long the couple lasts, and by consuming this sticky tteok, it gives the couple control over their marriage. Tteok is also relatively cheap, allowing for this ritual to become common. Tteok is also traditionally very important in Korean culture, and by consuming it on an important day,

Blocking the Groom

Informant AM is a graduate student from San Jose California, whose family is originally from Ethiopia. There is a strong Ethiopian diasporic community in San Jose, where much of its traditions live on.

Text:

“The morning before the reception, the groom and his family members accompany him to go pick up the bride. But, at the door, the bride’s family is blocking them. They’re role playing — that’s what it seems like. I’m like, ‘Didn’t y’all agree to this?’ I don’t know why it became a tradition. Every single Ethiopian wedding I’ve been to has done it.”

Context:

Informant AM witnessed this tradition in primarily Ethiopian Orthodox Christian weddings. Ethiopia is a country with 36 million Orthodox Christians as of 2017, according to the Pew Research Center (Diamant). The Orthodox Christian religion places an emphasis on sexual purity in women, with the most apparent example being the veneration of the Virgin Mary, the virgin mother of Jesus Christ.

Analysis:

In “Wedding Ceremonies in European Folklore,” Hungarian folklorist Géza Róheim gives several examples of similar wedding traditions where the families of the bride and groom role-play a situation with a barrier, such as a Slovak wedding tradition where the groom’s family attempts to stela the bride’s bed. Róheim proposes that this cluster of traditions, collectively termed, “The Barrier,” are a means of giving meaning to the liminal nature of a wedding, especially in the case of the woman transitioning into sexual maturity. The custom of blocking the groom similarly reflects the importance of sexual maturity, especially to Orthodox Christians.

Works Cited:

Róheim, Géza. “Wedding Ceremonies in European Folklore.” International Folkloristics Classic Contributions by the Founders of Folklore, Rowman & Littlefield, 1999, pp. 197–230.

Diamant, Jeff. “Ethiopia Is an Outlier in the Orthodox Christian World.” Pew Research Center, Pew Research Center, 17 Aug. 2020, https://www.pewresearch.org/short-reads/2017/11/28/ethiopia-is-an-outlier-in-the-orthodox-christian-world/#:~:text=Ethiopia%20is%20an%20outlier%20in%20the%20Orthodox%20Christian%20world&text=The%20country%20in%20the%20Horn,largest%20Orthodox%20population%20after%20Russia.