“Thôi nôi”: Vietnamese 1st Birthday Celebration

Nationality: Vietnamese-American
Age: 49
Occupation: Nail Technician
Residence: Iowa
Performance Date: 5/1/2021
Primary Language: Vietnamese
Language: English

Main Piece:

A: It’s like a birthday. Your friends, family [are invited], cook food, give you something like– like baby clothes, toys… but it’s different like, I have to do a tray. I put on scissors… hammer… mirror… cái này là gì– chỉ, everything like on the tray. Then let the baby pick. The first thing the baby picks up, we think, “Oh, in the future, she will do thợ may, thợ cắt tóc, một cái người designer, hay là bác xĩ, này kia đó. 

  • “ It’s like a birthday. Your friends, family [are invited], cook food, give you something like– like baby clothes, toys… but it’s different like, I have to do a tray. I put on scissors… hammer… mirror… what is this– just, everything like on the tray. Then let the baby pick. The first thing the baby picks up, we think, “Oh, in the future, she will be a seamstress, a hairdresser, a designer, or a doctor, this and that.

Me: So what kinds of things are on the tray? You said scissors, thread…

A: Everything you can think of…. But, don’t put anything like– not lucky. 

Me: Did you do this celebration for anyone?

A: You. 

(Dad interjects: You did?

A: Yeah!

D: What did she pick?

A: Nó bóc cái gương với là cái micro. Chac là [our son] không có làm.

  • “She picked up the mirror and a microphone. I don’t think we did one for [our son].”

D: That’s why he’s not going anywhere [we all laugh])

Background:

My mother is the one telling me this story. This is a traditional way of celebrating the baby’s first birthday in Vietnam. Thus my mother, who was born and raised in Vietnam until immigrating to the United States in the 1990s, became familiar with this practice while she was there. She likes this celebration because of the fun of predicting what the baby’s future career will be, however, she does not fully believe in it. She explains to me that when she was younger, before she had me, she believed that these predictions would come true, but now, it is simply a fun activity. 

Context:

This is a transcript of our live conversation. We were in the process of eating dinner when I asked my mom if birthdays are celebrated in Vietnam. She responded no. Instead, certain milestones of a baby’s life are celebrated. She explains the baby’s 1st birthday after explaining how guarded the baby’s first month of life is.

Thoughts:

I had known other cultures in Asia had this celebration of a baby’s first large milestone, such as Korea’s 100-day birthday, where they practice homeopathic magic to predict the baby’s future career, but I did not know that there was something similar in Vietnamese culture. To further explain how this is homeopathic magic, the act of the baby choosing symbols of a career mimics the career the child will have in the future. This is the first time I learned about this celebration. After my parents’ generation immigrated to the United States, I was never old enough to recognize if my cousins’ first birthdays were celebrated in this traditional Vietnamese practice. When one of my cousins had children, at that point, our family celebrated birthdays in the American way, as my mother explained that birthdays aren’t celebrated in Vietnamese culture aside from a baby’s first milestones. Such is a common occurrence in folk practices pertaining to the life cycle, where a baby’s life is more unpredictable in the beginning stages, and thus is celebrated when they pass markers that indicate better chances of survival. Though my mother said she doesn’t believe in the prediction, it is interesting that you could make a case that my selection was pretty accurate (I am a theatre major). 

“Đây Tháng”: Vietnamese Folk Belief on a Baby’s 1st Month

Nationality: Vietnamese-American
Age: 49
Occupation: Nail Technician
Residence: Iowa
Performance Date: 5/1/2021
Primary Language: Vietnamese
Language: English

Main Piece:

A: Baby sinh ra là không có gì– một ngày hai ngày–roi tới một tháng là– giống như là ở Việt Nam, đẻ sinh xong là không được đi đâu hết. Rồi stay inside the house. Until one month. That’s why the mothers– when the baby is one month, it’s like, “oh, he can go out everywhere now.” You know? Like a 21 year-old. Everyone can hold you [when you are one month old].

  • “When the baby is born, there isn’t– by one day then two days– then when it reaches one month– it’s like in Vietnam, when you’re done giving birth you can’t go anywhere. You stay inside the house. Until one month. That’s why the mothers– when the baby is one month, it’s like, “oh, he can go out everywhere now.” You know? Like a 21-year-old. Everyone can hold you [when you are one month old].”

Me: Why do you think people do that?

A: Because, giống như con chưa có được 1 tháng, còn con nhỏ. Nhiều khi người ta hay người kia ôm, người ta binh, rồi, uh, này kia. Dài tháng là– một tháng là– trong một tháng đó là không có ai dừng tới, thăm, hết cả mẹ–  mom and baby– là chỉ inside thôi– inside the house.

  • “Because, it’s like you’re not one month yet, you’re still too young. Often one person or the other person holds you, and they’re sick, and, uh, this and that. Reaching one month is– one month is– in that one month no one can touch the baby, visit, both mother– mom and baby– they can only be inside– inside the house.”

Me: What would happen if someone visited the baby?

A: Some people worry that– if they go to visit you– then they go home and something [bad] happens, then that’s not lucky… And it’s the same for me– I don’t want you to visit me and my baby– if you go home and do something bad, then some bad like the baby’s sick can happen.

Background:

My mother is the one telling me this story. She was born and raised in Vietnam until immigrating to the United States in the 1990s. Being the oldest of three other children, she became familiar with this folk practice when her siblings were born. She explains to me that when she gave birth to me, she held the same beliefs, and thus did not want anyone to visit her or me at least for a month after I was born. My mother tends to take superstitions about luck seriously and accordingly felt strongly about protecting the luck and life of a growing baby.

Context:

This is a transcript of our live conversation. We were in the process of eating dinner when I asked my mom if birthdays are celebrated in Vietnam. She responded no. Instead, certain milestones of a baby’s life are celebrated.

Thoughts:

This is the first I’ve heard of this Vietnamese folk belief. I realize I cannot remember if other members of my extended family also share this belief and practice, as none of my relatives had children around a time I was old enough to notice or understand. However, considering my mothers’ age when her siblings were born, the state of Vietnam was in the midst of war, and afterward, was in the process of rebuilding the country. As my mothers’ and most other Vietnamese families faced food insecurity and lack of access to health services, protecting a baby’s life when it is most vulnerable is an understandable practice. In folk practices pertaining to the life cycle, this particular practice illustrates how a baby does not achieve “personhood” until one month when the baby’s life is more secure. Furthermore, this belief is wrapped in contagious magic. My mother explains this in how it is believed that if a visitor commits bad or unlucky behavior after seeing the baby before one month, then that bad luck will be brought upon the mother and baby, who came in contact with the visitor.

“Cạo Gió”: Vietnamese Cold Remedy

Nationality: Vietnamese-American
Age: 49
Occupation: Nail Technician
Residence: Iowa
Performance Date: 5/2/2021
Primary Language: Vietnamese
Language: English

Main Piece:

A: Cạo gió là hồi xưa ở Quê, không có biết là– đi bác sĩ, chừng nào nguời ta bị cảm, hay là bị bịnh chút chút… mệt mỏi, chừng thay nhức mỏi, thì lúc đó cạo gió, ngời ta feel better. Nguời ta cảm thấy khỏe lên, đỡ lên. Giống như cào gió cho cái chất dộc ra ngaòi. Cái hơi dộc trong mình nó ra ngaòi. 

  • “Cạo gió” = traditional Vietnamese practice of bruising the skin with some sort of round or hard object by scraping it on the body with medium pressure.
  • “Cạo gió is back then at Quê (city in southern Vietnam), we didn’t know– when someone goes to the doctor, when they have a cold, or when they’re a little sick… tired and sore, when your body is sore and aching, then that’s when you do cạo gió, the person will feel better. People experience that they get better, feel better. It’s like you do cạo gió to remove the harmful properties out of your body. The harmful elements in your body go out.”

Me: How do you do cạo gió?

A: Just xức dầu lên, dầu nóng lên, xong rồi dùng cái penny, cào nó tôi.

  • “Just apply menthol oil on your body, warm menthol oil, then get a penny, and just scrape it.”

Me: Do you have to do a specific shape?

A: (emphatically) Yeah. (gesturing) cào hai đường thẩng xuống, rồi hai bên– cào lên hai bên hông. Xong. Rồi xủc dầu lên. 

  • “Yeah. scrape two vertical lanes down the spine, then on two sides– scrape either side of the lanes. Done. Then apply more menthol oil.”

Background:

My mother is the one telling me this story. She first learned about this practice through her great-grandmother, who performed this on her father and her uncles when they were sick, back when she was a child in Vietnam. Since then, she has performed this on my sibling and me, as well as my father. She believes this to work, and also scrapes her shoulders when they feel sore.

Context:

This is a transcript of our live conversation. My mother was in the process of making dinner (which was phở: Vietnamese rice noodle dish in beef broth) when I asked her about this practice. It has been on my mind since the first day of the lecture when we discussed folk methods of curing colds.

Thoughts:

This practice of scraping the back with menthol oil and a penny is something my mother has done for my sibling and me, and my father whenever we were sick. She mostly did this when my sibling and I were much younger, and I remember not understanding then, what the purpose of this practice was or how it helped. Now, it could be related to a more mainstream practice of cupping, which involves the same method of bruising the body to remove toxins. While this technique is folk medicine and folk practice, it can also be thought of as homeopathic magic. My mother specifically describes how the paths being scraped into the body mimic the body’s toxins’ passageway out of the body.

Owl: Sign of Bad Luck

Nationality: Vietnamese-American
Age: 49
Occupation: Nail Technician
Residence: Iowa
Performance Date: 5/2/2021
Primary Language: Vietnamese
Language: English

Main Piece:

A: Bà cố nói là cái con đô không đem lại lucky. I don’t know the whole story, but bà cố said if they go on your house, you will have bad luck everything.

  • “My great-grandma said that owls don’t bring luck. I don’t know the whole story, but she said if they go on your house, you will have bad luck everything.”

Me: Everything?

A: Yeah like money, family… will not be happy. 

Me: When did she first tell you that?

A: Mommy thấy ở chên cái nóc nhà hồi xưa. 

  • “When I saw it on top of the roof back then.”

Me: Then she told you that?

A: Yeah.

Me: What do you do then? After you see one?

A: Đuổi nó đi. And pray that nothing bad will happen.

  • “Shoo it away. And pray that nothing bad will happen.”

Me: Have you ever seen anything happen? Bad luck after seeing an owl?

A: Yeah I saw it. Cái chuyện đó không biết là đúng hay không, mà bà cố bị bịnh, bà cố– like 

great-grandma– bà cố của mommy–  bà bị bịnh. Xong rồi when con chim, nó tới, đậu trên nóc nhà nó kêu, rồi sau đó là bà cố chết. 

  • “Yeah I saw it. I don’t know if this story is right or not, but my great-grandma was sick, she– like great-grandma– my great-grandma– she was sick. Then when the owl, it came, perched on the roof and hooted, then after that my great-grandma died.”

Me: How soon?

A: Not long after.

Background:

My mother is the one telling me this story. The day before, an owl was perched on a tree in our backyard while she was away at work. My dad was the one to see the owl and gathered my sibling and me outside to look at it, hoot back at it, and take pictures of it. He then told us not to tell my mom, who believes the owl is a sign of bad luck. In Vietnamese culture, seeing or hearing an owl is believed to be an omen that death is coming. My mother worries that this superstition is true, as she feels her great-grandmother’s death was connected to the sighting of the owl in some way. She warned me to shoo the owl away if I see it again.

Context:

This is a transcript of our live conversation. My mother was in the process of making dinner (which was phở: Vietnamese rice noodle dish in beef broth) when I asked her about this story, being reminded of our visit from the owl the day before. 

Thoughts:

This was the first time I’d heard from either of my parents that an owl was a sign of bad luck, or that it is an omen of death. My mother is the person in our family with the most knowledge of superstitions, and the one who holds the most belief in them. Folk belief is contextual, not all-or-nothing, and not stagnant, thus, if my mother never had the personal experience of an owl visit being close to her great-grandmother’s death, she may not believe in this sign as much. Such is the case for my father, who rarely believes in superstitions. Thus, when he told us about the owl, he wasn’t fearful, and encouraged playful behavior when teasing the owl. However, the tone changed slightly when he shared an anecdote that he also saw a connection between an owl’s visit and the death of one of his neighbors when he lived in Vietnam. Being a paranoid person, a part of me is a bit fearful of the potential veracity of this story. However, I was reminded of how I’d heard this owl’s coo many times before knowing about the superstitions around owl visits, and nothing of bad luck had occurred then, influencing my belief in this superstition.

Break your Mom’s Back

Nationality: Vietnamese-American
Age: 10
Occupation: Elementary School Student
Residence: Iowa
Performance Date: 5/1/2021
Primary Language: English

Main Piece:

B: People would say, “if you step on that crack then you’ll break your mom’s back.” 

Me: Who did you learn that from?

B: A classmate. One time we were walking out to recess and there’s like a crack in the concrete. And so he told me (laughing) that if you step on that crack then you’ll break your mom’s back. And then I just stepped on the crack (laughs). And then I was like- “are you sure about that,” (laughs). 

Me: You did it on purpose?

B: Yeah because I didn’t believe them, cause it was fake. So then I was like “what are you gonna do about it” (laughing). 

Me: Did other kids believe it?

B: No.

Background: 

My informant is my cousin’s 10-year-old son, who is in the fourth grade. He lives in a suburban neighborhood near Des Moines, which is the capital of Iowa. He goes to a public elementary school in his district, where he first heard this superstition in first grade. He finds this superstition silly as if it could never be believable. He laughs often in this telling, showing that this superstition is rather a funny story to him.

Context:

This is a transcript of our conversation over the phone. Lately, he has been telling me stories about what goes on during school, though this conversation was prompted specifically for this collection project. He brought this up on his own.

Thoughts:

This superstition was something that I also heard in elementary school. I similarly went to a public school, not too far away from his in the capital (Des Moines). When I was told this, it was also in a playful manner as his re-telling of the superstition suggests. It’s interesting that children find humor in a superstition that sounds rather brutal; a situation where you could be the cause of a potentially debilitating and painful injury to your mother. This act of poking fun at a brutal hypothetical then points to how children often find humor in being anti-hegemonic, where the mother in the situation is the authoritative figure in a child’s life. How a child reacts and perceives this superstition, whether it be humorous like my informant, or fearful, can speak to how a child views the authority of their parent.