Tag Archives: women

“A moment on the lips, a lifetime on the hips”

Nationality: USA
Age: 19
Occupation: Student At USC
Residence: Thousand Oaks
Performance Date: 2/16/2023
Primary Language: English

Background: The informant is a current USC student. She heard about this proverb from her grandma. She used this proverb as a reminder to stay away from snacks.

Informant: my grandma, she was from San Diego, and she always used to say, “A moment on the lips, a life time on the hips.” Because…like…I don’t know… she was just always like…… She’s from the 50s so the era where everybody was trying to be real skinny or what not and so she said this all the time about like… snacking. I guess it goes to show just sort of how like a lot of Californian’s having this obsession of being “healthy” in a way… Like trying to fit in this certain west coast beauty standard.

Analysis: I think this proverb contains both characteristics of an era and mindset amongst women (or the social expectation that is held against them). Interestingly, we can observe the change in beauty standards through this proverb. Since people prefer fuller hips nowadays, the warning part of the proverb seems to be more encouraging than deterring.


Don’t be Born on Eclipses

Background: The informant is a 50 year old man. He was born in Tecate, Mexico, moving to California when he was young. He grew up with his four siblings and two parents, moving from location to location across California. He currently lives in Los Angeles, California. 

Context: The context was when watching an astronomy show together on a streaming platform. They made a mention of an eclipse.

Text:

UI: Now, one superstition that I grew up with, that I was very well aware of and it’s going to sound completely strange, is that pregnant women should not go outside when there’s an eclipse. If a pregnant woman is outside during the time of an eclipse like that somehow or other, because of the eclipse, that the baby will be born deformed. Now, the thing with the eclipse is that, in actual fact, I don’t really know how it works. I don’t know if it’s because, you know, maybe the rays of the sun get distorted or, you know, I mean look in aztec culture they would look at it [eclipses] when they occurred. During the times of the Aztecs it was sort of like,  the moon is fighting with the sun and and the sun is overcoming the moon, It’s just something I’ve always remembered as a kid.

Me: Who did you hear it from?

UI: I had heard it from my mom. I had heard it from friends.

Me: What about when your wife was pregnant?

UI: There was an eclipse, and after explaining it to her, she understood and stayed inside.

Analysis:

Informant: The informant understands that the superstition may be considered strange by many people, self-aware that the superstition may not be well spread throughout his family. However, it is clear that the informant still believes in superstition to a strong degree.

Mine: The superstition was something new to me. It reveals a few things about Mexican culture. The first is the protective nature over pregnant women and the baby they are carrying. Since women are treated very delicately by this superstition, it would be interesting to see how it compares with other Mexican folkloric ideas. Second, not wanting the women to be exposed during an eclipse so that the baby will not be deformed shows a societal, not just Mexican, belief against children who are not born healthy. It has some negative connotations that a baby with defects is not wanted. However, that is a more modern interpretation of the superstition, and placing it into a past time period, many women used to die during childhood or their children would die when extremely young. Anything would want to be done to protect the child and the mother. If a baby does have deformities, it could ned up hurting the mother or the child might not live for long, which was extremely concerning.

Burmese Protective Women

Nationality: Burmese
Age: 21
Occupation: Student
Residence: Myanmar
Performance Date: November 2, 2021
Primary Language: English
Language: Burmese

Background: The informant is a student studying in the United States but originally from Myanmar. He did not personally experience the encounter but heard about it from his mother who he trusts greatly. 

Me: Where did you hear the story you’re about to tell? 

KZ: This is from my mom‘s perspective;I heard it from her first. 

Me: Tell me about the encounter. 

KZ: When my mom was in high school, well, I need to tell you more context of everything for it to make sense. So my grandma was a high school teacher and she lived with my mom, my aunt and four siblings. They lived in the city but my grandfather is a cop, or he’s a detective, so he gets assigned random cases around the country so he would do six months in random places. My grandfather was in this town out in the middle of nowhere and then my mom had summer break so he was told well you’re a girl and you’re free so you shouldn’t be here. You should be a volunteer tutoring for summer school so my mom went to his village and it was just my grandfather in this metal Lakehouse. My mom was often alone there and he would be away most of the time. So one day she came home and its traditional houses so with really long legs elevated so it doesn’t get flooded and then there’s like a staircase at the back, right, so my mom was minding her own business, it was like 4pm, and she was cycling back home and she saw a woman with traditional clothes walk up the stairs in the back. So my mom was like oh shit there’s a thief, because my mom is like no bullshit, and she’s like I’m gonna catch this thief. She ran inside and went into all the rooms but she was gone. She didn’t see her come out so she thought the thief had just left.

Me: And I am assuming it wasn’t just a thief? 

KZ: Yeah this was her first encounter she remembers with the ghost thing or whatever. 

Me: When was the next time she remembers encountering the woman? 

KZ: Well, she often had to spend some nights alone because my grandfather had to do shit for his job. Often at night she would be in bed and she would always hear someone walking outside her balcony but thought it was something like water dripping on it. Whatever, my mom was like wow this is annoying and always got up to make sure there’s like no one outside. My moms like OK whatever I don’t have time for this but then it would keep happening so my mom got really pissed. She’s like well if you’re a spirit than fuck you cause I need to work tomorrow and like I don’t have time for this bitch. So she’s like whatever but then her siblings come for a vacation or for like three days and then they also experience the same shit. Like someone was just trying to bother them for no reason. Then my uncle, he gets super annoyed easily right, he would take a nap and someone would poke him. He asked my mother, why are you bothering me but it wasn’t her. So then one time he just pretended to be asleep and when someone poked him, like this, he grabbed it and then he just saw a hairy hand. He was like WHAT THE FUCK. At this point they realized that something was going on. So there’s a storage room and my uncle went in there and then he pulled out his dick and he pissed. He was like fuck you, if you’re a spirit living here then I you can only get my dick! He’s like fuck you don’t fuck with me again. 

Me: Haha I don’t know if that was a smart move. Do you know what this thing was? 

KZ: Yeah, there were other times at night when my grandfather was away and my grandma got haunted. She was in bed with my mom and my aunt and there was someone that kept walking on the roof. My grandma started cussing and then someone dropped something huge, so the whole house just shook. She was then like oh shit what the fuck, are we being attacked by some random people. Also my grandfather found a pink heart, and they are kind of freaked out by now. My grandfather was like “yeah I didn’t tell you guys but there are these different types of spirits in our culture. There are these female spirits whose job is basically to protect certain people and certain places.” They’re just the maintenance workers. He was like yeah there’s two of them who have been very protective of this house and protective of me. So, it turns out they really like my grandfather, they’re possessive of him, so they were really annoyed when my mom came because she’s another girl and when my grandmother came because she’s, you know, another woman that’s in my grandfather’s life. My grandfather was pretty attractive I guess. 

Me: Did they ever go away or anything? Or did the encounters just continue? 

KZ: Well he had promised them that he would bring them back to the main city one day because there is a pagoda in my city, it’s like one of the biggest monuments in the world. He basically promised them that when he goes into the city he would bring them to the pagoda so that they can do some good deeds and they can escape because they wanna move on. He then went to the pagoda and was like do whatever you want now, you’re free to go. After that all of that stuff ended, because all they wanted was to protect my grandfather. They wanted to escape this so when he finally just left them alone like nothing really happened after that. 

Me: What do you think it was?

KZ: I don’t really know. Like I believe that my mother experienced it, but I don’t know how to explain it or like what it actually is. 

The story was told to me in person while sitting next to the informant. 

My Thoughts: It is an interesting situation where the information himself did not experience it, but his mother did, and because he trusts his mother so much he believes this story as much as if he had experienced it.  Personally I think that this story is very interesting and I find myself believing that the experiences were real, although, like the informant, I am sceptical of the explanation for the events. 

Gendered Dining Customs In India

Nationality: Indian
Age: 25
Occupation: Recent Graduate (Master's)
Residence: Los Angeles
Performance Date: 5/2/2021
Primary Language: English
Language: Telugu, Hindi

Informant’s Background:

My informant, SV, is a recent graduate with a Master’s from the University of Southern California. He is 25, was born in Hyderabad, Telangana, India, and moved to the United States to attend a graduate program at USC. Post-graduation he remains in Los Angeles hunting for a job.

Context:

My informant, SV, is my roommate and a close friend of mine. I asked him if he could share some Indian traditions, customs, or folklore with me.

Performance:

SV: “So… There’s an Indian tradition where during uh festival or if like, if you’re inviting guests over, like at a gathering the… women are expected to, uhm, when people are having to eat, the women are expected to be the ones to serve, and the men and children are expected to eat first. The women are not allowed to eat until the men and children finish eating. Only once the men and children finish eating, they usually eat, and sometimes they may not even eat at like, the table, they may just eat in like the kitchen. So… this is kind of like, mmm, sort of a general kind of important sort of hierarchy and level of importance that’s sort of present that even when you’re like visiting a house, or like you’re invited to a person’s place as a guest you’re sort of expected to greet people based on their age, that’s one of the criteria, like the older they are the more important they’re are as people and you’re to prioritize them. And also the men are more important than the women, so it’s like you greet the oldest man first and then go down to the youngest man, and then you go down to the women if you’re greeting someone.”

Informant’s Thoughts:

SV: “That’s uhm, kind of a very… I guess sexist way of thinking. Which… was quite prevalent like in older times, where I think more urban and more modern a setting this is less and less common. And for the younger generations, it’s getting close to being more and more equal for men and women, and there’s no kind of like, oh women have to serve and the men just have to chill and wait to get served. Like my grandad, cause he’s quite old, and he follows these traditions a little more like strictly, like even though me and my sis would both be in the room, he kind of rather expected like my sister to be the one to serve and I didn’t have to do anything, and I used to find that odd. I was like “what’s the difference?” Like they’re our guests, and we can both like, serve if we have to serve them. So that’s my kind of-my personal experience with that. “

Thoughts:

Separation of women and men is common in many cultures, especially historically, but the ways in which these gender groups are divided are changing as we move into the modern world. The rate at which these changes occur of course differs from culture to culture, in this case this is a tradition that would most likely be seen as near appalling by Western audiences, yet in India it is still being gradually phased out more recently, but was still by the sounds of it surprisingly common up until not that long ago. The health consequences should also be considered alongside the social ones in this case, as this tradition has to do with the consumption of food. Waiting until after the men are finished eating could easily lead to the women only ending up with scraps of the original dinner, leading to malnutrition, both in themselves and potentially in any babies that they might give birth to. So not only is this tradition without a doubt considered sexist by today’s standards, as SV noted in the interview, but it also could easily lead to negative health effects as well.

Peels for The Initials of Your Spouse

Nationality: American, Ancestral: Scottish and Germanic
Age: 20
Occupation: Student
Residence: Scotland
Performance Date: 04/27/2021
Primary Language: English
Language: Chinese

Main Content:

M: Me, I: Informant

I:OOOoooo, I don’t know if you want this but there’s a lot of um you know like when you are peeling potatoes, you throw the peel on the floor and it’ll name the initials of who you are going to marry

M: I did not know that

I: There’s a lot of them. That was a thing,  ugh again my grandma, I swear she is a crazy *laughs*. Or or apples if you are peeling anything, you do it in one peel as far as you can get, and if it breaks apart that’s just more letters for you and then you throw it on the floor and it’ll—-

M: Cool, cool!

Context: She learned this growing up cooking with her grandma, who is old fashioned. This was a practice she really enjoyed even if the answer changed from time to time but was also a bit nerve racking. The context brings an added element here as this practice is done in the kitchen, traditionally a place that is deemed for women. Thus this practice is much more used amongst the women.

Analysis: This practice definitely is more geared towards women as I said in the context piece because of where it takes place, but if we dig deeper and see how it reflects the portrayal of women and how while they cook in the kitchen, they wish for their future husbands; it comes across to directly chain domesticity to females and further pushes the age old view that a woman wants to get married and looks forward to finding herself a spouse. Through this way, the older and wiser women encourage the younger and more naive girls to be excited for their domesticity. Especially because of the prevalence of fruits in this practice, which in folklore tends to represent the fertility and virginity of a woman, which is often linked to their marriage.