Two Weddings

It is apparently common for Nigerian immigrants to the U.S. to have two weddings when they get married: one here in the States, either in American traditional style or in hybridized cultural fashion, and one back in Nigeria, following (often pre-colonial) traditions of their tribes. 

For example, the Nigerian (Igbo) immigrant parents of Chika, a Bay Area native, had a typical “white wedding” in the U.S., and another in Nigeria during which his mom and dad “walked through his [dad’s] neighborhood with everyone playing music and dancing on the way to the ceremony.”

This practice makes complete sense in the context of ceremonial rites of passage like weddings being ritualized and performed publicly in order for transitions and new identities to be communicated to and recognized by community members. Being that Nigerian immigrants often have at least two international communities, each with their own cultural norms and social categories, it can be affirming of new relationships developing on the intersection of both to have two weddings.

“Bread and Butter” (Splitting the Pole)

• saying/banisher of bad luck

Many people subscribe to the superstition that “splitting the pole,” or in other words, walking on two different sides of a (usually tall and inanimate) object, i.e. a pole, is bad luck–sometimes promising a split in the pair’s relationship, poor fortune, or even death for one or both parties, according to different beliefs. 

Of course, for various reasons, sometimes it is impossible for two people to avoid splitting the pole, in which case one of them must say “bread and butter” to undo the bad luck. This is presumably tied to the idea that splitting the pole will cause the two to separate in some way, and butter can’t really be separated from bread once spread. 

While there is limited written documentation/proof, because the superstition around splitting the pole seems to have originated among Black Americans, many point to the context of slavery, the life-or-death need for enslaved people to stay together and seek protection in numbers, and the ever-present threat of external parties dividing them from loved ones. 

However, “bread and butter” makes even physical separation powerless, restoring the protective powers of community, especially in travel. 

White Sage Smudging – Shelby S

• (co-opted) Indigenous American practice

Whenever Shelby moves into a new place, permanently or just for a short period of time, as well as after an occurrence thats makes her feel her space has been “dirtied” with negative events or emotions, she “smudges” by burning white sage with the window(s) and door(s) open to “release” the negativity.

This is a ritual among Indigenous Americans on the West Coast, where Shelby grew up (she is Black), which is performed to remove harmful spirits, forces, and “energy” from a structure, place, or person. As she’s gotten older, learned about the endangerment of white sage due to the spirituality industry’s overharvesting, as well as the general problems with appropriating Native American religious traditions, Shelby put effort into developing a sustainable and thoughtful relationship with white sage smudging and other practices only known to her because of the Indian-mania of American culture during the mid-late 20th century in which she was raised. 

She also burns other leaves and barks, such as cedar, that are used for smudging in places like West Africa. She says various affirmations, sometimes out loud and sometimes in her head, that call in protective spirits and forces while expelling harmful ones. The change in smell alone makes the space/person/object feel anew, and bugs tend to not be fans of aromatic smoke, illuminating potential origins of the belief in the “cleansing” powers of white sage, and smudging in general. 

Big Bear Ritual

Informant: N.N

Nationality: American

Primary Language: English

Other Language(s): N/A

Age: 19

Occupation: Student

Residence: Burbank, CA

Performance Date: 04/26/2024

N.N is 19 years old and is from Burbank, CA. I am close friends with his brother, so N.N is an acquaintance of mine. I asked him if there are any festivals or rituals he participates in regularly. He tells me about the yearly ritual his family does, in celebration of Christmas and December Break. 

“Every December, once school’s out, my family heads up to Big Bear and we stay there for like a week. We started this whole thing about four years ago when my uncle, who’s pretty much obsessed with snowboarding, thought it’d be a great idea for us to get together and hit the slopes. So, my mom would rent an Airbnb, and we’d spend our winter break snowboarding as much as we can. It’s pretty fun. My cousins E. and M. were just getting old enough to enjoy the trip, so my uncle figured it was the perfect time to start. I interpret this yearly celebration as a way for our family to just enjoy winter break and Christmas together in a way that’s unique to us. I really like it and I hope we keep doing this for a long time.”

Their December snowboarding trip also coincides with the Christmas season, which I think adds value to the family bonding experience. Since I know them personally, I know that they are a family that is super active and always into sports so this was probably a creative way to incorporate their hobby into a celebration. For them, Christmas is a time that’s associated with family and togetherness. Even though they aren’t Christian, they celebrate Christmas as a way to get closer and show appreciation for one another. I think that by integrating their holiday celebrations with this active tradition, it allows them to have core memories and stronger relationships since they have a shared experience. Their tendency to make it a tradition also shows how they have celebrated many traditions / rituals before that is personalized to their interests.

Tomb Sweeping Festival

Informant: N.N

Nationality: American

Primary Language: English

Other Language(s): N/A

Age: 19

Occupation: Student

Residence: Burbank, CA

Performance Date: 04/26/2024

N.N is 19 years old and is from Burbank, CA. I am close friends with his brother, so N.N is an acquaintance of mine.  I asked him if there are any festivals or rituals he participates in regularly. He tells me about the Tomb Sweeping Festival that his family participates in every year as well as the funeral customs they do during the festival. 

“Every spring break, around March or April, my family and I go to Thailand to celebrate the Tomb Sweeping Festival. It’s a tradition that’s been part of our family since I was thirteen. During the festival, we visit the altars of my great grandparents and clean them meticulously. It’s not just about tidying up; it’s a whole ritual. We bring offerings for my ancestors—my grandma’s parents. These offerings usually include their favorite foods and flowers. One of the most vivid parts of the festival is when we light firecrackers and sparklers on their altars. We then pray in Thai because our ancestors, grandma and mom used to live in Thailand. My mom and grandma always remind us, “If they weren’t alive, you wouldn’t be here”. I think they say this to instill a sense of respect and gratitude towards our ancestors. To them, and now to me, it’s important that we acknowledge and remember where we came from. Honestly, I think it’s a beautiful way to remember and pay respects to those who have passed away.”

Their Tomb Sweeping Festival reflects deep cultural values of respect, remembrance, and family ties. It emphasizes the importance of honoring one’s ancestors and acknowledging their contributions to our current lives. This ritual also shows the value of continuity and connection across generations, which reminds us of our heritage and the cycle of life. It’s a way for them to bond over shared history and instill a sense of gratitude for the past even in younger generations. The festival also embodies Chinese cultural values such as filial piety, showing their cultural roots.