Tag Archives: funeral rituals

Death Anniversaries

AGE

45

Date of performance

4/30/25

Language

English

Nationality

American

Occupation

Teacher’s Aid

Primary Language

Arabic

Residence

San Diego, CA

Ritual: Funerals, 40 days post death, and the 1-year anniversary

Context + Text: The individual is my mother, and she in an American immigrant from Iraq. I have learned many rituals following the death of people form my community, but the most interesting one’s stem from my mom. According to her, when an individual has passed away, if you are close to them, you are not allowed to leave the house for “happy” things for 40 days. Also, during those days, you should be wearing all black every day. “It’s for sure an interesting ritual we all follow, and it’s even different if you are super close to the individual, as the time period rises to one year instead of just 40 days”. On the 40th day since the death, the same individuals who were there for the funeral gather again to remember them, having a second funeral essentially. For family members, there is then another remembrance on the 1-year anniversary. (It is important to note that one year equals 11 months in this culture for historic reasons). “So, for me my father-in-law had passed away, and I did not attend any celebrations for one year and only wore black, I had to buy so many new clothes”, she continued. While it may be a little over the top, she believes that the new generation will slowly let these rituals die out as they are too much.

Analysis: The revering of the dead has been a tradition for centuries, stemming back to ancient civilizations, especially in the middle east. The individual and her family come from a long line of Iraqis who have held onto these ancient traditions revolving around the dead. Various religions and cultures have adopted similar rituals, as they believe that the one-year anniversary marks a significant period of time to mourn the individual. However, the rituals have subjective ‘guidelines’ as in who must participate in the one-year mourning. This creates all sorts of issues within small communities as they believe that some individuals should be mourning longer or not mourning at all, judging their closeness to the dead person. If an individual is seen celebrating or partying a little too early following the individual’s death, it can be considered disrespect by the family members, and has led to divisions between families and friends.  

Folk Ritual: Funeral Custom – Saranta

  1. Text: It is custom in the culture of Greek people to practice an extended window of mourning after a loved one dies. This window lasts 40 days and is called Saranta. It is the belief of the Greek people that during this window of time, the soul continues to stay within the earth and navigate within it. It has not passed on to heaven, but remains wandering for a period of time in order to complete and review lingering tasks from its time in life. This concept has been colloquially believed in by Greek people for centuries. It is at the basis of their concept of mourning, becoming something almost as equally important as the very funeral service itself. By participating in a continued mourning during this time, the family becomes adjacent to the spirit of their loved one as it exists around them.
  2. Informants Context: The Saranta is very important in our culture. For 40 days after the death, we continue to mourn. This is because we believe that the spirit continues to walk the earth for 40 days after passing. After my husbands death, I wore black for 40 days. This was to recognize and signal my own mourning. For the first three days after the death, they say the spirit remains near where they lived. I believe this – I felt him around the house, I heard him around where his bed was. After that, its said that they begin to explore the world, go back to places where they used to spend lots of time. Maybe he went back to Greece for a few days, I don’t know. But then in the final few weeks, he has to be with God, or so they say. Then on the 40th day, he gets to be free. He goes to heaven. We do little things in that time so to watch over him as he wanders. Mirrors are covered during the 40 days, my grandmother used to say that souls get trapped in the glass if they go into it. During the funeral, we make sure a small window is open in case his spirit wants to leave, to wander. Other little things are part of the 40 days. For example, very little cleaning and no renovation to the house after the death so not to disturb the soul if it wants to visit. The most important thing is that we light the Kantili (oil lamp) everyday to assure that he is guided back to us when he wants to visit. If the candle burns, it will also in part assure that his spirit will be eternal. These rituals were passed down to us by our families when we used to still live in Greece. They showed us how to practice these things when there were deaths in the community. I was there during the second world war when I was very young, and then during the civil war. So even though I left at an early age, we attended many funerals before I officially departed from the country.
  3. Collectors Interpretation: Both the 40 day period and the superstitious rituals that occur during this period reflect certain distinct values on the part of the Greeks. Firstly, these superstitions clearly reflect a value for the concept of the eternal. Specifically as it applies to the burning light, Greeks want to assure that the spirit remains forever in existence despite bodily death. This is consistent with the superstitious fear of windows as well. Juxtaposing the hope for eternal paradise is the fear of eternal purgatory that could arise from getting trapped in these reflective surfaces. The Greek concept of 40 days of mourning clearly evolves into a folkloric concept in and of itself, as it is born out of and coupled with many of the superstitious concepts surrounding it.

Fields

AGE: 85

Date_of_performance: May 5, 2025

Informant Name: Confidential (EZ)

Language: Greek/English

Nationality: Greek/Canadian

Occupation: Retired

Primary Language: Greek

Residence: Canada

Funeral Headbands

Context:

H is a pre-med Biology major at USC who grew up in Vancouver, Washington. His parents immigrated to the US from Vietnam.

Text:

H: “For funerals, you have to visit every day for the first week after the funeral and then once a week for seven weeks. And then, on the hundredth day since the funeral, everybody comes back to the temple. It’s like, the biggest day for them (the dead). You pray for them, wish them well at the temple. The hundredth day is when you have everybody together and you have a big feast. You have these white headbands that you wear and on the hundredth day, they chop off the headband.”

Analysis:

Since H was raised in a Viet-American household, he and his family’s celebration of weddings is similar to an Irish wake funeral, but also adds cultural specificity to Viet customs. For example, it is common in Irish funerals to throw a party on the deceased’s behalf, not only as a celebration of the deceased when they were alive but as a re-engineering of the domineering sorrow of a funeral. H’s feast on the hundredth day pays homage to the one who died without inviting negative emotions into the celebration of the individual.

Funerals are a liminal space, as Von Gennup puts it, lingering between the stages of life and death in a person’s existence on Earth. Rather than using funerals as a chance to mourn, H and Irish funeral traditions connect with members of their community and pray for safety into the next part of existing for the dead. This acceptance of death, the massive respect and commitment to the dead after the funeral, seems cultural, as does the white headbands and time. There is an acceptance of death as time marches on, not a denying of it. Rather, H’s family seems to come to terms that nothing can get in the way of death but glimmers for an appreciation of life and the one the once dead led.

Professional Mourning

Nationality: Chinese-American
Age: 19
Occupation: Student
Residence: Los Angeles
Performance Date: 4/27/2023
Language: English


Text: 

After someone dies in China, you throw a large celebration in their honor, and during these events, people often hire a professional wailer to aid in mourning. These wailers stand vigil and scream and cry for hours following a burial. They wear all white as a sign of mourning and respect.

Context: 

The last time the informant went to China when she was 9, she was walking the streets with her mother and sister in the province of Hunan when she encountered a large funeral celebration, complete with firecrackers, lights, and banners. However, at this celebration she encountered a professional wailer for the first time, dressed in all white and screaming loudly near a grave. Her mother told her that wailing is a way to honor the deceased in China, and the louder the cries, the more you honor their memory.  

Analysis: 

Chinese culture is known to promote the restraint of emotion in public settings. This culture makes it difficult or taboo for individuals to publicly cry and mourn (Cheukie). However, at the same time, not doing so at a funeral would be disrespectful towards the dead, so as a result, the practice of professional mourning was born. This is both a way of honoring the dead while also preserving the honor of the self since it is not socially proper to cry in public, and many might have a difficult time doing so when the situation does call for it. For this reason, I believe professional wailing became popular in China as a way of showing respect and reverence for the dead while also upholding the norms of social propriety. The wailers manufacture emotion, allowing negative feelings to be expressed in a way that is more culturally acceptable.

Cheukie. “Emotional Suppression in Chinese Culture.” Medium, 9 Sept. 2019, https://medium.com/@ckwan95/emotional-suppression-in-chinese-culture-b27325ec493. Accessed 1 May 2023.