In Indian weddings in general, Henna is very very important. And it is said that the darker it is, the more your husband loves you.
This belief, while known to be a mere superstition, is still venerated and guarded as paramount to the success of a marriage. So much so, that there are articles and tips in Indian wedding magazines and blogs as to how to obtain a darker stained Mehndi. Some brides, Mayuri mentioned, go so far as to bleach the skin around their upper and nether limbs in order to have the henna stand out more from their skin and appear darker.
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Seven Sisters
Once there were seven sisters and when it came time for marriage, the proposed sister decided to runaway for she did not want to be married. When her sisters saw her escaping, they followed her one-by-one and when the first runaway fell in a well, the other six followed. The constellation therefore shows the seven sisters in the well (cluster)
Indian stories, these were collected from a nomad camel driver named Haleh in the Thar desert in Rajasthan (he was Muslim, his village was near the Pakistani border). Haleh spoke only Marwari and his words were translated and related by Mayuri Bhandari. This story relates the creation of the star constellation known in North America as “the Big Dipper”. In this story, the well is the four star, square cluster (occupied by four of the sisters) and the tail is the line of the remaining three sisters waiting to throw themselves in it.
Rajasthani Wedding Games for the Groom
1. The first time the son-in-law comes to his mother-in-law’s house, the women in her family fill his mouth with sweets, and he can’t refuse.
2. The Son-in-law will also have to pick out his new wife from amongst all the women in her family (and servants). They will all cover their faces with their veils and group together. The new husband must recognize his bride by her hands and figure; if he picks her out, he gets to spend the night at her side. Otherwise, he has to sleep outside under the stars.
Just like for the bride, the marriage period is a liminal period of transition that needs to be eased. Teh groom is now responsible for his wife and is joining a new family.Unlike the bride’s experience though, the groom is not being tested like the bride for his courage, strength, intelligence, etc. This is probably a carry over form the dowry tradition, back in old days (and to this day in villages and conservative communities) the bride’s family would pay the groom’s family to marry their daughter. Thus, the groom’s family would put her to the test to make sure she was “worth the money” so to speak. Now, the dowry system is uncommon, but the practice of testing the new wife remains.
Superstitions in India
“From India, um, there’s a superstition that if you if you- if the base of your tongue is, like, dark it’s, like, kind of black, it’s called having a black tongue and it means that like when you say something it’s more likely to come true. So my mom has a black tongue, so people will, like, call, relatives will, like, call her and say, like, ‘Hey, like, could you, like, pray me for me or do this…’ or something because like it’s more likely to come true because she has a black tongue.
And then there’s the dreaming thing, which is that if you die in a dream it, uh- according to Indian superstition, if you die in a dream, then that’s good luck for the rest of your life. Which is in opposition to what a lot of the rest of the world believes happens if you die in a dream, um, yeah. That’s it.”
My informant learned of these superstitions from her family when she was growing up. She says they are common beliefs throughout India and was surprised when she first discovered they were not common in the United States. My informant was born in India, but raised in Japan, the USA, and India.
These beliefs are not of great personal importance to my informant, other than making her feel connected with her family in India. She does not believe they hold any significant truth.
What my informant was referring to was the popular Western idea that if one dies in a dream, one has died in reality.
Dasavatar (Dance)
“The form of dance I learned, Odissi, is heavily dependent on telling stories through dance and music. One of the final pieces I learned and performed was Dasavatar, which is the story of the ten incarnations of our savior. He comes in the form of a fish, a turtoise, a boar, a half man/half lion hybrid, a dwarf, a killer with an axe, a king, Krishna, Buddha, and a man on a white horse which is yet to come at the end of this era. This story shows the immense power of our God and his ability to change and adapt in the ways we need him. It was easier for me to learn various stories through dancing and acting them rather than hearing them because now they are all experiences I’ll never forget.”
The informant grew up doing this dance along with others, and she still participates in them in college. It’s a way for her to stay connected to her childhood and her heritage in an active way. The dance is also important for her connection to her religion. For her, dancing is much easier to engage with as opposed to reading a religious text or listening to a speech. As the informant says, her participation is very important in the value of every dance. Learning the different parts of the dance also signifies her maturity and mastery because each different part, or incarnation, is difficult to learn and requires a lot of practice.