Category Archives: Gestures

The Woman In The Green Dress

Nationality: American
Age: 19
Occupation: Student
Residence: Syracuse, NY
Performance Date: October 24, 2020
Primary Language: English

I am interviewing a friend (ED) from high school who is describing an old house his family used to live in that he claims had a ghost of an old owner. My friend is a member of a family with one brother, one half brother, one step brother and one step sister.

Me: What is the background of this house you used to live in?

ED: The house was a vintage, white mansion that reminded me of a colonial era home. I was only about eight years old when we moved in, but I distinctly remember being told that the old woman that used to live there died in the home before it was sold to my family.

Me: Was there any remains of the past owner in the home when you first moved?

ED: All the furniture was moved out of the house for the most part. The odd part was that throughout the house, family pictures were littered around on the walls and remaining furniture, almost as if there were no family members left to take them or want them.

Me: And this is where your story begins as I recall?

ED: When you first walk into the house, a giant portrait of the old woman was still up on the main wall of the foyer. I couldn’t keep my eyes off of the image. The lady had on a long, green dress that shined through the portrait. As we settled into the house and set up our rooms to move in, we took down the portrait and threw it out. After about a week, all of my siblings started seeing this woman in a green dress roaming around the house and coming into our rooms at night.

Me: Your family all saw this while you were together?

ED: No, each of us had our own room and would come downstairs the next morning each claiming that we woke up and saw her in our doorway or walking in the hallway. I would hear footsteps coming from outside of my room and by the time I could get out of bed to check, she would be gone.

Me: And did your parents see this ghost as well given that they were sleeping in the master bedroom?

ED: Surprisingly not. Neither of my parents saw this lady and claimed that we were all just goofing around or seeing things.

Me: Did this ghost ever do any harm, or take any actions on you or your family?

ED: No, it was almost as if this lady was just hanging out around the house and checking up on us. You would think that she would try to get us out of the house that was previously hers, but she seemed okay with us being there.

Me: And why do you think that would be?

ED: Because the lady didn’t seem to have any family left by the way her house was left without taking the pictures of her and her family, I think the woman enjoyed our company in her home after living the end of her life in it by herself. I was never scared to see her at night since she always seemed to be smiling at me as she moved on throughout the house.

Me: Did you continue to see her until you moved out?

ED: After a few months, all of us stopped seeing her or noticing her movement around the house. It was almost as if one day, she dipped out of the house and officially gave it to us.

This story given by my friend was very interesting because it did not go how I expected. When I first talked to him about it vaguely before interviewing him, he just said he used to live in a house that was haunted. After interviewing him and diving deeper into the story behind it, I came to realize that this house may have had a spirit within it still, but in a friendly way. I always assume that in a story such as this where a family moves into the home of a deceased person, the person who died in the home would come back to haunt the newcomers and push them out of the house. In this case, it was actually the opposite. Even though the informant’s family threw out her belongings and images, the spirit or ghost of the old owner never went out of her way to induce harm or wrongful actions to scare the family. Instead, she rather seemed to enjoy their company and never went out of her way to punish or scare any of them. The way the spirit, still with her beautiful green dress on, just roamed around the house at night checking on the children without bothering the parents has impactful meaning to her intentions. In my analysis, I believe that the spirit was looking out for the children she never had in a way of making up for her loneliness. She never bothered the parents or went near them, but was seen coming in and out of each of the childrens rooms. I had my suspicions that this was the case, and when my friend claimed that she “always seemed to be smiling” at him, it occurred to me that this spirit is enjoying the company and family in her home that she didn’t have before her death. Spirits such as this are interesting because although they are still roaming around trying to fulfill their lives and move on, they aren’t necessarily taking any action. This spirit potentially was fulfilling her need for family and care was finding this by simply watching over the new family in her home. My informant and his siblings grew to genuinely enjoy this spirits company, which must have fulfilled her need and let her spirit move on, away from her home as she let a new family in.

Bowing Down Twice

Nationality: Korean
Age: 50
Occupation: Professor
Residence: South Korea
Performance Date: April 25th, 2020
Primary Language: Korean

Context :

My informant is an adult female who was born in Seoul, South Korea. She received Korean education throughout her life and mainly speaks Korean. She believes in Buddhism and has been attending temple events for a long time. Her family also are Buddhist and follows the Buddhist way when it comes to events such as funerals and ancestral rites. Here, she is describing why bowing down only twice is important during a memorial rite or a funeral. This piece was collected over a phone call in Korean and was translated into English.

She told me that to understand this piece, you need to understand the Yin and the Yang (negative and positive) culture of Asian countries. Yin, is the power that is believed to be dark and negative, while Yang is the positive power. 

In Korean funerals or memorial rites, people only bow down twice. It is believed that one’s first bow means the Yang power and the second bow means the Yin power. This means that the first bow is only meant for the people who are living and the second bow is for the people who are dead and no longer in this ‘living’ world. Thus, when you bow down to the families of the dead, you only bow once because they are alive, and you bow down twice to show respect to the dead. Events that require bowing down and related to death such as a funeral or an ancestral rite will require bowing down twice. 

My informant also highlighted that all bows should be performed with the utmost respect because this is a matter of living and the dead. 

Analysis :

When I was young and attended funerals, I remember peeking through my arm to see how many times my parents were bowing down. I was sometimes confused because they would bow down once in some situations and would bow down twice in some situations. This connection of Yin and Yang with the funeral culture show how Asian countries strongly believe in the ‘powers’ of negativity and positivity and its connection to Confucianism; you need to have detailed and precise actions even when you are showing respect to your ancestors.

Dap him up

Nationality: American
Age: 14
Occupation: student
Residence: Los Angeles
Performance Date: April 29
Primary Language: English

Main Piece:

In an all-boys environment, usually if you don’t personally know someone, or if you’re like acquaintances, you greet them with a dap. A dap is like if you were to shake hands, but there’s a little more to it. You like grab the guy’s hand, and you hold it lightly and casually, and it’s more up and down and slidey. There’s multiple kinds, but this is the typical form, especially when you’re meeting someone new. It’s called dapping. An example is your friend introduces you to one of their friends, and so you dap them up as a greeting, and say what’s up. I don’t know where I learned that, but I’ve probably been doing it since summer going into freshman year, or that’s when it became super normal.

Context:

This is my little brother talking to me as we sit casually together.

Background:

My informant/brother goes to an all-boys school, and is a masculine boy with a lot of male friends. He would be considered “bro-ey” or a jock. He is a freshman in high school.

Thoughts/analysis:

Almost every American boy I have ever known does this. It’s an informal greeting, and a very masculine one. They don’t hug, but they always do this. Girls joke about it.

Dayenu, a Passover song

Nationality: American but Persian
Age: 19
Occupation: student
Residence: Beverly Hills
Performance Date: April 26, 2020
Primary Language: English

The following is transcribed from text exchanges between my informant, A, and myself, M.

Main piece:

A: On passover, there’s this tradition that Persian Jews have, and somehow only us. There’s this song called Dayenu that you sing as part of the Passover seder, which is like what we call the food and tradition we do.

A: Passover is about Jews being slaves in Egypt and Passover is specifically about when the Jews were freed, and that’s basically the whole thing. But this song is part of it, and its about thanking God for each specific thing He did in the story. And for Persian Jews, while we sing the song we hit each other with green onions because they symbolize the whips from slavemasters. We get pretty agressive, and it looks really stupid.

M: Why just Persians?

A: I don’t know how it started or why it never made it to any other ethnic Jewish group. I didn’t even know it was a Persian thing until like late into my life, so when I talked about it with my white friends, they thought I was insane.

She later texted me that her parents told her Italian Jews do it as well.

Background: My friend is Persian Jewish from Beverly Hills. Judaism has played a large role in her life, having gone to Jewish high school and been an active participant in the community since birth.

Context: She and I were texting casually, and I asked if I could collect from her.

Thoughts:

Food is a way of communicating, and from what I have learned about the Passover ritual is that it is a very active one, almost like a play. Also that food is heavily involved. I am left curious as to why Persians specifically do this part.

Socks are DIY hair curlers.

Nationality: Italian American
Age: 54
Occupation: entrepreneur
Residence: Los Angeles
Performance Date: April 27
Primary Language: English

Grandma used to curl my hair with socks. They have to be nylon knee socks so that they can be crushed and tied, and you sleep in it. When your hair is just a tiny bit wet out of the shower, you stick all those socks in, and you wake up very curly. I think I did it to you, remember? I kept doing it, because it stayed so much better than regular curlers, it would stay for days. I would do it all the way until I got married. I don’t know anyone else who would do that. I learned it from grams.

Background and context: This was told to me by my mother, who is a white baby boomer. She is close with her mom, who is from the Great Generation. My mom grew up in Pittsburgh.

Thoughts: This is likely from before hair curlers’ existence. I have seen the style, and it looks more old-fashioned. I think this is people figuring out a way to curl before they had the technology, and it could be swapped out easily for another method.